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Chapter 1
Buffy sat on the couch, knees curled up to her chest;
she stared at the talk show on television. It was an old rerun of a Jerry Springer episode. She watched as two women pulled
at each other’s hair and scratched, involve din a crazy catfight. But she barely registered what was happening. It didn’t
mean anything to her, she could see the people on the screen and identify what they were doing, but it wasn’t real.
It meant nothing.
This was how it always went, every day, after her sister left for school Buffy stayed home. She
sat around the house doing nothing. She rarely left. She couldn’t deal with people very well anymore. After everything
that had happened this past year, she preferred to be alone. If she was alone, and didn’t get attached to people then
she couldn’t feel hurt or pain over them.
Just what had happened to make her feel so bad? Too many things.
It had started when her boyfriend of two years had split up with her. He had been seeing other women, lots of the, behind
her back. But she had caught him out. And without a word, he left. Then, her father had been killed in a car crash. Sure they
weren’t particularly close, but he was still her father, and she loved him. Things went from bad to worse when her mom
was diagnosed with a brain tumour a few weeks later. She was dead within a few months. Then her ex had shown up, married.
To a beautiful, clever, friendly woman. And Buffy felt very inadequate. Everything had happened one thing after another and
she had just gotten so down, so much pain and loss and she didn’t want to experience that anymore. So she didn’t
leave and she didn’t get close to anyone when she did. So, she kept herself locked away because if she did that, then
nothing could affect her.
But that didn’t mean she didn’t have any responsibilities. She had to
look after herself, but that wasn’t a priority anymore in her own opinion. But she did have to take care of her sister.
Upon the death of her mother, Buffy gained guardianship of 14-year-old Dawn. With their father dead also, there was nobody
else. Buffy tried to keep up appearances when Dawn was home; after all she was the adult, Dawn was the child. And she had
to act like it. But when she was alone, Buffy closed herself off from the whole world.
The ringing of the phone
startled Buffy
She reached out and picked it up “Hello”
Buffy listened to the voice on the other
side.
“Anya, I am fine. I’ve been fine”
“I am not doing that, listen Anya, I
know you’re just trying to help but I promise I will be fine. Ok, you guys can come over if you really want but there
really is no need. Ok see you in a few.”
Buffy rolled her eyes, she loved her friends and she knew all they were
trying to do was help. But sometimes she felt like they were smothering her. They had hurt just as much when her mom died,
and they knew it had been rough on her and they cared. They wanted to be there to help her take care of everything but she
felt it was for her to take care of by herself. She may not be taking care of herself, but she did her best to do everything
she had to for Dawn. But, she couldn’t shut her friends out forever, and they would be there soon, so she had to go
get changed.
They arrived twenty minutes later en masse. All 4 of them anyway. She made sure she was smiling
and tried to seem a little like her old self.
“Hey guys” she greeted them as she led them into the living
room. They all said their own enthusiastic hello’s as they sat down around the room. For a few moments, when they were
all comfortable, a somewhat uncomfortable silence filled the air. They all looked at each other, waiting for someone else
to be the first to speak. Annoyed by this, Anya eventually sighed, and blunt as ever said outright
“Buffy you
need to stop moping and get a job.”
Buffy saw her whole group of friends flinch at once, and she was little shocked
herself. In fact she was so shocked she couldn’t speak. She simply looked silently around the room, urging someone to
explain.
“Buffy, what Anya means is, we think that maybe if you had a job or something to do during the day then
maybe you would start to feel better about yourself, and feel like you were able to move on,” Tara, the ever reasonable
and kind member of the group explained in her usual diplomatic fashion.
“Guys, I’m fine. I have moved on.
I don’t need a job to help me with that. I’m happy,” she insisted.
But they weren’t buying
it.
“Buff, we’re worried about you. You never do anything anymore; you never come out with us. You always
have an excuse as to why you can’t do something. And it scares us; because the way things are with you, we’re
scared that the next funeral we go to is going to be yours. You are making yourself ill. Depression is an illness Buff, but
you’re wallowing in yours, you’re not letting yourself get better.” Xander finally let out everything they
had all wanted to say to her for months.
Buffy could see worry etched in their features.
“Ok, if it’ll
make you feel better I’ll get a job. But guys, I’ve had a rough time, it’s going to be a while before I’m
over it, before I feel like me again. I don’t know if I ever will, but if you’re that worried.” She allowed
her voice to trail off.
Her friends all nodded, relieved and moved to hug her. Hey all thanked her. They were worried
but she promised them, and they knew that she tried to keep any promise she ever made to them.
Before they got
a chance to start any new conversation, and excited dawn came bounding through the front door. She ran into the living room,
greeting the people there before starting to babble almost incoherently
“You guys will never guess what, there
was a new guy at school today and he’s really cool. And super hot. Anyway, I was talking to him…”
They
all listened as intently as they could, but they knew they were going to be there for a while listening to info on her newest
crush
Chapter 2
“Dawn can you-“ Buffy stopped abruptly
as the teen walked right by her and out the door, blatantly ignoring her.
Buffy sighed; she had seen a huge change
in Dawn in the past month. Buffy had gotten a job in the local Burger King so she wasn’t been home as often, but the
change was physically noticeable. It wasn’t just the attitude. Although that had changed too.
All of a sudden
Dawn had gone for the bad girl look. Dressing in skimpy, punk style clothes. She was all tight leather trousers and skirts,
with tight, low cut crop- tops. She was going heavy on her make- up, and cut her hair, putting streaks through it. It would
have been hard not to notice that.
The attitude, well it was bad. Dawn always seemed moody. She was constantly
being rude. She had started coming and going as she pleased and never bothered to tell Buffy anything. She was acting all
badass. Buffy had heard from the high school a lot too; mostly about Dawn skipping class, being rude to teachers and not handing
in homework. But it was all so unlike Dawn. Buffy would admit, that after everything that had happened, Dawn had been different.
She had been moodier and gone downhill but things had been getting better. But now they were getting better, well at least,
they had been. But Dawn had changed again, and it seemed to have all started
*one month earlier*
Dawn
stood by her locker. The blonde guy walked out of history class, a tired and unconcerned look on her face. He was gorgeous.
Dawn was infatuated, she had never seen such a beautiful creature. His eyes were like depths of crystal. So amazingly blue,
you couldn’t imagine a nicer colour. And cheekbones so sharp they could cut glass. And he had a lazy smirk, and it just
added to his hotness. He dressed all in black, against his pale complexion it was stunning. That and the bleach blonde hair,
slicked back mostly but a few unruly curls flying free. Beautiful.
She new beautiful wasn’t the manliest
description, but it was the most accurate.
When he was standing by his own locker she started walking, deliberately
walking past his locker. She had only gotten a few feet past him when she heard his deep, English accent call out to her
“Hey,
Summers.”
Dawn swung around to look at him, trying her best to look calm and cool
“Hi, Spike”
He
gave her that smirk and she could have melted
“So, what do you have next?” he asked
“English,”
she told him dully.
He got a cheeky glint in his eye “wanna skip?”
Dawn felt excited, he was asking
her to skip class with him. It was almost as good as a date “Sure,” she answered enthusiastically. Spike smirked
again and gave a bow, leading the way for her to follow.
She did so willingly, they went out the main doors and met
a group of people. She recognised them as the bad crowd, and Spike’s friends. He introduced them one by one and then
they all left together. They went to the beach, and had a lot of fun. And not all of it so wholesome.
*end flashback*
Spike,
Buffy thought to herself. Ever since he first started Sunnydale High and Dawn had become crazy about him, her sister had changed.
