Forever Lost In You

Lessons In Love
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What's Mine is Yours

Buffy Summers is Failing high school, her mom gets her a tutor, a hot college boy called Spike.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, all belong to Joss and ME.




Chapter 1: Failure



Buffy stares at disbelief at the piece of paper in her hands. She doesn’t know how the information on the page can be right


“Hey Buff” called out a redheaded girl behind her “how’d you do?”
Buffy sighed and handed the paper to the other girl, and she could tell by the look on the other girl’s face that they were sharing the same thoughts.



Buffy Summers is 16 years old and attends Sunnydale high school. She has long blonde hair and striking green eyes. She is very pretty, and an ex-cheerleader. Buffy has never been the best student and that piece of paper just confirmed her worst fears. She hadn’t been doing great in school lately, she just didn’t have the focus. She was at that stage where she had no real interest in school. She had had a lot of problems since the divorce of her parents a year and a half earlier and ever since a lot had gone down hill. As she sat in class she knew her mother would not be happy when she saw that piece of paper, she had been trying harder recently but it hadn’t work, she couldn’t help but think that she was in a lot of trouble.


Buffy was snapped out of her daydream at the sound of the bell signalling the end of class and the end of the school week. As she reached the door she waited outside for her friend to come out.

Willow Roseburg, the complete opposite of Buffy as far as school was concerned. Willow was a genius, she did well in all of her classes and had straight A’s. She was the one everyone went to when they were having troubles in school. However, she was also considered a nerd and so was easily taken advantage of. She had long red hair and green eyes and was tall. She tried to be nice to everyone, and rarely said anything bad about anyone, never sticking up for herself against mean comments. But, she was the nicest person Buffy had met here and her best friend. Along with Alexander or Xander Harris. He was tall, with brown hair and eyes, and was relatively handsome. He had a crush on Buffy for some time, but she only liked his as a friend. He was another person that she could talk to about anything, he as like her brother, however he was out of school today for an appointment so that left just Buffy and Willow.



“Willow” she started as soon as her friend came through the door “what am I going to do? My mom will kill me” she panicked



“Buff, I’m sure it’ll be fine” her friend comforted

“No, will, my mom told me I was in trouble if I didn’t pull my grades up this term and look at this report card. I failed three of my classes and I got C’s in the others. Will I really tried but look it didn’t work” she was obviously upset as they made their way down the hall towards the main doors of the school. Her friend put a comforting arm around her all the while trying to reassure her


“Buffy, I’m sure if you just explain to your mom she’ll understand”

“No” sniffed Buffy “she won’t. You know how stubborn she can be with these things, she will be so mad. She thinks I don’t try and I have no way to prove that I did.”

“Well, we’ll figure something out on the way home” Willow assured her.


The rest of the way home Buffy and Willow discussed her grades and ways that she could try and improve. But while it made her feel a little bit better, she also knew that it wouldn’t be enough for her mom. She had high expectations of her and her sister Dawn who was smart and pulled good grades. Buffy always felt like the disappointment and today wouldn’t be any different. Buffy walked up the drive to her house a few minutes after leaving Willow. She opened the door to her house and took a deep breath, she saw her mother as soon as she walked into the kitchen. She could tell she had seen her report card and knew what was coming


“Buffy Summers, get in here now and sit down” Joyce Summers demanded.
Buffy sighed but did as she told and went over and sat at the table across from her mother.

“Mom, I’m sorry I”

“No” her mother interrupted “Buffy, I told you that I wanted you to make an effort in your studies this semester and you obviously haven’t” she fumed “I also told you that unless I saw an improvement on you report card there would be consequences and I meant that”

“Mom” Buffy pleaded

“Buffy, I made up my mind. Something has to be done”
Buffy knew there was no point arguing, and nodded her head solemnly waiting for her mother to go on, she couldn’t think of anything to say.

“Buffy, there is a boy that I know through a friend of mine who is his father. He will be tutoring you at least three nights a week starting tomorrow”
Buffy opened her mouth to protest but Joyce simply put a hand up to stop her while shaking her head

“We will not argue about this Buffy. It is not up for discussion. He will tutor you until I see an improvement and also when I think enough work has been done. You’ll just have to get used to it Buffy”
Buffy was annoyed, she had tried but her mom wouldn’t even listen to her explanation. She resigned herself to the fact that from now on three nights a week she would be living in what she considered hell. But she couldn’t argue with her mother. She nodded her head and stood up, walking out of the room and upstairs to call Willow.



On the phone she poured out her anger, telling her friend how much she was angry that her father wouldn’t even listen to anything that she had to say. She was upset that her mother didn’t listen when she tried to explain anything. On the phone over the next hour she poured her heart out over everything that had been bothering her and also shed some tears. Willow listened sympathetically, knowing that was all she could do as she didn’t really understand where Buffy was coming from. But she was always there with a comforting word, and a hug if it was needed. Buffy hung up the phone, not really feeling any better, but feeling like there wasn’t as much as a burden. And finally ready to accept what was going to have to happen the next day.


Chapter 2: Lesson the First



The next day Buffy sulked in her room until mid-day, trying to prove something to her mother but going about it the wrong way. She had decided this was the only way to show how unhappy she was at the situation as Joyce wouldn’t allow her to tell her. But sulking wouldn’t work, Joyce easily went about her usual business, ignoring her daughter’s bad mood. She was aware that she was trying to draw attention to her dislike of the circumstances, but she wouldn’t be affected by it. She was determined to stand her ground. Buffy stayed in her room with her music blaring, deliberately trying to annoy her mom. She was resolute that she wasn’t going to make the situation easy. She wasn’t going to make any effort. And she was being tutored for a guy, so she wouldn’t make it easy on him either. At around noon she started looking through her wardrobe for her most eye catching outfit. No, she wouldn’t make it easy on him at all.


She was due to meet her tutor at two at the library so at 1.30 after taking one last look in the mirror, to make sure she had gotten the desired effect, she went downstairs and straight out the front door, ignoring her mother’s call behind her.


Joyce had watched her daughter leave in horror, she was dressed like she was going to a party and she had a feeling that she was up to something. Buffy did not even know the name of her tutor, but she had told him what Buffy looked like. He’d find her.


Buffy stood bored outside the door of the library, checking her watch every few minutes. He wasn’t due to meet her for another few minutes. She took a seat on a low wall, and looked at the people walking around. There were a lot of kids walking around with backpacks, but she figure they were mostly high school kids. But there were a few who looked about college age and she checked out the guys as they walked by. She noticed a group of guys and another boy walking a bit behind them. The group looked like they were athletes, they were all tall. Broad shouldered and had those all American looks that all jocks seemed to have. They were the typical guys that she saw every day. The other guy wasn’t there anymore but she had noticed a little bit about him. He was average height and of lean build with bright blonde hair. He had been dressed all in black, and he was ok looking. Buffy was distracted when she felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up into the face of the black clad figure. Forget alright looking she decided, he was hot.

“You Buffy?” he questioned, she nodded in response and her spoke again

“Well then, looks like I’m tutoring you” he informed her

“uh, ok” she spluttered and thought ‘yeah good one Buff, make your self look like a bumbling idiot’
“Ok well, I’m William Giles. Just don’t call me that, call me Spike everyone who isn’t a parent or old does” he held his hand out for to shake and she willingly complied.


Spike had noticed her straight away, her mother had described her well, but he thought she was even more beautiful, if a little overdressed. When he introduced himself he thought it was sweet how all of a sudden she seemed tongue tied, she had seemed so confident when he first noticed her

“Well, we should probably get started” he told her

“Ok, yeah, guess you’re right” she agreed walking towards the library doors

“hey” he called out “do you wanna do this elsewhere. I hate the library and you have your stuff” he suggested to her

She smiled and started walking towards him again “Ok. Where do you wanna go?”

“Um, well, there’s a coffee house nearby. It’s quiet enough but we can talk there properly about stuff, how about that?”