Buffy did not like the influence he had over her sister. And she hated to think about what they were doing, she knew what
he was supposed to be like. She had heard the things people said. This was a small town, people talked when there was someone
new, even if they were only 14. And especially when they had the reputation that this particular 14 year old had. And she
didn’t like what he was doing to her sister, and she wouldn’t put up with it. Glancing at the clock she saw she
had over an hour before she had to be at work, but there was something she wanted to do first.
Buffy waited
patiently for someone to answer the door. Eventually, a young brunette woman did, she looked at Buffy, taking her in completely
“Can
I help you?” she asked
“Um, yes, I’m looking for Liam Madison”
“Why?” the
girl asked rudely
“Because I have to talk to him about something.”
“Fine, Angel, someone here
to see you,” the brunette yelled.
A tall, handsome, dark- haired room came to the door, and eyed Buffy. Much
the same way the girl did.
“What can I do for you?” he had a bored look on his face, as though he didn’t
really care.
“It’s about your brother. He’s been hanging around with my sister and I don’t
like it. She has changed since hanging around with him”
“And what do you want me to do about it?”
he asked.
“I want you to do something about it. Talk to him, he’s in your care after all, he’s a bad
influence,” she was getting angry.
“Look, the kid can do what he wants, if your sister is a brat it isn’t
my brother’s fault. If you can’t take care if her properly that’s your fault not mine.”
Buffy
saw red, how dare he “Listen, until your brother showed up my sister was fine. She wasn’t an angel but she didn’t
behave like she has been.”
“Oh save us the sob story,” the brunette woman snapped “Spike is
a kid. He isn’t perfect but he doesn’t make your sister’s decisions. She’s your problem, not ours.”
With
that the door was slammed in her face. Buffy stood there stunned.
Chapter 3
As the weeks wore on the situation with Dawn got increasingly
worse. She was always moody and she and Buffy were arguing constantly because of Dawn’s refusal to do anything she was
told. Her attitude was terrible. And Buffy really was too tired most of the time to want to argue. She was working as much
as possible as her way to keep her friends happy and herself busy. And the last thing she wanted or needed when she came home
was to argue with her sister. But as the time passed she became more worried about her.
She was always coming home
late and Buffy never gave Buffy an answer about where she had been, and what with the way she had been acting lately, Buffy
was afraid and had a suspicion that perhaps Dawn had been taking drugs. To Buffy’s mind, the change in her sister was
too big for it to simply be from hanging out with a new crowd. And Buffy was seriously worried, she didn’t know what
she would do if drugs were involved. After all, this was her little sister who, until a couple of months ago, had been a descent
kid. Yes she had had some problems but that was understandable. The concept that she may have gotten involved in something
like drugs was something Buffy could barely comprehend. But with how things had been she also knew that it was a distinct
possibility. The only problem was how she was going to find out, and what exactly was going to happen if her suspicion proved
to be true. Buffy had had many arguments with Spike too. Always about his lack of respect and his bad influence on Dawn but
he never paid any attention and Buffy was about ready to strangle him. He was the most irritating and rude person she had
ever met. And the sooner he was gone the better in Buffy’s opinion.
Buffy thought about that one Friday
afternoon as she walked home from work. Dawn had to know Spike for about 3 months. Dawn would be in school now so that would
give her time to think about things, but she had come to the decision that confronting Dawn was probably her only real option.
She had to know if she was right or not. Constantly wondering was really getting to her. If she was right she wanted to know
now so that she could do something about it.
She walked inside and immediately dropped into a seat in the living
room. She’d had a long day and she wanted the time to relax before Dawn got home from school, she figured she had about
an hour. She had just got comfortable when she heard something upstairs, sitting still for a moment and listening carefully
she heard it again. A creaking, she got up to go and check it up. She climbed the stairs as quietly as she could. As she got
closer she identified the sounds as coming from Dawn’s room. She put her hand on the handle and turned gently, she pushed
the door open and gasped at the scene before her, Dawn was naked and laying in bed with two boys. Buffy couldn’t help
the yell that came from her
“What the hell is going on?”
Dawn jumped, pulling the sheets up to cover
her. Buffy finally registered that one of the boys in question was Spike and that was the icing on the cake, she lost it.
“Get
out of my sisters bed now, get dressed and get out.”
Both boys jumped to do as she said, while Dawn tried to
reach down for her clothes, Buffy stomped over picked them up and tossed them to her. Buffy waited angrily for them to dress
and the boys made immediately for the door. Buffy blocked the door part way though; she motioned with her head for the other
boy to leave while she looked directly at Spike
“You, downstairs, now. You too Dawn,” Buffy commanded.
She
waltzed out the door, and looked over her shoulder to ensure that they were following. As soon as they were all in the living
room Buffy let them have it. Firstly it was Spike
“You, who the hell do you think you are? You have done nothing
but cause trouble with my sister since your sorry ass first arrived here. And now, you are in my home having sex with my 14-year-old
sister. And I don’t care if you are the same age, you are more experienced than she is, that much I know, and I swear
you will regret crossing me.”
Barely pausing she turned and started her tirade on Dawn
“And
Dawn, what were you playing at? Brining two guys back here when you knew I would be home from work. And more to the point,
why were you having a threesome, or sex at all for that matter? Dawn you are 14. And you may like to think you are bad and
grown up but you’re not. At the end of the day you’re still a little girl and you have no idea what the implications
of having sex are. At least not the emotional implications and those are implications that you are too young to deal with.
I am so disappointed in you Dawn.”
Then Dawn turned on her
“Well guess what Buffy,” Dawn spat,
voice full of venom, “I don’t care what you think. If I wanna have sex then I will and with as many guys as I
want. And there is nothing you can do about it, and don’t dare speak to my friends that way again.” With a flip
of her hair Dawn began to walk away
“Come on Spike.” With that she stomped out of the house slamming the door
behind her.
Buffy hadn’t seen Dawn since it happened. She had come home and went straight to her
room , she left in the mornings before Buffy woke up and didn’t come home until she knew Buffy would be in bed. That
had been going on for a week. Buffy had tried contacting Spike’s brother again but he had been useless. He hadn’t
even allowed her to finish telling him what had happened.
Buffy hadn’t felt so stressed in a while as she opened
her front door and walked inside. She heard the crying before she entered the living room and saw Dawn sitting there. Something
dangling from her hand. Buffy rushed and kneeled by her side. She looked at what her sister was holding and gasped. Dawn looked
at her with blotchy eyes and said quietly
“Buffy, I’m pregnant.”
Buffy pulled her into a bone-crushing
hug. Holding on to her for dear life, shushing her soothingly. Buffy tried to hide her own anxiety. But she felt like her
entire world had just caved in. But there were some issues that had to be dealt with
“Dawn, who’s the father?
Is it Spike?”
In a whisper Dawn answered, “Maybe.”
This was a bit of a shock, although why
she didn’t know. “Why maybe, Dawn how many boys have there been?”
“A few, maybe 10. Every guy
in the group and a couple not in the group.”
Buffy looked at her sister and for a brief minute felt like she
was looking at a stranger. “How many have you had unprotected sex with?”
“Um, 4. But Spike is the
only one I slept with more than once or twice. And we’ve never, you know.”
Buffy sighed, holding her own
tears back.
“What are we gonna do Buffy?”
In that moment Buffy saw her little sister again, the
little girl she knew and she felt sad.
“I don’t know,” she said honestly.
Chapter 4
After she got over the shock the anger set in. She
was angry with Dawn for allowing herself to change so much and get so caught up in a guy that she got herself into that situation.
She was angry that Dawn hadn’t cared about any kinds of consequences until she actually had to deal with them. She was
angry that now she was expected to come up with a solution.
She was angry with herself, for not being able to discipline
Dawn properly. Angry that she hadn’t taken good enough care of her little sister, that she hadn’t done enough
to keep her away from Spike and his gang. Angry because she thought it was unfair that she had been left to deal with it,
but not by Dawn, by their mother.
But most of all, she was angry at Spike. Ok, so Dawn said he may not be the
father, but he could be. But she was angry because it was getting involved with Spike that had meant Dawn got involved with
the others. Spike had led her astray he was a bad influence. Buffy was angry that he didn’t seem to care about Buffy’s
opinion of him and that he seemed to think it was okay to do what he did. Angry that he was so arrogant. And absolutely furious
that he could be the one to have done this to her sister.
Eventually Buffy couldn’t keep her anger to
herself, she had argued with Dawn about it already but she knew that shouting wouldn’t help things any. And she didn’t
want to cause a bigger rift between Dawn and herself so she let it go. But she couldn’t do that now.
Dawn
had told her only a few hours ago, and for at least the past three hours she had been seething with anger and seriously wanted
to hurt Spike. After pacing the living room for over an hour since Dawn had gone to bed and cried herself to sleep, Buffy
decided to go and have a chat with the boy in question. Or more accurately, she was going to go and do a lot of yelling.
She
knocked on the door and waited, no answer came. She tried again and still no answer. She could see a light on in a room upstairs,
so she tried the door, it opened and she went inside. She checked the living room, seeing nobody there she guessed that Angel
and his girlfriend were out. So she marched straight upstairs.
Spike heard the downstairs door open and thought
that Angel and his newest bit must be home. He didn’t bother moving from his spot on the bed. He was surprised though
when his door slammed open and an angry Buffy came storming in.
Buffy took one look at him lying on top of
his bed, as if he hadn’t a care in the world and it made her furious. She didn’t even let him get a word in before
she started shouting
“You no good piece of shit,” she yelled moving closer to the bed, “do you have
any idea what you have done? You may have destroyed my sister’s life. I told you I didn’t want you around her
but you just couldn’t listen. All you want to do is cause trouble, get what you want and take it. You don’t care
bout whose life you ruin along the way. You are a good for nothing piece of scum, my baby sister is pregnant and that is your
fault. Even if you’re not the father, it’s your fault, you are the one that got her involved in all that crap.”
She screamed.
With that Spike got angry and leapt up from the bed, and began talking in a low, even voice “Listen
here, I don’t care what you think about me. But let’s get one thing straight, your baby sis made her own decisions,
when she was fucking those guys it was because she wanted to. Nobody forced her to do anything that she didn’t want
to. So don’t blame me for that. And if she is pregnant, so what? You haven’t asked my opinion on this and quite
frankly at the minute I don’t want one.” He was getting closer and closer to her, his English accent thick as
he spoke
“But don’t come in here and start yelling the odds at me with your holier than thou attitude you
sanctimonious cow. It isn’t my fault you couldn’t control her or that she was a little whore who was begging for
it every chance she got.” He was right in Buffy’s face now, “but maybe that’s your problem, maybe
you’re the same and you’re just mad because you can’t get any.”
Buffy gritted her teeth as
she listened, but as he finished the his sentence she lost the last of her temper and lashed out, pushing him with all her
strength. He stumbled backwards, but retaliated a moment later, pushing her into the wall. He strode towards her,
“I
wasn’t planning on hurting you,” he said adding in his head ‘much’.
“You haven’t
even come close to hurting me,” she told him defiantly. She pushed him away, circling so that his back was to the wall,
and then pushed him into it.
“What’s the matter, afraid I’m gonna-“ she cut him off by kissing
him. She didn’t know why and she didn’t particularly care, suddenly she wanted him. It was a hard, brutal kiss.
There was no affection or emotion. Spike pushed her backwards and never broke the kiss as he walked her backwards until her
back hit the far away wall.
As their tongues battled, Buffy slid a hand down between them and slid down his zipper,
slipping her hand inside, feeling him grow harder at her touch.
Spike spun them round never breaking contact and the
kiss grew harder. They parted to catch their breath. He looked at her surprised but he wasn’t going to stop her, he
wasn’t stupid.
They resumed kissing and Buffy tried to move so that her legs were around his waist, they managed
for a moment and she started to undo his button, but they lost balance and fell to the floor. Buffy sat atop Spike, he looked
at her as she undid his button, and then pushed her panties to the side. Taking him in her hand, she slid down on him without
hesitation.
They both gasped at the feeling of being joined so intimately. She waited only a moment before she began
to move on top of him. She started off slowly, just rocking slightly, getting used to the feel of him within her. She soon
started quickening her pace, her movements becoming harder. It was raw passion and pure lust. She placed her hands on his
chest to keep her balanced as she rode him hard and fast. Emitting sounds of passion as she did. Neither ever spoke the others
name, it wasn’t important.
Buffy could feel herself nearing completion; she leaned down, bringing their lips
together again. Their tongues locked in a fierce duel. Buffy moved faster, Spike thrusting up to meet her every time she thrusted
down. Buffy arched her back a little, her moans becoming louder and more frequent.
She could hear Spike gasp and
groan beneath her as she moved on him. But she was only concerned with her own satisfaction. She was riding him rapidly now,
almost there. She thrust her tongue into his mouth. Pulling back, she arched her back, shouting
“Oh god, as she
convulsed around him.
Spike lay meeting her thrusts, holding tightly onto her sides as she moved. He was groaning
at his pleasure, but he didn’t want to make too much noise in case she came out of the trance she seemed to be in and
put an end to it. He was too close for that to happen. He couldn’t help the loud moan that escaped when he felt her
walls clamp around him as she reach climax. Holding onto her tightly, his fingers digging into her hips, he thrust up hard
another few times, and couldn’t hold back any longer
“Buffy,” he roared as he came, spilling himself
inside of her.
His head hit the floor with a bump, Buffy’s head on his chest as they gasped for breath.
When
they woke next it was morning, Buffy looked around, and felt sick to her stomach when she saw Spike lying naked beside her.
She moved away and started dressing.
“Oh, Oh god,” she winced as she threw her clothes on as she caught
sight once again of the naked boy on the floor.
“What’s the matter luv, I know you enjoyed it, what with
how many times you decided to have an encore.”
Buffy scowled at him ”You’re a pig Spike.”
“Oink
oink, want another shot?”
“Never again,” she told him voice full of disgust before fleeing the room
and the house.
Chapter 5
As soon as Buffy had gotten home after leaving Spike’s
she had taken a shower, trying to scrub away that had happened. She felt dirty, he was 14, she was 21 it was totally wrong
and illegal, and oh god what had she done? She couldn’t believe that she had let it happen, she still didn’t completely
understand how it had happened. She had been so angry and she really wanted to hit him. And the she looked at him and the
next thing she knew she was kissing him. She hadn’t meant for it to happen, she had intended going over and shouting
at him and giving him what for over her sister’s pregnancy. But what she done? She had sex with him. So not part of
her plan. And now she felt dirty and wrong, she did something so wrong. But thinking back over a week later on how wrong it
was, why did she find herself wanting more?