“Sure, sounds good” she concurred

They walked in silence for about fifteen minutes until Spike stopped and told her they were at the coffee place. He held the door open to let her in and followed behind her. He led her over to a booth in the corner and sat down, she sat across for him and awaited instructions on what was to come

“Ok” he started “well, I guess your mum told you that I’m tutoring you three days a week, we just firstly need to decide which days are going to work out best” Buffy suddenly noticed that he spoke with a thick English accent, she had been so nervous earlier that she hadn’t noticed

“Well, any day is ok for me really, I don’t exactly have much to do” she told him

“Well, how about Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Probably best days for me” he asked

“Sure that’ll work”

“Ok” he nodded “well we should get started, where’s your stuff?”
He watched as Buffy pulled out a large file folder that was surprisingly well organised, and lay it on the table. She saw his look and decided to explain

“I made more effort than my mom thinks I did this semester. I’m just not good in school. I tried but it didn’t work. It wasn’t good enough” she sighed and pushed the folder towards him and he picked it up and flipped through.

“Well, we should start by putting everything in order, alphabetical, just because it’s easier to handle. Then you’ll have to tell me which classes you’re doing bad in”
She snorted and told him

“Well that’s easy, I failed three and got C’s in the others”

”Ok” he looked a bit confused her notes all looked good he didn’t see how she could be doing so badly “Well, which ones did you fail”

“Um history, World Civ and Spanish”

“Ok, so that leaves English, Chemistry and Math” he only nodded “alright then, well I was ok with most of these, not great but ok, we should be able to get your grades up”

“Cool, I need to do better or my mom will go crazy”

“Well we’ll get there” he assured her “but if we are gonna we should get to work, let’s start with history” he pulled out her history notes and saw that they were studying world war two “ok, let’s get started. I’m gonna give you a short quiz, get to know what you’ve learned then we’ll know what we have to cover”

“Ok, where did Hitler invade first and when did it happen?” was the first question

“The Rhineland in March 1936” she answered easily

“Ok good” he praised “What was the name given to the take over of Austria and when was it?”

“The Anschluss in April 1938, but it was the second attempt” she answered
Spike was impressed she seemed to know her stuff

“Ok what treaty was signed that gave Hitler power over a certain part of Czechoslovakia what part was it?”

“Uh” she was finding this part more difficult “um he was given the Sudetanland but I just can’t think of the treaty” she fretted

“That’s ok” he reassured “it seems to me that you know the basics, but that the events are a little confused, so that’s what we’ll work on. So we’ll start with the Rhineland ok” he waited until he saw her small nod of agreement before he started a commentary on the invasion

“Nazis remilitarised the Rhineland in 1936, it was done on a weekend when no political action would be taken. Nothing was done because the Rhineland was technically German territory that had been taken from them after the previous world war. It was said that they were only walking into their own backyard and so…” he continued for fifteen minutes. Buffy seemed to pay attention for the first ten, but then he noticed the bored look in her eyes. He stopped what he was saying and looked at her

“You really don’t want to be here do you pet?”

“I’m sorry, it’s just that I’ve tried to get this stuff and it doesn’t work and my mom won’t listen to me. I tried to do better but everything just gets mixed up and my mom doesn’t care about the reasons why my work went downhill in the first place” she rambled on and Spike just sat patiently and let her spill it all out. When she finished he spoke softly to her

“Look pet, I know where you’re coming from. I went through a stage of not caring myself. I went downhill, rebelled after my mum and dad split up. I was left with dad but he’s hard to talk to, doesn’t understand how I felt. He was always sort of closed off, I took it all hard and probably made it harder on him. I came close to failing out of school because I just stopped caring”

She nodded her head, listening intently to what he had to say

“So, I’ll make a deal with you” he continued “you strike me as someone who’s bright and could do well with a bit of help. I think I understand how you’re feeling. So, if you will try this tutoring thing, put some effort in, I’ll listen if you ever need to talk. We’ll even put a half hour on to the tutoring time just so we can talk” he promised

“Sounds good, but I don’t think my mom will pay the extra” she warned

“Don’t worry, it’ll be on the house” he smirked and she let out a small laugh “Now, I need to know. Why are you wearing that? You had something planned didn’t you?” he prodded

Buffy suddenly remembered what she was wearing and blushed a little

“Uh, yeah, kind of” he laughed and waited for her to go on, but she didn’t

“Oh come on, you can’t leave it there” he said

“Alright” she said grudgingly “ I had decided that I was gonna make it hard on you, so I wore this” he stared at her and she exclaimed

“What? I own a mirror I know I don’t look too bad”
He shook his head disbelievingly, all of a sudden there was the confidence that he knew was there somewhere and he thought it was great

“Well then” he looked at her sternly “let’s get back to work”

Buffy sat back in her seat and looked at him as he started telling her the details he had started before while she took some more notes at the same time, she was surprised that the next hour passed very quickly.

Chapter 3: Family Issues





The following Monday after school Buffy and Willow walked down the school steps, they hadn’t had a chance to talk over the weekend or at school that day as Willow had been out at a debate for most of the day. They waited for Xander to come out so that Buffy could share the details of her first tutoring session with them both, While they were waiting, the two girls gossiped between themselves. Xander showed up a few minutes later calling to them from the top of the steps

“Hello, and how are my two favourite girls today?” he ran down the steps to meet them, putting an arm over each girl’s shoulder. “So, ladies, any new news for the Xan man?”
The two girls laughed at him, Xander always had the ability to make them laugh. He was the one they always turned to when they needed cheering up

“Buffy was just going to tell us all about her new tutor” Willow announced

“Tutor, what tutor? I never heard anything about a tutor” the boy exclaimed

“Calm down Xan, I failed a few classes and my mom got me a tutor. Some son of a guy she knows” Buffy explained to her baffled friend

“Guy” Xander exclaimed again

“Yes” she laughed “he’s a guy. He goes to UC Sunnydale”

“Ok, I don’t like this. He’s not only a guy, he’s a college guy. This is so not fair” he complained
Willow patted on the back and attempted to comfort him

“Don’t worry Xander, the college guy isn’t going to steal your girls.”

“Promise” the young redhead almost melted when he looked at her with his big, brown, puppy dog eyes. It was well known to everyone other than Xander that Willow had been completely head over heels for Xander for years. But the boy was oblivious, and Willow had always been too shy to do anything about it.

“I promise”

“Good” he said with a small smile

“Ok, now back to my cute new tutor” she watched as Xander’s eyes seemed to bulge out of his head
“Cute, since when is he cute?”
They walked out of the school gates and turned in the direction of their homes

“Since he’s cute” Buffy stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world “you should see him. He has bleached blonde hair, amazing, sharp cheekbones, and oh my god, he has the bluest eyes I have ever seen. And he’s English. His accent is so sexy.” She babbled

“Whoa, wait a minute, I don’t think you being tutored by a sexy college guy is a good idea. I mean they’re only after one thing. I know their type” Xander warned her, but she only laughed at him again. It was time like this that is crush on her was still evident. He never liked it when she talked about boys and always found something that had to be wrong

“Xander, you have no idea what type he is” Buffy scolded “he’s a nice guy. He could see that I didn’t want to be there and he knew why. He talked to me about it. He treated me like an actual person, and listened to me. Plus he’s really smart. We have a deal, he knows what I’m going through because he’s been there. So, if I make a real effort, he’ll listen to me. If I need to talk at the end of the session, he’ll be there to talk to me. He’s really cool” she looked happy about this but Willow looked rejected. Buffy noticed and rushed to reassure her

“Wills, I still need you to talk to, I’ll always tell you stuff, but he’s been there so I think that it’ll help to talk to him too. And he treats me like I’m smart. He’s a good guy” Willow nodded, now with a small smile, feeling more secure that Buffy still needed her to listen

“He sounds great Buff. So when do you have your sessions with him?” the other girls questioned

“Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday afternoons. So, my next session is tomorrow.”

“Cool, maybe I could come to the library with you and meet him, before I meet my mom” Willow said

“That would be great but we don’t meet at the library”
The other two looked puzzled at the revelation. Willow was sure that Buffy had told her the sessions were going to happen in the library. Buffy, once again seeing the strange looks explained

“We meet at this little coffee house on main street. It’s small and a lot of kids hang and study there”

“No, Buff, I don’t like this” Xander objected “why would he want to study in a coffee house”

“Because, we can talk there while we work, instead of having to be quiet like in a library. Stop worrying Xan” Buffy couldn’t help but think that the big brother act, or over protective boyfriend act was getting old. Especially considering he was neither of those things. It would be different if she had given him reason to worry, but she hadn’t. They walked in silence until they reached Xander’s street and said their goodbyes before she and Willow continued on their way.

“So, Buff, gonna make a move for the hot college guy?” Willow looked at her friend with a smirk before bursting into laughter

“I don’t know. I don’t think so. He wouldn’t want a high school girl. But I’ll try and be friends with him. Better than nothing”

“Yeah” Willow agreed “but you never know what’ll happen. See you tomorrow Buff” Buffy saw that they had reached her street and mumbled a goodbye to Willow, running up the street to her house. She wanted to do some studying so that she was prepared for the next days lesson.



The next day before she left for school her mom called her into the kitchen. They hadn’t really spoken since the previous Friday when they had argued about Buffy having a tutor, and Joyce had some thing that she wanted to speak to her daughter about. She hadn’t had the opportunity to speak to Mr Giles to find out if William had said anything about how the session went, but having seen how Buffy was dressed when she left the house, she had a fair idea at what may have occurred. Joyce seemed to think Buffy had been with a few boys since she started Sunnydale high school, in actual fact it had been one boy, one time. But Joyce thought, because Buffy liked certain clothes that there must be more to it. Buffy hated the fact that her mother had so little trust in her. She had had a rough time in the past few years and she had done some other stuff, but she had some principles and she hadn’t gone against them. However, her mother once again had failed to actually speak to her about it, only assume. Joyce waited at the kitchen table for her daughter come down and sighed when she came into the kitchen at what she was wearing.


Buffy saw the way her mother looked at her as soon as she entered the room, and she felt her heart break a bit. She wanted her mother to accept her, to take her as she was. But, it didn’t seem like that would ever happen.

“Buffy sit down” Joyce instructed. Buffy did as she was told and had a feeling of déjà vu. This was how their previous conversation had started on Friday. Buffy had a bad feeling about this.

“Buffy, how did your session go?” she questioned

“Fine” the teen mumbled
“Buffy, I’m not in the mood for this today. I want to talk to you about this” her mother’s tone was stern and warning. Buffy looked at her and nodded

“So, what happened?”

“We went over history and we talked a bit, then we ordered coffee and studied some more”
Joyce was confused

“You ordered coffee in the library?”

“No, we ordered coffee in the coffee house where we went to study”

“Buffy your sessions are supposed to take place in the library, that is what I arranged. However from the way you were dressed I could tell things were not going to happen as planned” she said

Buffy looked hurt at that, what did her mother think of her, she knew she didn’t trust her but she seemed to be presuming that Buffy was some sort of slut and that hurt more than anything.

“What is that supposed to mean?” she yelled jumping from her seat

“It means Buffy that I am not as naïve to what you get up to as you seem to think” Joyce yelled back

“I am not doing anything” Buffy cried indignantly, she knew it was the truth but she wanted her mother to believe it too. Joyce only rolled her eyes, she didn’t believe it

“Buffy, I’m not stupid, the way you dress, and behave, I’m not stupid. What happened. Did you manage to persuade William to take you back to his place after your session or did you just take him up some side alley”
Buffy felt like she had been slapped and her eyes welled with tears, her mother seemed angry but unaffected at her daughter’s obvious hurt

“When will you ever listen to me and trust me” Buffy said before turning and running out, straight out the front door and all the way to school. She was so upset that she avoided her friends all day. She couldn’t face anyone after what had happened that morning. Relief washed over her at the sound of the final bell, she went outside and headed in the direction of main street. She really needed that talk Spike had promised her.

Chapter 4: A shoulder to lean on




Buffy walked into the coffee house and looked around to see if Spike was there yet. He wasn’t so, she walked over to the same booth as last time. Ordering an herbal tea from a passing waitress in the hope that it would calm her down a little. She had been on edge all day, re running the argument in her mind. Every time that her mom’s words came back to her a fresh flood of tears had welled behind her eyes. So far, she had managed to keep them at bay. Barely. She looked at her surroundings to pass the time. She hadn’t noticed the previous Saturday how small and intimate it was. There were a couple of sofa’s sitting near the counter, a few booths along one side and a few tables scattered around. Most of the customers seemed to be college aged, with some older people coming in and out. It was very cosy and inviting. The waitress returned and sat the tea down, Buffy never looking up. She took out her books so that everything was set for when Spike came in. When that was done it was back to thinking about the argument. And the tears welled up again.



Spike noticed that Buffy was upset as soon as he spotted her sitting at the booth. He felt an urge to put his arms around her, but there was that niggling part that kept reminding him how inappropriate that would be. He stood where he was for a few minutes watching the conflicting emotions that seemed to be fighting to be the overall emotion. Slowly, he made his way towards her, watching her all the way. He wanted to know what was wrong but knew that if she wanted him to know then she would tell him later. After all that was the deal. He fixed a normal look on his face as if he hadn’t noticed anything wrong and approached the table

“Hey Buffy”
Her head snapped up at the sound of his greeting and she fixed a plastic smile on her face, hiding all traces of her previous upset.

“Hi Spike”

“So how was school today?” he asked her as he took a seat across from her in the booth

“Okay actually” she lied “I actually understood what my history teacher was talking about”

“Good. So what are we studying today?”

“Well I have to give an oral presentation in Spanish on Thursday, thought it might be a good idea to cover that” was her suggestion. She had known about it for weeks and Willow had helped her write it. She just needed to practice it, and she wanted something easy for today, she didn’t feel up to working on something new.

That’s a good idea” he nodded in agreement “have you written it yet?”

“yeah”

He reached for her folder where everything was “Is it in here?”

“Yeah” she repeated

Spike flipped through the folder until he came to the Spanish section and noticed a few essays “Which one is it?”

“The one on vacations”

“Ok” he took the sheet of paper out and looked over it quickly “this looks good. Did you work on it for long?”

“Well we found out about it a couple weeks ago, so my friend helped me write it, I just haven’t had a chance to practice it yet”

“That’s fine. We can do that today” he handed her the sheet of paper “Just read over it for a few minutes and I’ll go order a drink. You want anything?”

Buffy looked down at her now cold tea “Another herbal tea please”

“Ok, I’ll be back in a minute”

Buffy watched as he walked away and then lowered her head to scan over the piece of paper in her hands. The words seemed to blur into one another. The way she felt today nothing was making any sense. Everything was just one big blur. She kept reading until she felt Spike place a mug in front of her. She looked up at him, giving a small smile of thanks, before placing the sheet of paper down in front of her.


“Ready to start?” he questioned “you can use the paper the first couple times”

“Ok, here goes” Buffy took a deep breath and lowered her eyes to the paper, quickly scanning the words.

Spike sat waiting patiently for her to start, he had noticed that it always worked better when people let him do things when he was ready school- wise so he figured it would be the same in this situation. He took a sip of his coffee while he waited. He could tell she was having trouble, but knew that she had to be left to it. So he continued to wait and eventually she started
“Durante las vacaciones” she started tentatively “pase dos semanas en Espana con mi amiga y no lo olvidare nunca. Nos alojamos en un piso cerca de la playa.
Viajamos en avion porque es mas rapido y comodo pero es bastante caro. Hay un vuelo directo de Sunnydale a Espana. De todas maneras fue un viaje agredable sin problemas. Nos alojamos en un piso co aire acondicionado y lo es necesitan. Hay un piscina en el jardin con flores y arboles por todas portes. El piso era a la vaz amplio y moderno. Ibamos a la playa todos las dias. Tambien, a veces durante el dia nos gustaba pasear en el parque y tomando un refresco uno de sus bares al aire libre. Por la tarde ibamos de juerga descumbriendo la vida nocturno. A veces nos gustaba comer an un restaurante, la comida Espanola es muy rica. No cabe duda de que ha sido la mejor experiencia de mi vido y merece la pena hacerla porque tienes la oportunidad de conocer otras culturas, estar con gente extranjeras de tu edad, practicar idiomas y lo mas importante pasarlo bien. Si pudiera la volveria ahacer manana.”


When she finished she looked up, she saw Spike watching and listening intently and blushed a little. When she finished Spike looked up at her with a smile.

“That was good” he praised her “a few pronunciation errors but we can fix that. If you can manage to learn that for Thursday then you should do well” He held out his hand for Buffy to give him the paper, when she did so he proceeded to immediately read what was written.


Buffy was heaven for those few moments. She thought that he couldn’t have sounded any sexier than he did when he spoke with his regular accent, but she had been mistaken. He had a great Spanish accent and spoke the language well. His voice was smooth and sexy. She could listen to it for hours she decided. She hardly even noticed that he had finished.