Spike couldn’t stop thinking about her, she had become his
every thought. Before all she had done was piss him off and he wanted her to leave him alone. Now he just wanted her. He had
wanted to go see her every day. But he knew that if he did she would just get angry, not that he was bothered by that; he
just wanted to get her in a good mood. He figured she would be more receptive to his advances then. So he could bide his time
a little while longer, but he was determined; he would have her again.
Buffy had just finished getting
dressed for work when a knock came at her bedroom door. She turned round just as awn came through the door. She hadn’t
seen much of her sister since the day she had found out she was pregnant and told Buffy, they hadn’t spoken about what
Dawn was going to do about the pregnancy. But Buffy wasn’t as worried about where Dawn was anymore, often she was only
in her room
“Hey Dawn, what’s up?”
“We need to talk,” the teen said sitting on
the bed.
Buffy nodded mutely, she had time before she had to be at work anyway. She sat beside Dawn and waited to hear
what she had to say. She could tell by her sister’s face that she didn’t want to put it off.
“I decided
what I’m going to do about the baby,” Dawn told her.
Buffy looked at her a little shocked. Dawn hadn’t
discussed anything with her about what decision she was going to do. But instead of voicing any of her thoughts on the situation
she decided to let Dawn go ahead and say her piece,
“I’m keeping it Buffy.”
“Dawn, are
you sure? You never spoke to me about this, I would have liked to help you.”
“I know, but Buffy, it’s
my body, it had to be my decision. I had to do it alone and not let myself be influenced by what anyone else wanted or thought
was best for me. I know you only want to help me and I appreciate it, I really, really do. But please understand,” Dawn
said in a somewhat pleading voice.
Buffy could understand; she didn’t want to force Dawn to make any
particular decision. But she would have liked to be included and been able to help Dawn through. But now wasn’t the
time to say anything and risk rocking the boat.
“Ok, but Dawnie, I would have been ok with your decision. I just
want you to be sure that you’re doing the right thing. But if it’s what you want, I’m beside you all the
way.”
“It is what I want, I can’t kill or give away my baby,” Dawn said.
“Ok,”
“Oh
and Buffy, I’m sorry for everything. I know that I acted out. But I’m going to try and be better I promise. I
know I took things bad but I didn’t have to act out the way I did. I will try,” Dawn assured her older sister.
“Alright,
thank you.”
“I love you Buffy, I know I don’t say it enough.”
“I love you too,
Dawnie. Now come here and give me a hug,” Dawn scooted over on the bed and hugged her sister tight, glad that things
seemed a little brighter.
Buffy yawned standing behind the counter watching a customer leave. She was working
the late shift and there had only been 2 or 3 customers in the last two hours. When she had first started work it had been
quite busy but as it got later the number of customers decreased. And now she was utterly bored. She had around an hour and
a half of her shift left and with so few customers she would probably end up cleaning the grill.
Ten minutes
later Buffy sighed as she pulled the mop and bucket in front of the counter. She had been told to clean the floor, and as
much as she hated it at least it wasn’t cleaning grill. As she walked in front of the counter she caught a glimpse of
something through the window. She doubled back and looked out, seeing Spike standing there. He beckoned for her to go outside
with a jerk of his head.
As much as she wanted to resist and stay inside, she found herself telling her manager
that she was taking her break and going outside. She looked around and finally sawn him leaning up against a wall.
“Hey
pet, did ya miss me?” he smirked, his English accent thick.
Buffy rolled her eyes, “What do you want Spike?”
He
came towards her, smirk still firmly in place. When he reached her he leaned in and whispered in her ear “you.”
“Yeah,
well you can’t have me.”
“Isn’t this a fast food restaurant?” he asked innocently.
“Yes,
but I’m not on the menu,” she told him firmly.
“Shame, because I just want to eat you all up.”
Buffy
grimaced, “Spike that’s just wrong. That is the worst line I have ever heard.”
“Not a line,
completely true,” he told her.
“Spike, I told you that this couldn’t happen again and I meant it.”
“Come
on Buffy, you know you want me. Why deny it?” he leaned in and kissed her, although she tried to protest at first she
soon found herself giving in and responding.
“Come with me,” he whispered, taking her hand and pulling
her round to the alley behind the restaurant. When she got there he pushed her back against a black car.
“Spike,
we can’t do this on someone’s car” Buffy protested.
“We’re not, we’re doing it
on my car,” he stated proudly.
“You’re too young to drive,” she reminded him.
“I’m
too young to do a lot of things, doesn’t mean I don’t do it,” he leered at her. Before she could say he
covered her mouth with his again. As he did he slipped a hand between them and undid the button of her uniform pants, while
she worked on the fly of his jeans.
They broke apart for air and she pulled his jeans around his knees, and then as
he kissed her again he thrust into her, making her moan slightly. Spike didn’t take it easy; he thrust into her with
abandon. Buffy stayed mostly still, trying to stay detached from the situation. But when he put a hand between them and started
rubbing her clit she began to respond, moving to meet each of his thrust. Soon she was moaning and writhing on the hood of
the car as Spike moved inside of her. Spike kissed his way down her neck. Buffy could feel herself getting closer as she moved
with him. And soon she shook with the power of her orgasm, Spike thrusted a couple more times before following her over the
edge.
Buffy didn’t take any time to bask in the afterglow; instead she pushed him away and pulled her pants
back up. She moved to walk past him but he grabbed her arm
“Buffy, why are you doing this to me?”
“Because
this is wrong Spike. It doesn’t matter how good the sex its, this is illegal. You’re fourteen years old, have
you any idea how much trouble I could get into if anyone found out about this?” Buffy was desperate to make him see.
“You
think the sex is good?” he smirked
“Yes, it’s good.” She admitted.
“I won’t
give up that easily you know,” he warned her.
“Don’t I know it,” she muttered as she walked
away.
“You’ll be with me in the end Buffy,” he called out to her just before she walked back inside.
Chapter 6
True to his promise, Spike’s determination
hadn’t faltered. He continuously called Buffy during the day when she wasn’t working, in the middle of the night
and any other time he knew Dawn wouldn’t be home but Buffy would. He had also taken to sitting in a booth at the fast
food place when she was working. Buffy had done her best to ignore him but quite often she found it difficult to do. Mostly
because he wouldn’t shut up, whenever she was within a foot of him he was saying something. He was al with the sexual
innuendo’s and stuff. And she could admit it was difficult not to respond.
Spike knew he was getting
to her, he could see how she reacted each time he showed up when she was working. She would sneak glances when she thought
he wasn’t looking or she would open her mouth to say something before scurrying as far away as possible. Her resolve
was fading, he could tell. All he had to do was bide his time, she would give in eventually and he was going to be around
when it happened.
Buffy sighed as she left the house and saw Spike standing in front of the driveway.
She walked right past him, but he followed her
“I’m not going away Buffy, I told you that I wouldn’t
and I meant it. I like you, a lot and I don’t give up. I always get what I want and what I want is you. So you can keep
ignoring me but I’ll still be here, so there’s no point in it,” he told her.
“Spike, please.
You’re not making things any better for me.”
“That’s the point,” he said.
Buffy
spun round to look at him, “Spike, I am trying to come to terms with the fact that my baby sister is pregnant, with
a child that is possibly yours might I add. I don’t need the added pressure of you following me around. I can’t
handle it.”
“Yeah, but I know we could have something. Deny that you feel anything for me, if you do that
then, well I still won’t leave you alone but I’ll know how you feel,” he looked at her with puppy dog eyes.
“I
can’t do this now,” she said before breaking into a run and leaving him standing in the middle of the street.