“Did you hear those changes?” he questioned breaking her out of her daydream. She jumped a little but covered her surprise by smiling at him and answering his question

“Yeah, I’ll try and remember them”

”Ok, well, here you go. Why don’t you have another shot”

She took the sheet again and began to read the words trying to commit them to memory as she went along. She could vaguely remember some changes when Spike had been reading and tried to include them in the right places. She read the whole thing through twice, one after the other and by that time she felt she could remember it. She placed the paper down with the words facing the table deciding to give it a shot without reading. She looked at Spike for confirmation that it was ok to do so, he only shrugged leaving the decision up to her. She had to do it when she was ready.

“I think I can remember it. I’ll give it a shot”
H nodded and waited for her to start, she was right, she remembered the words almost completely with only a couple of mistakes. She smiled excitedly when she was through

“Oh my gosh, I have never memorised anything that quickly before” she squealed in her excitement leaning over to hug Spike. He responded by patting her back briefly but not allowing himself to really return the hug. If he did it would be too easy to get carried away and that would be bad. When she pulled away he flashed her a smile and congratulated her

“Well done, you did good. You’ve obviously been working”

“It’s because of you. You don’t force me to get it right then and there, that helps”

He smiled again, feeling flattered that she thought he really helped her “Well I’m glad you are starting to get it. Your smart”

Buffy blushed again. She wasn’t used to the compliments. Her mom thought she was dumb and her sister loved to tell her that she was. It felt good to have someone as smart as Spike think otherwise

“Thanks”

“So our hour is up” he announced “how about that talk?”

“I’d like that£” she told him

“Cool. So I’ll go get us some more drinks, these are finished. Same again?”

“Um no I’ll have a latte with caramel syrup, please” she requested

“No problem. Be right back”

Buffy put her things back in her bag while she waited and thought about whether or not to tell him about that morning’s argument. She knew that he probably wouldn’t judge her but she wasn’t sure if that was a bit too personal a topic. She decided as she saw him on his way back that she wouldn’t tell him. She couldn’t face it. He sat down again and pushed her drink towards her.

“So how have things been since Saturday?” he started the conversation with what he thought would be a neutral, he had no idea what a can of worms it potentially was that had just been opened.

Buffy smiled a fake smile and spoke “Ok, I guess. Really just the usual. Had a few rows with mom, but that’s nothing out of the ordinary. I told my friends about our first session”

“Cool”

“Yeah, Xander doesn’t really like the idea of my being tutored by a guy, especially a college guy” she finished with a laugh

Spike tried to look cool as he asked the next question “Xander, is that your boyfriend?”

“Xander?” she exclaimed “A world of no. He’s my best friend. He has a crush on me, but I only like him as a friend. He just gets jealous and overprotective sometimes”

“Well, that’s a good thing. At least you know he cares”

“Yeah I guess” she sighed “it’s just that sometimes it gets old”

“Give him a break. He just cares about you”

Buffy looked down at her watch and sighed

“Well looks like my half hour is up with doctor Spike. I should go. Spike was shocked, he hadn’t noticed how much time had passed. He stood up gathering his own things as Buffy gathered hers

“I’ll walk you out” he told her

They walked out together and stood by the door to say their goodbyes. Buffy’s cell phone beeped indicating a message. She took read the message ‘Buffy, you should be home by now. Your lesson finished 40 minutes ago. But I can probably guess what you are doing. Get straight home hen you’re finished, we have some talking to do. Mom’ Buffy was fuming. The earlier argument came to her mind again and she decided that she liked Spike and since her mom seemed to think that she was a slut and that she was busy screwing Spike, she may as well do just that. She stuffed her phone in her jacket, looked at Spike and got to work.

“Spike I want to show you something, but not here. Follow me” she turned and walked to the alley at the side of the coffee house and turned up it.

Spike looked puzzled but followed her anyway. He figured it was innocent enough and that she just wanted to talk to him somewhere a bit more privately than the middle of the street. He walked up to her and was taken by surprise when she grabbed the lapels of his jacket and pressed her lips to his. He tried to protest for only a moment before giving in to the kiss. He ran his tongue over her lips begging entrance which she readily granted. Their tongues were locked in a fierce battle. Buffy spun them so that Spike was against the wall. She ran her hand down his chest to place over the growing bulge in his pants. She rubbed up and down softly at first slowly growing in strength and speed. Spike seemed to have lost all sense of reason. He moaned at the sensations running through him, giving himself over to them completely. Buffy trailed kisses down his jaw to his throat. Suddenly Spike seemed to come to his senses and pulled back, ignoring the constant ache of need he was feeling. He wanted her yes, but not like that and he was going to tell her that. Buffy looked at him with a question in her eyes

“What? Don’t you want to?”

“Yes, I think that’s obvious. But Buffy. I don’t want you like this. You’re not that kind of girl” he insisted

“Yes I am” she shouted “everyone seems to think I am”

“Buffy what are you talking about?” he asked softly. She stood away from him and he stepped towards her, begging her with his eyes to tell him. And then the floodgates opened. All the tears she had been holding back started to fall and she started to open her heart and pour her hurt out

“I’m a slut. Or at least that’s what my mom seems to think. Seems to think I’ve been with half of sunnydale. If I wear a certain outfit I must be looking for a good screw because god forbid it could simply be a case of liking the outfit.” She cried


Spike looked at her sympathetically. That explained why she had looked so down when he had saw her sitting at the booth earlier before he had the chance to interrupt she started again

“She seems to think I must be fucking you, after all you are a guy. Thinks it’s my way of getting it easy in these sessions. I sleep with one guy, one time and all of a sudden I’m the town whore. She doesn’t trust me. And it hurts. It hurts so much” she fell to her knees sobbing and Spike went to her, kneeling beside her he wrapped his arms around her soothing her

“You don’t deserve that Buffy. You’re a good person. Don’t let yourself be put down like that.”

“No one cares about me anymore” she whispered

“Yes they do. I care” he whispered in her ear. Holding her close and allowing her to cry as much as she needed.



Chapter 5: A Night With Friends




In the two months since that day in the alley Buffy and Spike had
grown increasingly close. They talked about everything, she knew that
she could tell him anything and she wouldn’t judge. That day he had
walked her home and she had told him all about where her mom had
gotten the idea that she was a slut.


‘It was a year ago, my fifteenth birthday. I had started Sunnydale
High, I was new here and I wanted people to like me. Well, that
didn’t last long because I met Xander and Willow and we just clicked.
I needed real friends, but I did still rebel. My parents had broken
up about six months or so before and I was hurt.” she confided
quietly “I met this guy and he was nice, at least I thought he was.
My friends warned me against him because he was popular but I didn’t
listen. I was so sure he was a good guy.” she couldn’t help but let
out a sarcastic laugh, looking back on it now she couldn’t believe
that she thought so. They spotted a bench and decided to sit for a
moment until she finished.

“So what happened?” he asked.

“Well, we went out for about two months when I was fourteen. On my
fifteenth birthday a girl, popular girl invited me to a party, just
because of Owen. Willow got to go too. It was a sleepover. It was
boys and girls obviously. So rebellious me, thinking I could trust
Owen agreed to go to a separate room with him for a while to make
out. But that’s not exactly how things went”.

Spike’s jaw clenched, he had a vision of what she could say next and
he was afraid to ask, but he couldn’t help himself “Did he..?” he
couldn’t finish the question, unable to say the word.


Buffy looked at him with tenderness in her eyes “No, he didn’t rape
me,” she assured him “but he did manage to persuade me to sleep with
him. He knew exactly what I wanted to hear and I was hurt and wanted
to be loved because at that point I didn’t think I was. To be honest,
I still don’t.”

Spike turned and put his hands on her shoulders, making sure that she
was looking at him.

“Buffy, you are loved. Your mum loves you, I’m sure of it, she just
misunderstands you and has wrong ideas about the kind of girl you
are, but she’s still your mum. She loves you.” he was trying hard to
convince her, and himself too.

She smiled at him “Thank you.” it came out as nothing more than a
whisper but it was most definitely heartfelt.
Nothing more was said, the just stood up and walked the rest of the
way home. Where he met her mom and sister. Joyce looked him up and
down and automatically came to the conclusion that he was no good,
based solely on the clothes that he wore. Dawn, Buffy’s sister liked
him straight away. Joyce walked over to them.

“Buffy Anne Summers you should have been home ages ago.” she said
angrily.

“I’m sorry.” she muttered, eyes facing the ground.

“Mrs Summers,” Spike cut in “that was my fault, I insisted that Buffy
join me for a coffee after her session as a treat. She did really
well today. She deserved it.”

“Well, William, you may think so but she didn’t let me know and that
will not be tolerated.” she told him.

Spike felt compelled to defend the girl again..

“I’m very sorry, I didn’t think. I take full responsibility for it.
But you should know Buffy is very bright”

Joyce was suspicious, what could he know he looked like a thug.

“Yes well, let me ask, what is it that you do?”

“Um, well, I study creative writing and history at UC Sunnydale.” he
informed her “I love to write, I hope to be a writer or a teacher of
English when I get my degree.” he smirked inside knowing exactly what
the woman thought even if she didn’t say it.

After that Joyce’s opinion of him changed drastically and she broke
out into a smile.

“Well that’s wonderful” she gushed “Dawn, come here and meet William.”

The young girl ran over with a wide smile, stopping in front of Spike
she waved a hand at him and Joyce gave the introduction.

“William this is Buffy’s sister Dawn, Dawn this is William.”

“Please call me Spike.” he insisted

Dawn giggled, it was obvious she had a crush on him.

“Hey Spike, I like your hair.” she complimented, a slight blush
rising in her cheeks. Buffy looked on in amusement.

“Thanks bit, well I better get going, I’ll see you the day after
tomorrow Buffy.” he smiled and waved as he walked off in the
direction of his own house.
“Well,” Joyce stated “looks like I was wrong this morning. I highly
doubt William would be interested in you. I think he probably has
higher standards.” she walked away.


Buffy went inside and the tears fell her mother just looked at her
and Buffy had had enough, she snapped.

“Why do you hate me?” she screamed “What could i have possibly done?”

“Don’t speak to me like that Buffy.” Joyce reprimanded her daughter.

“Mom, I don’t get it.” she whimpered.

“Well then let me explain. You dress like a whore about to go to work
on a street corner. You sleep around. You fail most of your classes
and for the best part of a year you were completely defiant of
everything I said.” the woman yelled.

“But I didn’t, I don’t. I slept with one person mom, and yes it was a
mistake, but I was hurt, I wanted to feel loved. I know what you’ve
heard mom, but it isn’t true. The wrong people found out and rumours
started but it’s not true. At least give me a chance.” she begged.

Her mother looked at her pitifully.

“Buffy, I don’t know if I can trust you.”

“Try please, give me the opportunity to prove that you can.” her
voice was desperate. Her mother sighed.

“Ok, but I’m giving you one chance. I will give you the benefit of
the doubt. You better redeem yourself.” she warned.

“Thank you.” Buffy whispered. It was all she wanted. The chance to
show her mom that she wasn’t as bad as she seemed to think.




Things had been better since then, not perfect, but better. There
were still arguments but not as many, but she knew her mom still
didn’t really trust her. Spike and she had become more and more
attracted to one another but nothing had happened, neither of them
wanted to risk the friendship they had built in the past couple of
months. But Buffy would admit, she wanted to be with him. She was
falling for him. Unlike before she knew that Spike actually cared
about her. She was thinking about that day while he was at the
counter getting drinks, at the end of their Saturday tutoring
session. She snapped to attention when she saw him coming towards her
from the corner of her.
He knew she was thinking about something, she was tapping her fingers
on the table the way she always did when she was lost in thought, but
he also knew that she had noticed him coming. He sat the warm mugs on
the table.

“What you thinking about blondie?” he asked, sitting down.

“Nothing.”

“Liar.”

“Ok,” she said “I was just thinking about how things have been better
with mom recently.”

“I’m glad.” he said honestly, smiling warmly at her. While thinking
how much he wanted to kiss, well more accurately how he wanted to
bend her over the table and screw her brains out, but he would stick
to the kissing for now. Not that either was happening.

“So, where is your mom today?” he inquired.

“Oh she and Dawn are in LA this weekend.” she told him.

“Oh yeah, that interview.”

A sad look came over her face as she thought about where her mother
was. Her mother had been thinking about taking a job in LA for about
the last month, but Buffy didn’t want to go back. She couldn’t bear
to leave, she was finally happy again and she couldn’t bear to lose
her friends or Spike. But, it was up to her mom.

“Yep, that one. She said she hasn’t decided what she’ll do if she
gets it. But she wants to try anyway. I don’t want to go.” she said
quietly.

“And I don’t want you to.” he admitted shyly.

She smiled, “Thanks, but hey, we don’t know what’s going to happen so
let’s not think about it. Willow and Xander are coming over to watch
movies later. Want to come?” she offered, pouting a little so that he
couldn’t refuse.

The minute he saw her pout his mind was made up for him.

“Sure.”

“Great,” she exclaimed “come by around seven. I need to go.”

She stood up, grabbing her bag she gave him a kiss on the cheek as a
means of saying goodbye and ran for the door.


Spike sat back in his seat and sighed. Nothing had even happened
between them and he was whipped. This was going to be a great night.




Joyce Summers smiled at the man behind the desk. She had a good
feeling about this. She may not have made her mind up for sure yet,
but she was fairly certain what she wanted to do. The girls wanted to
stay in Sunnydale, but she also wanted to take the opportunity. All
she needed was the push that would make her decision. She held her
hand out to shake the hand of her would be employer.

“Thank you, Mr. Jones. I’ll get back to you really soon.” she smiled
once more and left.

Back in the reception area Dawn jumped to her feet..

“Mom, Janice just called, she’s having a sleepover and I really want
to go, do we have to stay here all weekend.” she whined.

“Dawn”. Joyce started to object, but stopped. Thinking for a moment
her niggling doubts about Buffy came back to her. She was trying to
keep her end of the deal, but she just didn’t know if she trusted
Buffy alone in the house alone all weekend. She looked at Dawn and
saw the hopeful look on her face, with a loud sigh she agreed.

“Ok, we can go home. I’ll call the girls see if they want to go out
for a meal. Buffy has her friends coming over for movies. Let’s go.”

They walked out of the building to her parked car and got in. Driving
towards the highway to make their way back to Sunnydale.



Buffy opened the door to find Willow and Xander on the doorstep.

“Hey Buff.” they chorused in an eerily cheery tone.

“Hi guys,” she greeted, looking at them as if trying to decipher
their good mood “You guys are awfully cheerful.” she observed.

“Are we?” Xander looked confused, Buffy couldn’t tell if he was
faking it or not. She made her way back to the living room and the
others followed closing the door behind them.

“Sit down get comfortable.” she ordered.

They did as the were told and Buffy spoke again.

“Oh by the way,” the sound of the doorbell interrupted her “Spike’s
coming” she finished as she went to let him in.
She opened the door with a wide smile.

“Hi Spike.” she greeted.

He gave her a smile, the same shy smile that he saved only for her.
It seemed that she was the only person that he didn’t play his bad
guy persona to.

“Hey Buffy.” he remained standing on the doorstep while Buffy waited
for him to come in. However he didn’t want to do so without her
invite. She soon realised and smiled at him again.

“Come in, Spike.”
He smiled back as he crossed into the hallway.

“Come on through. The others are here.” she told him. He followed
close behind her into the living room.



When he got to the living room he saw a dorky brunette boy and a cute
red head. Making out on the couch. Spike looked at Buffy and thought
that if her eyes got any wider they would fall out of her head. Spike
had to fight to suppress the bark of laughter that was fighting to
get out. The other two teens were oblivious to their presence in the
room. It became obvious to Spike that Buffy was unable to do
anything, so he cleared his throat, letting them know that they had
company and smirked when he saw them jump apart.

“What? How? Huh?” was the most complex thing that Buffy could think
of to say and Spike couldn’t help it he laughed. The other three
glared at him.

“What?” he asked through his laughter “Well you lot should see your
faces. It’s bloody funny.”

“Spike,” Buffy scolded “It’s not funny, I just caught my two best
friends making out.”

“Yeah, pity your two best friends aren’t female,” he leered “now that
would be fun to watch.” Buffy slapped him on the shoulder.

“Ok, bleach boy, that’s enough from you. I changed my mind we’re not
watching movies tonight.”
The others thinking that she was angry or upset with them were going
to apologise, but they never got the chance. Buffy had an idea on how
to find some things out.