Buffy
was relived when she reached work and saw that he hadn’t followed her again. She needed time away from him; she just
wanted to get on with her work and forget about everything.
Things with Dawn were still pretty strained. Her sister
had tried to make things up to her but Buffy was still having a hard time getting used to everything, she was trying to but
it was going to take time. They weren’t arguing about things but there was uneasiness, Dawn trying too hard and Buffy
just wanting everything to go back to normal. Even though she knew they never would.
Luckily she was working the
afternoon shift so the place was busy. Within a few minutes of arriving she was rushed off her feet. She was working the counter
as usual, and there was no time between each customer. A lot of them were high school and college kids. So her time was filled
with taking orders and making sure each customer was satisfied. And although she wouldn’t necessarily describe it as
pleasant due to how absolutely monotonous the job was, but at least it took her mind off the other stuff.
Spike
walked into his house and into the living room where Angel sat on the couch with a can of beer. Spike sighed and flopped down
on the chair across from him
“What’s up?” Angel asked.
“What do you do, when you’re
totally crazy for a girl and she barely even recognises your existence. I think I’m in love with her but she won’t
take a chance,” Spike whined.
“Little brother, you’re fourteen you don’t need to be talking
about love. What you need to do is go out and find an easy chick. Get yourself laid, you’ll soon forget about this other
girl. Because if she’s not screwing you, you may as well find someone who will.” Angel let out a bark of laughter
at his own words.
“She is screwing me,” Spike mumbled under his breath, but Angel still heard.
“Wait
a minute, she is having sex with you? Well then you need to tell her to get with the program and decide what she wants. But
until then, find someone else, she has no rights over you.”
Spike stood up to go to his room, mumbling a thanks
to Angel while thinking he had been no help at all.
Buffy groaned; there had been a group of three guys
tormenting her for the last hour. They kept making dumb remarks and playing with her. They had her running back and forth
doing stuff for them since they arrived and Buffy was getting more and more stressed because of it. They kept whispering and
looking at her and laughing. She didn’t know why and it was getting to her. She figured them to be high school age,
well at least one of them anyway. As she took yet another order over to their table the ringleader looked up at her
“Hey
baby, we got a van outside. When you finish you wanna join us?”
Buffy felt repulsed and had to force herself
not to shudder at the mere thought, with a false smile she said “Sorry, not interested.”
“Oh come
on, we’ll have a tonne of fun,” he said.
“No thanks,” as she tried to walk away he grabbed
her
“Come on sweetheart, don’t walk away from me. You look like the kind of girl who has a thing for younger
boys,” as soon as the words left his mouth Buffy felt the blush rise in her cheeks. She wrenched her arm from his grip
and ran out of the restaurant before she could freak out.
Spike grumbled as he went downstairs, someone was
knocking incessantly on the door. He threw it opened and was shocked to see her standing there,
“Buffy.”
Buffy
knocked back another shot of whiskey, making a face and shuddering at the taste. She still didn’t know how she had ended
up here, but after running out of work her feet had just seemed to bring her here, he had invited her in and suddenly she
had found herself telling him everything. About all the crap she felt at the minute and about those guys at the fast food
place. He had told her the best solution was a drink, because it would calm her down, well that one shot had turned into the
two of them sharing a full bottle of whiskey. Well, Buffy had drunk most if it but Spike had had some too.
He watched
her and the face she made after each drink and it made him grin like an idiot. She looked so cute, and he could feel himself
falling deeper. He was happy about the fact that she was actually talking to him; she had never done that before. He smiled
softly as she looked at the empty bottle and pout. He took it from her and sat it on the floor and then decided to take a
chance
“Buffy, I’m in love with you,”
Buffy had been a little tipsy before but she felt sober
now. Her eyes were wide when the words registered, “What?”
“I’m in love with you,” he
repeated, “and I know that you feel something for me. Don’t deny it, you must or you wouldn’t keep coming
back.”
Buffy nodded. She knew that there must be something because she thought about him all the time, “I
do feel something for you, Spike. But I don’t know what it is, or why I feel it. I’ll admit I could fall in love
with you.”
Spike felt like he was flying when he heard her say it, he hadn’t expected it. And he was going
to say something but instead he kissed her, unlike their other kisses it was slow and sweet. When she pulled away she said
“I
said I could. But I won’t, it’s not right Spike.”
“Right and wrong doesn’t matter. Tonight
just let it be,” he leaned in and kissed her again, as slowly as before. But there was that same passion, the same fire
that always burned between them.
Spike laid her back on the bed, kissing his way down her body; he slowly undid
the buttons of her shirt and took it off, throwing it on the floor. He continued downwards, undoing her pants and pulling
them off slowly. After kissing as much of her body as he could, he came back up to kiss her lips. Moaning as their tongues
duelled. She sat up slightly so that he could unhook her bra and send it flying to land with the rest of his clothes. He bent
his head to take one of her nipples in his mouth, sucking gently, while his hand came up to play with the other. After a few
moments, he paid the same attention to the other side, loving the sounds of Buffy moaning at his actions.
When
she couldn’t take it anymore she pulled him up to kiss him again. She pulled his t- shirt over his head, soon followed
by unbuttoning his jeans and pulling them off. Now all of their clothes were in a heap on the floor. Buffy lay down again
this time taking Spike with her. Kissing her again, and murmuring sweet nothings into her skin, he positioned himself at her
entrance and slowly pushed into her.
He gave her a moment before he started to move; he went slowly, wanting it
to last. But more than that he wanted it to be intimate, because although they had had sex before the real emotional intimacy
had been missing, tonight that wouldn’t be the case. He placed kisses all over her face and neck as she moved to meet
his thrusts. She was sighing his name as they rocked together, savouring every touch.
Their movements never quickened,
they simply moved together slowly, letting the feelings build between them. Buffy writhed below him, moaning in pleasure,
he continued to move kissing her and murmuring to her until they tumbled over the edge together.
Spike lay his forehead on hers, kissing her once more before he pulled out of
her. He turned onto his side and pulled her flush against his body and together they fell into peaceful slumber.
Chapter 7
More than a month passed and Buffy had stopped
trying to avoid Spike. She no longer saw the point; she always ended up with him so she decided there was no point in fighting
it. That of course didn’t mean she liked the situation any more than ever, she didn’t. She still knew it was wrong
and wished she could end it but for some reason she just couldn’t. It was like an addiction, she needed him like a drug
addicted needed their next fix. It was all so taboo, but it was the sweetest taboo. She just couldn’t stop. Plus he
was good and bed, and that surprised her considering the fact that ha was only fourteen. And every time she remembered that
she felt worse. But it had just been so long since she had felt so wanted and loved. She could see and feel Spike’s
adoration in every touch and every look. And she craved that feeling; it was what was keeping her going, stopping her from
letting everything pull her under. He was an anchor and she wasn’t ready for him to not be there.
Spike
had been in heaven since that night, the fact that Buffy hadn’t tried to end things again meant a lot. He could tell
she still wasn’t entirely comfortable with it but at least she wasn’t running away. He wasn’t completely
sure why she had the sudden change of heart but he wasn’t going to complain if it kept her in his bed, and more importantly
just with him. That was all he really wanted, just to be with her.
Buffy yawned and sat on the couch. She was so
glad to be home, she had just worked a double shift and now all she wanted to do was sit in front of the television and relax.
It was a bit of a luxury nowadays and she always liked getting the chance to laze around. Just as she was getting into a cheesy
soap opera, Dawn came in. The way she sat on the edge of her seat and fidgeted with her hair gave away the fact that she wanted
to speak about something. So reluctantly Buffy switched off the soap and turned to look at Dawn.