“No, we’re going to play ten fingers,” she announced “and every time
you lose a finger, you have to explain what happened in the situation
the thing is related to.” she announced.

The others groaned and Spike was quick to protest.

“Buffy, I don’t think that’s such a great idea. I mean I’m older than
you so...” he left the question hanging, knowing that they probably
knew what he meant but he wasn’t getting away with it that easily.

“Oh no you don’t mister. We are all playing.” she told him, her voice
telling him she was serious. He nodded in muted agreement.

“Great.” she chirped “Okay. Well Wills, Xander you guys move
everything out of the way so we have room on the floor. Spike help me
get snacks and all that stuff.” she instructed.


Ten minutes later the four were sitting in a circle, Buffy was about
to start the game when Xander spoke.

“Don’t we need more people?”

“Nope, we’ll make do. Now let’s start. Wills you go.”

The shy redhead tried to think of something. It wasn’t that she had
done many things, she just didn’t want to sound like a baby in front
of Spike, having one very little.

“Um, I’ve never had a one night stand,” she mouthed an apology to
Buffy, as she watched her friend and Spike put down a finger. Xander
waited patiently for the story.

“You guys all know my story.” she mumbled.
All eyes turned to Spike, who looked sheepish.

“Um well, do I have to?” he looked at Buffy who gave him a look that
told him he did “Well, I’ve had more than one.” he admitted “Um, one
with a girl, she was at a college party. Harmony, really annoying but
I’d just been dumped and I was hurt so it happened.” the other three
shared a look saying that they were all thinking the same thing.

“Was that a girl from your college Spike?” asked Xander.

“Yeah, she was doing design, so I never see her around.”

“Um Spike, what was her surname?” came Buffy’s voice.

“Um, it began with a K. Oh, Kendall.”

The three teens looked at each other and broke into simultaneous
laughter.

“What!?” exclaimed the confused bleach blonde.

“Um Spike, Harmony Kendall doesn’t go to UC Sunnydale.” Buffy
informed him.

“What does she live near here or something, you know her?”

“Something like that.” sniggered Xander earning himself an elbow in
the gut from Willow.

“No, she doesn’t live around here. I do have a few classes with her
though.” Buffy told him with a grimace..

Spike choked on the water he had just taken a sip of.

“Wh, What?” he stammered.

“Spike Harmony goes to school with us.” She repeated patting his
shoulder, part of her wanted to laugh and the other felt sorry for
him.,

“Oh God” he groaned “I’m a monster. I slept with an underage girl.”

“Spike, it wasn’t your fault. Quite frankly Harmony is a big slut.
She lied to you.”

“I know but.”

“No buts” she shushed him “it happened but she lied. Don’t blame
yourself.” she ran her hand up and down his back to comfort him.


Willow and Xander watched the affection between them and shared a
smile. Xander was still worried, but Spike seemed to genuinely care.
A few minutes later Spike decided to get the game back on track, try
and forget the previous question.

“Ok it’s my turn.” he yelled.
Everyone turned their attention to him and waited, an evil smirk
covered his features.

“I’ve never cum in my pants.” the question was directed at Xander, he
couldn’t help himself. Everyone burst out laughing, everyone except
Xander anyway, when he put his finger down.

Red faced Buffy asked him to share.

“You’re evil.” he shot at Spike.

“What can I tell you? I’ve always been bad.” he smirked.

Grumbling Xander started his story.

“Well, Faith,” Willow bristled hearing the name, Xander offered no
explanation as to who she was, quite frankly Spike didn’t care “well
at the Bronze, she followed me to the bathroom. I had that crush on
her and she had been writhing around all night, and I was hard as
nails. I went to the bathroom and locked myself in a stall, and I was
jerking off furiously. Well next thing I know there’s a loud knock on
the door and I jump, I then learned that I hadn’t locked the door
like I thought. I hadn’t stopped so when the door came flying open
she saw everything. I was so embarrassed. Anyway, I put my pants back
on. She said some stuff and did some stuff and then left. I followed
her to where she was dancing and she was writhing again. Next thing I
know she’s pressed up against me and I was getting closer and closer
while I watched her. Next thing I know she grinds herself into me,
and I couldn’t stop. I blew.” by the time a crimson faced Xander
finishes the rest of the group is laughing hysterically.


The rest of the evening continued in a similar fashion. It was filled
with laughter and stories and generally just four friends having a
good time. By 11.30 though everyone was leaving. Spike offered to
stay and help Buffy clean up, and she gladly accepted. So after
saying their goodbyes they were back in the living room.

“Thanks for offering to help Spike.”

“No problem. I helped make the mess in all the fun.” he grinned.

“I really do appreciate your help though Spike. And I don’t just mean
the cleaning.”

Spike turned to look at her “Buffy, I love helping you. I love
spending time with you, I love you.” he halted. He put a hand to his
mouth not able to believe what he had just said. Was it true though.
He had never really thought about it . He knew he cared about her and
had a crush on her. But thinking about it now, yes, he did love her.


Buffy was looking at him in wide eyed astonishment, she had dreamed
of him saying those words but never imagined he actually would. She
knew that she had to be honest with him.

“Spike, you have no idea how much hearing you say that means. But I
can’t help thinking about…”

“I’m not him, Buffy. I don’t just want sex from you. In fact you’re
too young I don’t want a repeat.”

This time Buffy interrupted.

“Spike, difference is I haven’t lied to you. I’m not her. I want you,
the whole package.” she told him..
He inched closer taking her chin in his fingers and pulling her to
him.

“Are you sure Buffy?” he asked, he had to be sure, even though he
knew that the age thing, not the difference, but her being sixteen
was wrong. If she was sure and she felt the same way, then he
wouldn’t fight it.

“I’m sure, I love you too, Spike.”
That was all he needed. He brought his lips to hers in an earth
shattering kiss.


Chapter 6: Motherly Love




Buffy pulled back from the kiss and took Spike by the hand. Leading
him out of the room and up the stairs to her bedroom. Once inside she
wasted no time. She kissed him deeply, hands roaming in the hairs at
the back of his neck. She moved her hands down his back and around to
start pulling at the buttons of his shirt. She was trying to get it
done as quickly as possible, eager to see him with nothing on. After
a few moments struggling with the buttons, last one was undone and
she pushed the shirt from his shoulders, revealing his sculptured
chest and well defined muscles. She took her lips away from his and
started kissing her way down his chest, kissing every inch. When she
reached his belly button she reached up to undo his trousers, but was
swiftly pulled back to her feet.



Spike began to lavish the same attention on her. Kissing her
sensually as he slid her top off, kissing his way down the column of
her throat, and down to the valley between her breasts. He reached
around to her back to unclasp her bra, allowing it to fall from her
body. He the started kissing her breasts and took a nipple into his
mouth, kissing and sucking on it. He then gave the same attention to
the other side, while rubbing his hands up and down her back. Buffy
purred in pleasure at what he was doing, feeling things that she
hadn’t felt before.

Spike slid his hands slowly down her back, and unzipped her denim
skirt, pulling it over her hips and letting it fall to pool around
her feet. Buffy was left standing in just her thong. Spike placed one
last kiss on her belly before standing and pressing their lips
together, prying her lips open with his tongue, exploring her mouth.
While their mouths were occupied Buffy reached down and undid the
button and zip of his jeans, pushing them down his hips. Without
breaking the kiss Spike used his feet to push them off completely. He
turned so that they were facing the bed and walked Buffy backwards.
When Buffy’s legs hit the edge of the bed he lowered her down and
broke the kiss, once again trailing kisses down her body. Buffy
trailed her hands down his chest at the same time. Spike kneeled in
front of her and slid her thong off, he then brought his mouth down
and kissed all along the sensitive flesh between her legs. Buffy
moaned at the feel of it. Owen hadn’t done that, but she was glad
Spike did, she loved the feeling. He moved his way up and then
lowered his tongue to her clit, eliciting a moan of pleasure from
Buffy. He continued paying her attention with his tongue for a few
minutes before he inserted a finger into her.

“Oh god” she moaned, thrusting her hips to gain more friction. Spike
smirked while continuing what he was doing. Enjoying the fact that he
was the one making her feel so good.

He added another finger and sought out the spot that he knew would
make her scream. When he found it he began rubbing gently over it,
never stopping the actions of his tongue. Before long Buffy was
falling .

“Spike, oh god, Spike.” she moaned as she came.

Spike kept up his ministrations allowing her to ride out the waves of
her orgasm, bringing her down gently. When she was done, he removed
his fingers and moved to lie beside her on the bed. He leaned down
and placed a small kiss on her lips, only a brush of lips lasting
just a few seconds.

“That was, wow.” she breathed.

Spike smiled down at her “Glad you liked it.”

“Oh, I really did,” she told him “but there’s something else I’d like
even more.”

"Isthat right?” he purred in her hair.

“Uh huh.” she nodded pulling him in for another scorching kiss, he
manoeuvred him self so that he was lying above her.

He breathed heavily as he placed himself at her entrance, looking at
her for confirmation that she was sure, she smiled and nodded. With
that he pushed himself inside in one swift thrust. He stilled for a
moment, allowing her to adjust to him, and enjoying the feel of her.
Then he started to thrust slowly in and out, setting up an easy
rhythm, the way he was positioned meant that every time he pulled out
he brushed against her clit, causing her to moan his name repeatedly.

“Spike, oh.” she repeated over and over.

Spike loved hearing her, loved feeling her around him. As their speed
picked up as both neared their peak Spike began slamming into her
harder and faster, their breaths were coming in pants as hey hurtled
towards the edge. Buffy was writhing in pleasure.

“Spike, Spike, oh god Spike.” his name was like a mantra on her lips.

Spike reached a hand down between them and rubbed her clit, applying
gentle pressure, this was the final push she needed and she came
screaming his name. Feeling her contract around him was enough to
make Spike follow right behind her, thrusting just a couple more
times before spilling himself within her. He stayed atop her panting,
both trying to catch their breath. He lowered her head, kissing her
softly before rolling off to lay beside her.


“Wow.” Buffy repeated the same sentiments as before.
“Yeah.” Spike agreed, stroking his finger up and down her arm,
revelling in the afterglow, and enjoying being beside her.

“And my mom doesn’t get home until late tomorrow so we get to do it
all over again.”

“Well alright then.” he said, capturing her lips in a searing kiss,
he pulled her close to him and they lay kissing for about ten
minutes, only stopping for air. By the time they broke apart Spike’s
hard on was back full force. Buffy rolled so that he was on his back
and she was straddling him. She kissed down his chest, grasping his
erection in her hand and stroking it, pulling a lout moan from Spike.



Joyce walked through the front door and went to the loving room,
expecting to see it a mess, but pleasantly surprised to see quite the
opposite. She looked at the clock and seeing it was well after 1 am
she guessed Buffy was in bed. She heard a creaking from upstairs and
decided to see if she was still awake, so she made her way upstairs.


Buffy rose herself above him placing him at her entrance, slowly
sinking down on him, and drawing in a breath at the feeling of their
joining. She was about to start moving on him when the bedroom door
opened.



Joyce heard more creaks as she neared Buffy’s bedroom door, but
thought Buffy must be walking around. She wasn’t prepared for what
she saw when she gently pushed the door open.


Upon hearing the door Buffy snapped her head round, while Spike
looked up, to be met with the angry eyes of Joyce Summers.


“Mom.” Buffy cried, jumping off Spike and pulling the sheets up to
cover them.

Buffy gulped, seeing the look on her mothers face. A look she had
hoped never to see again. A look of disgust and disappointment. Joyce
shook her head.

“Downstairs now.” she ordered, turning and stomping out of the room.

Buffy looked at Spike and burst into tears. She knew what her mother
would say and she didn’t think she could handle hearing it. Spike
automatically wrapped her in a tight hug whispering soothing words of
love in her ear. When she had calmed a little, he let her go and they
proceeded to dress quickly. When the were done they went downstairs,
Spike grasping her hand in his as the entered the room.

Joyce looked up when she heard them come down the stairs and eyed
their clasped hands in trepidation. She said nothing, standing in
front of the fire place, trying to reign in her anger. Buffy looked
at her. Waiting for the onslaught to do. After a few moments, Joyce
let them have it.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing? It’s bad enough that my
sixteen year old daughter is sleeping with a 21 year old man, but in
my house.” she yelled, pointing at Buffy she continued “You begged me
to believe that you didn’t do things like this Buffy and I’ve tried
but then you start putting it about like a slut.”

Buffy looked down, fresh tears streaming down her face, she didn’t
say anything to her mom. Suddenly something that had seemed so right
twenty minutes ago, seemed so shameful now. Spike on the other hand
did have something to say.

“Mrs. Summers that isn’t fair. Buffy and I have only slept together
once. And I know that doesn’t make it any better in your eyes but she
isn’t a slut. We haven’t lied to you and we love each other. We did
nothing wrong.”

“Oh really?” Joyce shouted “It is illegal to sleep with a minor
William,” she spat “and more importantly I would think you had more
sense than to sleep with her.”

Buffy got angry.

“What is so wrong with me?” she screamed “I love him, he loves me. I
don’t regret it. I would do it again. Mom, I love you, and I’m sorry
that you had to see that, but I’m not sorry it happened. But I’m not
a slut mom. I don’t sleep with random guys, I just fell in love and
it felt right.” she sobbed.


Joyce’s face was red with anger

“Buffy Anne Summers, listen to me, and listen good, you live in my
house and you will do as I say. You will not have sex in my house.
Ever. You disappoint me repeatedly.” Joyce told her.

“Mom, I said I was sorry. But I won’t stop seeing Spike.”

Joyce’s features softened slightly, but she made a decision in that
moment, and her face and mind was resolved.

“Well then enjoy the next three weeks,” Joyce said “because in three
weeks, we’re going back to LA.”
Buffy opened her mouth to argue.

“Don’t argue,” Joyce said before Buffy had a chance to say
anything “my mind is made up. Nothing has changed in the time we’ve
been here. We need to try somewhere else, maybe going back to LA is
the best thing.” with that she left the room.

Buffy turned to Spike, seeing tears in his eyes, she fell into his
arms and the fell to the floor, holding each other close, crying and
feeling like they had lost each other already.

Chapter 7: Farewell My Love



The next three weeks passed too quickly for both of them. The night Joyce had announced the move they had remained on he floor crying and holding each other for others. Clinging to one another and never wanting to let go. After Spike left Buffy went to her room and cried some more. Since that night, they had made a point of seeing each other most days. They kept up the tutoring, but instead of their chats they usually ended back at Spike’s apartment. Which was the case on this particular day.

“I can’t believe that you’re leaving the day after tomorrow” Spike said as he pulled his jeans back on.

Buffy who was already dressed sat down on the bed, looking sad “me either” she said softly

Spike moved over to stand in front of her, taking her chin in his hand she tilted her head up to look at him

“I don’t want you to leave. But please remember I love you” a tear rolled down his face as he spoke the words, words which came directly from his heart. A heart that was slowly breaking.

“I love you too” she whispered, feeling the same emotions and shedding identical tears, she put her arms around his waist, trying to hold him as close as she possibly could.
She wanted to stay there with him but she had some more packing to do so, she reluctantly let him go.

“You are definitely coming tonight, aren’t you?” she asked

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world” he told her, stroking her hair.

Buffy had managed to get her mother to agree to Willow, Xander and Spike stay over. They had the whole night, and all day tomorrow planned to spend together. However Joyce would be in the house, and Xander and Spike were to sleep downstairs. But at least he’d be there. He walked with her to the door, kissing her as he opened it

“I’ll see you later” he promised

“See you soon” she said as she left.


Buffy walked to her house with tears streaming down her face. She knew that she would at least get to spend some more time with him, but it was all becoming too real, she was leaving and she was going to lose him. She walked in the front door, and went like a zombie to her room. She mechanically went through the motions of packing up the last of her things. She looked at the boxes that covered her room, her life, the life she had found in Sunnydale, all in boxes. She looked at her bed and found a photo there of herself and Willow, Spike and Xander that they had made a point of taking when they found out she was moving. Lying right beside it, was the only photo of her and Spike. She picked them up, hugged them to her chest. She slid to the floor and cried some more.