“What’s
the matter?” she asked.
“Um, well, the thing is,” Dawn stumbled over her words as she tried to cut
to the chase, “I, I went to the doctor today. And I know I should have told you and invited you to go but I felt like
I felt like I had to do it alone. Anyway I have to go for my first ultrasound tomorrow. If you wanna go.”
Buffy
nodded in comprehension, she did feel a little hurt that Dawn hadn’t asked her to go, but she had told Dawn she understood
that she had to make her own decisions in the situation so she couldn’t say anything. So she just smiled and said,
“I’d
love to Dawn.”
“The other thing is, I want Spike to go. After all there’s a chance the baby is his
and I want him to be there either way because he is still my friend,” Dawn said quietly, afraid of Buffy’s reaction.
Buffy
didn’t like the idea, at all, “Dawn I don’t think,”
“No,” Dawn broke in “I
want him there, please.”
Buffy just nodded and left the room.
Spike had been surprised
when he had picked up the phone last night and Dawn had been on the other end. Since everything had happened and Dawn had
discovered her pregnancy they hadn’t spent much time together. Spike still hung around with his old crowd but tried
not to cause so much trouble so that he could show Buffy he could be a descent person and Dawn kept to herself. He had tried
not to think about the fact that he might be the father. He had spoken to Dawn a few times since she found out and they still
got on as well as ever but it was daunting. She still had feelings for him and he was in love with her sister and on top of
that she may be carrying his child. It was scary. But when she asked him to go to the ultrasound with her and Buffy, if not
as the father then as her friend he couldn’t tell her no. Because she was still his friend. So he said he would go,
as her friend, and hung up as soon as possible, and for the first time he thought about it.
Buffy paced the
waiting room as she waited for Spike to get there. Dawn had already been taken in and put in a gown and Buffy was outside
so she could show Spike where he had to go. Part of her hoped he wouldn’t show up. She didn’t want today to be
awkward but she knew that it would be. For the first time in a while last night she let herself think about what was going
on. About the fact that she was sleeping with the 14-year-old boy who may be the father of her 14 year old sister’s
child and it freaked her out all over again. Just as she was thinking he wasn’t going to turn up he came walking into
the waiting room. He strolled over to her and she immediately turned and led him towards the room where Dawn was, Spike cleared
his throat as if to speak but before he could Buffy beat him to it
“I don’t want to talk about this now
Spike,” she opened the door to the room and let him in before following him.
Buffy and Dawn and Spike looked
at the ultrasound screen in awe as the doctor pointed out the baby’s arms and legs and then its head. None of them had
ever seen anything like it before; it was amazing. Dawn felt so glad that she had decided to keep the baby in that moment.
Buffy and Spike couldn’t help but steal a glance at each other. A flurry of thoughts and emotions going through their
heads.
Spike thinking how that may be his baby and wishing that it had been Buffy. And Buffy thinking how hard it was
to think of the fact that Spike could be the father. It was strange, but she also thought of how much she still wanted him
and a little triumphant that it was still her Spike wanted and not Dawn. She felt bad for thinking it but she couldn’t
stop herself.
When the doctor had finished and gave them the ultrasound photo’s Dawn dressed and met them
in the hall. They left together and looked at the photos as they walked. Buffy and Dawn cooing over them and Spike feeling
quite uncomfortable. So he told them he had to be somewhere and went his separate way. Because they weren’t paying attention
as the walked Buffy slammed right into someone, she looked up and felt like the wind had been knocked out of her
“Sam,
Riley.”
Chapter 8
Buffy’s head was in a spin as she took in the
sight of the couple standing in front of her. She hadn’t seen them in almost a year when they came to Sunnydale just
after they had gotten married. And Buffy had hoped and prayed it’d been both the first and last time she ever did. But
here they stood in front of her. Happy and smiling and clearly in love.
And it made her heart hurt. It had been
almost two years since her break up with Riley, but seeing him with Sam didn’t hurt any less. She wasn’t sure
if she had been in love with him, but she knew that she could have loved him is she had only let herself. But she had been
afraid; she had shut him out. He had left because she wouldn’t let him in and she regretted not trying. What made it
worse was that Sam was so nice, she had been so excited to meet Buffy, the girl who had broken Riley’s heart but whom
he still cared so much for and spoke highly of. But to Buffy that was like a slap in the face.
As the shock
began to lessen she tried to smile and try and cover up how she was really feeling about seeing them again. She tried to look
bright and cheerful,
“Sam, Riley. Hi, how are you?”
“We’re good. Howe about yourself?”
Riley answered.
“Oh, so so. Been busy, I got a job.”
“That’s great. How about you kiddo?”
he asked Dawn.
“I’m finer and I’m not a kid,” she told him with a scowl firmly in place.
“Of
course she’s not, she’s a beautiful young woman,” Sam corrected her husband.
Riley nodded, “Right,
sorry.” He noticed Dawn holding the pictures and asked, “What you looking at?”
“Nothing,”
Dawn squeaked as she quickly tried to shove the pictures into her bag. But she dropped them and before she had the chance
to grab them Riley bent down and picked them up.
Buffy winced as she looked round and saw the stunned look on her ex
boyfriend’s face.
“Ultrasound pictures,” it was a statement and not a question. “Buffy are
you pregnant?”
Buffy could have laughed at the disbelieving tone in his voice. But before she could answer Dawn
spoke up,
“No. I am.”
Riley paced Buffy’s living room, still trying to comprehend
the news. After Dawn’s announcement, Buffy had herded the group back to the house where they could speak in private.
Although why she wasn’t sure, really it was none of his concern or his business, but she knew he still cared about them
both and wanted what was best for them. So she decided to talk to him about it. He still hadn’t said anything,
“Dawn’s
pregnant,” he said finally.
“Yes,” Buffy nodded.
“How the hell did that happen?”
Dawn
snorted and Buffy raised an eyebrow
“Riley, you’re married. I would hope you know how this happens,”
Dawn scoffed.
“You’re 14. You’re too young to be having… that,” he faltered slightly,
not able to say the words out loud. Dawn wasn’t his sister, but in some way she felt like she was. He had loved Buffy
once and he cared about her family, Dawn was one of that family.
“Oh come on Riley, I’m not the first 14
year- old to sleep with a couple of guys,” Dawn said, annoyed.
“Guys,” he bellowed, “how many?”
“None
of your business,” she spat.
“Maybe not, but I care about you two, Finding out that you’re pregnant
is a bit of a shock.”
“Yeah well guess what Riley, that’s just too bad. You left, you’re not
Buffy’s boyfriend anymore so you don’t have the right to be shocked or upset and give me the third degree. Because
it’s none of your damn business. I’m going out.” Before anyone could object the front door slammed shut.
“I
can’t believe you let her get pregnant,” Riley shook his head, disappointment obvious on his face.
This
made Buffy angry, “I didn’t let her. There wasn’t much I could do since I didn’t know she was sleeping
with anyone.”
“Yeah, well you should have. Obviously you just aren’t fit to take care of her, because
you aren’t doing a very good job of it,” he told her.
“Riley,” Sam gasped.
“Get
out,” Buffy ordered through clenched teeth.
“What?”
“I said get out. Dawn was right;
this is none of your fucking business. You left me so don’t dare come in here and judge my parenting or anything else.
Now get the fuck out,” she growled.
Sam stood and took Riley by the arm, dragging him out of the house.
Buffy
had never been so angry, she wanted to cry or find some way to let the emotion out. Instead of crying she picked up the phone.
Spike
was surprised when Buffy was on the phone so soon after he had left her and Dawn. He wanted to start a conversation but didn’t
get the chance. She kept it short and simple, she said
“Spike, come over.”
Within a minute Spike was
out the door and on his way.
Buffy answered the door, and kissed Spike hard. Upon pulling away soon after she said
“Tell
me you love me.”
“I love you, you know I do,” he told her with nothing but sincerity.
“Tell
me you want me.”
“I always want you, in point of fact-“ he let it trail off as his eyes wandered
the length of her body. And then she was on him.
She kissed him, hard as she pulled his jacket off his shoulders.
His t- shirt quickly followed. She didn’t want to wait any longer than she had to. She let her hands wander around his
chest, feeling his well-defined muscles, for his age he was well muscled. He was definitely fit. She kissed down his neck
and the down his chest, smiling as she heard him groan at the contact, she undid the button of his jeans and pulled them down,
before she took his boots off. He lifted each leg to help her she threw all the items aside and looked at him standing there
naked. Definitely fit for his age, she thought. She trailed more kisses down his belly, looking up at him through hooded eyes,
he was watching her in awe, until she stood up abruptly, he looked surprised and she knew what he had been thinking
“Later,”
she whispered before taking his hand and leading him upstairs.
When they reached her room she quickly shed her
own clothes, then she kissed him again before pushing him onto the bed. She straddled him, looking straight into his eyes
as she sank down on him. She didn’t waste any time in beginning to move rapidly on him, she needed to get rid of the
tension and she need to get rid of it now. She placed her hands on Spike’s chest for leverage. She bounced on him, back
arched slightly as she moaned with pleasure. Spike held onto her hips loosely so that he could meet her thrusts. Suddenly,
she rolled so that he was on top. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he began to pound into her, causing more and much
louder moans to escape. Spike groaned as he felt her nearing completion and when she ached up into him, calling his name as
her muscles around him he joined her in ecstasy.
Spike panted as he tried to catch his breath, he rolled off
her and onto her back.
“Wow,” he said.
“Yeah,” Buffy smiled slightly to herself.
“Wow,”
he repeated causing Buffy to giggle.
“Well it was bloody amazing, luv,” he told her.
“Yeah
it was. But it would be more fun if we could go again,” she gave him a naughty grin.
“I don’t think
I’m quite ready yet,” he told her regretfully.
“Don’t worry, I’ll help with that,”
she said as she disappeared under the covers.
A few hours later Buffy and Spike were startled awake by
a loud banging at the door, Buffy jumped out of bed and looked for something to put on. She found her underwear on the floor
and quickly put it on, followed by her jeans and shirt. She ran downstairs and seeing Spike’s clothes still scattered
around the floor she picked them up and threw them up the stairs for him to get.
She composed herself as best as
possible and answered the door and saw Riley there. Openly hostile she asked him what he wanted,
“I just wanted
to apologise for earlier, I didn’t mean it, I was just shocked.”
“That doesn’t excuse what
you said, that hurt Riley.” She was not going to forgive easily.
“I know and I can’t tell you how
sorry I am, but please forgive me.”
“I-“
“Hey luv, who’s at the door?” Spike
called strolling downstairs clad only in his jeans.
Buffy cringed, she had had hoped he would stay upstairs.
“Who’s
this?” Riley asked, eyeing the teen sceptically.
“I’m her b-“
“Cousin,”
Buffy interrupted, “he’s my cousin.”
“I never knew you had family from England,” Riley
said.
“Neither did I until mom died. They came for the funeral. They liked it and decided to move here,”
she covered and hopes Riley was still dumb enough to believe her.
Spike stood on the sidelines, hurt. After the
afternoon they had just had he had thought maybe she would stop denying who he was. But no, she was still ashamed and after
all he had tried to do to prove himself it hurt.
“Ok,” Riley said simply, “I’ll get going
then. Buffy I really am sorry.”
“Ok, but never say anything like that again.”
“I won’t”
he promised. Buffy ushered him back out of the house. She turned too look at Spike and saw the hurt and anger cross his face
in quick succession,
“Cousin, that’s a good one,” he said angrily.
“Spike, don’t
start, I’m not in the mood.”
“Buffy, you just lied about me again. I’m sick of it, it hurts.”
“Well
if you don’t want me enough to put up with it then why don’t w just finish it and you can go to hell,” she
shouted.
Tears sprung to his eyes, but he never cried and he wasn’t going to start now, “Fine,” he
said coolly he grabbed his t-shirt from where he had left it on the bottom step, he pulled it over his head, took his jacket
and walked out the door.
Chapter 9
Spike walked along the street, still angry
since his argument with Buffy. He could hardly believe that she had done that to him, he had honestly been starting to think
that maybe she wanted to be with him, and that maybe just maybe sooner or later she would admit to people that she was with
him. He could see why see might be worried because of the age thing, but he didn’t think it should matter if they cared
about each other. But apparently the care in that supposed relationship had all been one way, from Spike to Buffy. All she
ever did was make him feel bad, and try and deny that he loved her. His age was always her excuse, but dammit he may be young
but he did know his own mind and she needed to realise that. Not that it mattered, it would seem they were really over this
time. He kept walking, and walking.
Not long after Spike left, Xander, Willow and Anya showed up. She hadn’t
seen them very much because when she wasn’t at work she was with Spike. She tried to seem as cheerful as possible, but
Willow noticed that something was wrong. Well actually, they all did, Willow was just the first one to say so. As Buffy stood
in the kitchen pouring drinks, Willow came in behind her
“You okay, Buff?” she inquired.
Fine,”
Buffy said, in a voice that said she was far from fine.
“Buffy,” Willow said, walking round to look at
Buffy in the eye, “you can tell me.”
“You wouldn’t understand,” Buffy said sadly.
“Try
me.”
Spike seen her from quite a few feet away, just wandering. Spike broke into a jog to catch up
to her
“Hey Dawn,” he called.
She stopped and turned to look at him, smiling slightly
“Hi,
Spike”
“Something wrong?” he asked
“Just been a bad day,” she answered.
“Same
here, want to go my place and talk?” he suggested.
“Sure.”
So they changed direction and waked
to Spike’s. They got there around ten minutes later. Spike opened the door and let Dawn in
“Let’s
go upstairs, I have a bottle of whiskey stashed there and I need a drink.”
Without another word he led her up
the steps.
Buffy sobbed on Willow’s shoulder as she spilled her guts about everything. It felt good to
finally let it all out. Willow hadn’t commented so far, she was just hugging Buffy and being a source of comfort for
her best friend. However, they didn’t realise that Anya had been listening at the door when Buffy had told Willow she
had been seeing someone and she had just ruined it. She had immediately run to tell Xander, so when Buffy had composed herself
a while later, still without comment from Willow they made their way back to the living room.
Xander looked up at her
sombrely, giving her a sad smile.
“I heard you at the door, I told Xander, sorry,” Anya told her sheepishly.
Buffy was terrified, she didn’t know how much Anya had heard therefore she had no idea how much she had told Xander.
“Yeah,
Buffy. I’m sorry,” Xander said sincerely.
“Thanks,” Buffy sat down on the seat in the corner.
“Did
you want things to end?” Xander asked.
“No, I don’t know,” Buffy admitted.
“Look,
Buffy, if you liked this guy, cared about him. If you thought you could love him don’t give him up that easily. I know
it’s easy to be afraid of love, I’ve been there,” he spared a look at Anya, “but Buff, don’t
let the fear stop you from being happy. Because you deserve your happiness, and if you think this guy could be the one, then
go after him. Make him listen and make him love you.”
Buffy stood up and went across to thee couch, she leaned
down and kissed Xander.
“Thanks,” she whispered. That was all she said, because no sooner had he said it
than Buffy was gone from the house.
“Buffy, don’t-” Willow yelled in protest.
“Willow
why try and stop her?” Xander asked, bewildered.
“Because it’s Spike. He’s 14 years old,”
the redhead shrieked.
The next minute the three friends were running down the road after Buffy.
Spike
swigged back another mouthful of whiskey.
“So, Dawn, your sister is a bitch,” he stated.
“Yep,”
she agreed.
“And I mean, who does she think she is, treating me like dirt. I mean-“
“I know,
she thinks you’re so horrible because I slept with you and now I’m pregnant and the baby might be yours, but god
she needs to get over it. Just because I managed to find a man who’s good in bed.”
Spike laughed out loud
and then he kissed her. Dawn kissed him back urgently, and instead of pulling back like he knew he should, Spike began undressing
her.
Buffy didn’t stop running until she reached Spike’s place. But instead of knocking on the
door she tried it and found it unlocked. So she walked right in. There was no sign of Angel so she guessed Spike would be
upstairs.
She walked up the steps as quietly as possible, wanting to surprise him. She tip- toed along the hall
to his bedroom door, she thought she heard something but put it down to the television. Deciding not to knock, she quietly
turned the handle and pushed the door open, she regretted it immediately. She gasped and brought a hand to her mouth at the
sight that greeted her, Spike and her sister, naked in bed. It was like deja- vu, except this time there wasn’t a third
party. Buffy felt sick to her stomach. When the door opened Spike jumped up and looked at her horrified,
“Buffy,”
he started.
“No,” she said, “just don’t even try and explain this to me.”
“What
the hell are you doing here?” Dawn yelled.
Buffy closed her eyes, hoping that maybe when she opened them again
this wouldn’t be happening. No such luck though. And things only got worse as the next moment, Willow, Xander and Anya
stormed up the stairs. They came to an abrupt stop behind Buffy and upon seeing what was happening in the room, the only thing
said by Xander was
“Whoa.”
Spike rushed over to Buffy
“I’m sorry, I am so
sorry. I didn’t mean it, please forgive me, and don’t hate me. I’m so sorry,” he begged.
“How
could you?” she whispered.
“What does it have to do with you who he sleeps with?” Dawn shouted, annoyed
and still unaware of the reasons.
Ignoring her, Spike went on “I don’t know. I was upset, I was angry.
I didn’t mean for it to happen. I saw Dawn and she was upset too and we were still friends and I thought we could talk.
But then I had a few drinks and it just happened. But I swear, it didn’t mean anything, Buffy I love you. I love you
so much,” he kissed her forehead, and then peppered more kisses across her face. But she pulled back
“Spike,
saying sorry won’t make this better.”
“I know but I love you,” he told her, and then he shouted
it louder, “I’m in love with you. Buffy Summers.”
Dawn couldn’t believe what she was hearing,
“What?” she screamed.
But again they ignored her as Spike kept talking, spilling his guts, his soul to
Buffy.
“Buffy, being with you is all I want. Every time I’m with you, I feel like I’m in
heaven. I know I’m just a kid in your eyes, and I did some stupid things, but at my age that’s what we do. We
make mistakes. But I tried to do better because e I was with you and I wanted to be better so maybe you would love me too.”
“Well,
you got your wish. I came here to tell you that I thought I was falling in love with you, but I can’t say it now. Because,
I can’t get over this.” Buffy’s voice was sad as she said it.
Dawn finally sick of not being
answered wrapped the sheet around herself and got off the bed. Stomping over to them
“You slept with my sister,”
she said angrily, “and you,” she directed at Buffy, “slept with the 14 year- old boy I’ve had a crush
on since he moved here. How could you two do this to me?” she cried.
“Dawnie, I’m sorry. It happened,
I can’t take it back,” Buffy told her.
“And I don’t want to,” Spike said.
“Neither
do I,” Buffy admitted quietly, “but that doesn’t change anything.”
Spike went to say something
else but never got the chance as another voice thundered up the stairs as someone else joined the party
“Hey
Spike, guess what? We’re moving,” Angel declared. Stopping dead when he saw the scene in front of him. And then
he roared with laughter,
“So, this is the girl you’re in love with. Dawn Summers, stalker of the year.”
“No,”
Spike growled.
“Then why is she naked in your room?” his brother asked.
“It was a mistake,”
Spike stated simply.
“Yeah, I was a poor substitute for my sister,” Dawn said angrily.
“Wait,
you were sleeping with her?” Angel pointed at Buffy.
Spike nodded,
“Oh that’s rich. The one
who couldn’t stand you couldn’t wait to get in your pants.” He then walked right over to Buffy, getting
in her face, “and Miss Summers, I do believe you did something bad. After all it is illegal for a grown woman to sleep
with a 14 year- old kid. You could get in trouble,” he mocked.
Tears sprang to Buffy’s eyes, but Spike
quickly defended her
“Leave her alone Angel. I was the one who kept going back, I wouldn’t leave her alone.”
“Don’t
worry, I’m not going to do anything. Just answer me, is she a good fuck?”
Spike pushed his brother against
the wall, “don’t dare talk about her like that.”
Angel pushed Spike away, “It doesn’t
matter anyway. Cordy got a job, we move in two days. Now all of you get out of my house.”
As Buffy turned to
leave, Spike tried once more
“Buffy, I love you. I’m sorry.”
Her answer was simple, “Me
too.”
Chapter 10
Buffy had been thinking a lot since that day.
Spike
had tried to talk to Buffy; he had come to her house numerous times a day hoping to speak to her. She never answered the door.
The hurt was too raw and she couldn’t look at him. So he had left with Angel and Cordy, where to Buffy didn’t
know. He had left a letter in her mailbox, she hadn’t opened it. But she didn’t throw it away either. She had
put it in a box and tucked it away at the back of a closet, maybe eventually she would read it, but at the minute it was just
too hard.
He had been gone for almost three weeks. And she did miss him, she had hardly spoken to Dawn. Or more
accurately, Dawn refused to speak to her. Buffy could see that she had really hurt her sister, but she also knew that she
had never meant to. But Dawn didn’t want to see that, and Buffy could live with that. Because after all, Dawn was 14,
she was supposed to hold grudges and it would hurt to know that they boy you really liked was seeing your sister. She only
hoped she would get over it eventually.
She had tried to fill as much of her time as possible with work. She worked
double shifts and did whatever possible so that her mind didn’t have to spend all it’s time thinking about one
thing. Not that it did much good.
She hadn’t been feeling very well the past couple of weeks, and working around
all that greasy food didn’t help at all. She was constantly taking breaks to run to the bathroom. She had thought, hoped
that it was stress and the fact that she had been run down lately. But as the days passed she didn’t think so anymore.
She
had spent some time with Willow, being gay Willow understood what it was like to be in a relationship that a lot of people
didn’t understand. It helped her to know that her friend was there for her, to support her. Because she needed her so
much, she felt so alone. And Willow was there with her today.
As Buffy looked down at the object in her hand, tears
sliding down her face. Willow held onto her other hand, letting Buffy know she was there for her. Buffy looked down, and watched
the plus sign appear. And all she could do was utter one word,
“Pregnant.”
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