She managed to compose her self for everyone arriving at seven. She came down the stairs and checked that her face was alright, straightened her clothes, and plastered a fake smile on her face before throwing the door open. All three of the people she loved most were standing there, when they came in they stood in silence in the hall, until Willow said something

“Stop smiling, you’re leaving and none of us are happy” the face slid from Buffy’s face and fresh tears replaced it, Willow soon followed and the two grabbed each other in a tight hug. The two boys tried to hide their emotions, acting like they were ok, but seeing their counterparts so upset they allowed the façade to drop, Spike let his own tears fall, and so did Xander and the joined the hug. Joyce stood at the top of the stairs and watched the four young people, but she was still determined. The four must have stood like that for ten minutes, no- one ever saying a word, just allowing themselves to feel how they did. When they all felt like they had cried their last tear for now they broke apart. Spike wrapped an arm around Buffy, Xander the same to Willow, and they went into the living room.

“So, what do you guys want to do tonight?” Buffy asked the small group

“Movies?” suggested Xander

“Truth or Dare” Said Willow

“Make out” Spike said with a smirk. This made everyone feel a bit better and they all laughed a bit

“I know” said Willow “why don’t we just make it like an old fashioned sleepover. Tell ghost stories, just talk, Have one last night of fun”
The group all nodded their agreement

“I think that’s a great idea” Buffy agreed “come on Wills we’ll get changed in my room. Boys you can get dressed in Dawn’s room, she’s out tonight” Buffy instructed everyone.


Fifteen minutes later everyone was changed into their night clothes and sitting around on the living room floor.

“So what are we going to start with Buff?” Xander asked

“Truth or Dare” she announced

Spike groaned he hated this game, but it was all for Buffy so he would endure it. He would do anything she wanted.

“Ok luv, who’s gonna start?” he inquired

“I will” she decided “Spike, truth or dare?”

“Dare” he replied straight away

“Ok, I dare you to kiss me right now”

“Ok” he agreed, leaning over to her, capturing her lips in a soft kiss, it was quite long kiss too

“Um guys, we’re still here” Willow pointed out

The two blondes pulled apart wearing identical smiles and loving looks

“Ok” spike said “Willow truth or dare?”

“uh” Willow saw the sly look in Spike’s eye and decided to take the easy way out “truth”

“Ok, have you and Xander done the deed yet” there was a naughty twinkle in his eye, Willow and Xander wore identical blushes, and Buffy had her head buried in a pillow trying not to laugh at the looks on their faces

“of course” she squeaked, Spike gave her a look and she looked away “ok, no” she squeaked. Spike squeezed her shoulder

“Don’t worry Red, no need to be embarrassed” he reassured. Willow smile gratefully, while Xander seemed like he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him. That wasn’t going to happen so he decided to take his revenge instead

“Ok Buff, truth or dare?” he asked

“truth” Buffy thought that the boy would not be able to embarrass her too much if she took this option, she was wrong

“How big is Spike?”

Buffy didn’t seem to get the question, in fact she thought it was lame “5 foot 10” she answered

Xander laughed “No Buff, I meant downstairs” Spike’s eyes widened to comical proportions, while Xander and Willow shared an evil smile. Buffy looked even more than her friend had before

“It’s just” Xander went on “I head Harm talking a while back about some college guy she laid, and he was apparently very small. Just wondered if it was the same person”

Spike looked like he could kill, he was completely mortified, just as his girlfriend was

“he’s big” she answered trying to avoid giving a straight answer

“How big?” Xander prodded

She looked at Spike for help, he looked sympathetic and embarrassed

“about 9inches or so. I don’t know I didn’t measure it”

Spike was beet red by now, he normally wasn’t bothered by this sort of thing but it wasn’t really something he wanted to discuss with Xander

“I don’t know” Xander said shaking his head “I think we need proof”

That was enough for Spike, he was fed up with the teasing. He didn’t feel shy any more, just like the bad ass most people thought of him as so he stood up and made sure the door was closed

“You want proof, I’ll give you proof” with that he pulled down the sweat pants he was wearing. Willow stared wide eyed at his groin, Xander was open mouth and Buffy was looking very horny.

“Ok enough proof” Xander said, Spike didn’t move

“Honey pull up your pants” she ordered

“Why? He wanted to see it”

“yeah” she concurred “but if you don’t I’m gonna jump you right here and I don’t think my mom or friends would appreciate that”

Spike got a certain look in his eye, he pulled up the pants and curled his tongue behind his teeth

“I don’t mind” he stated. Buffy threw a pillow at him as he sat back down, the other two still hadn’t said a word.

“Back to the game” Willow eventually suggested.



The rest of the night carried on in a similar fashion, joking and having fun. They talked about everything that they had been through together since she had come to Sunnydale, the good times and the bad. There were laughs and more tears. But more importantly an even stronger bond was formed, it became that night that no matter what these four people would always be friends, always care for each other. Nobody slept in Buffy’s room that night. They started watching a movie about 1am, Buffy and Spike curled up on the couch, Willow and Xander on the same position on the floor. And they were all in the same positions when they woke at 9am the next morning.



By eleven they were all sitting on the beach. They were spending the day much as they had spent the previous night, just talking and having fun. They had a throw away barbeque. They lit that up at noon, sitting on blankets on a quiet bit of the beach, Xander stood at the barbeque flipping burgers

“How does everyone want their burgers?” he called

“cooked” the others replied in unison, laughing. Xander grinned over at them. Buffy was sitting between Spike’s legs, Willow lying on her stomach in front of them.

“So, Buff, I hate talking about this but I guess we don’t have a choice” she sighed “is everything sorted for starting school and all on Monday?”

“Yeah” Buffy said, returning Willow’s sigh “First thing Monday morning I am once more a member of Hemery High School”

“Well, at least you’ll have friends there” willow observed

“No I won’t. None of those people were my friends. They stopped talking to me after the divorce and I didn’t have my father’s money anymore” she told them

Just then Xander came over holding a tray of hamburgers

“Here you go” he said as he came over “nice warm, cooked burgers”

Everyone got up to get their food and then they sat down in a circle to eat

“So Buff, all done with the packing?” Xander questioned

“Yeah, all done” she told them “but you know what guys, let’s not talk about this ok”

“Ok, baby” Spike said “whatever you want”

“Thank you” she whispered

“Buffy, do you remember that first parent teacher night you went to?”

“Oh my god Wills, of course I do” she cried “my mom went total psycho on me because I was failing and basically being the bad- ass I was at the time. And then that gang broke into the school” she stared the story and waited for someone else to continue

“yeah and principal Snyder ran away, and your mom hit one of them over the head with a fire extinguisher” Will0ow laughed

Spike listened to the story in amusement

“that was cool” Xander chimed in

“Yeah but Buffy was the best, the leader grabbed her. She bit him and then kicked him in the balls. I swear he screamed like a girl” Willow continued
By now, they were all laughing, but it was bittersweet

“We had some good times together, some good memories” she observed, a sad smile on her lips

“Yeah, we did” Xander agreed, Willow only nodding her agreement for fear she would cry again. Spike squeezed Buffy tight, showing how much he cared.

The rest of the meal was finished in comfortable silence, each of them lost in their own memories, thoughts and feelings. When she was finished Buffy stood up and brushed herself off, she rummaged in her bag for a moment, pulling out a clip for her hair. Pinning her hair back she removed her shorts and stood in her bathing suit. She turned to the water and took of toward it at a run

“Last one in’s a rotten egg” she called over her shoulder as she made her way in.
Spike jumped to his feet and followed, closely followed by Willow and Xander. Pike swam right to Buffy and scooped her in his arms when he reached her, kissing her. They were interrupted when they were splashed with water, announcing the arrival of Buffy’s friends. Soon they were having and all out water fight. Buffy ducked under the water, swam round behind Spike, and came back to the surface. She tapped him on the shoulder, winking at her friends who tried to suppress their giggles. When he turned around she splashed him right in the face.

“You little… I’m gonna get you for that” he declared, making a grab for her, but she was too quick and swam away from him. He followed after. They swam in circles for a few minutes, and then Spike stopped. He managed to keep a straight face as he made another declaration

“Alright I give, luv, you win”

Buffy smiled triumphantly as she came back to him, he took her by surprise as soon as she was within reach. He grabbed her, picked her up and threw her back into the water a little bit away from him. Willow and Xander watched on laughing, every once in a while continuing their own water fight. Spike began to worry when after a few moments Buffy still hadn’t surface. He moved cautiously across the water, he felt something touch his ankle and the next thing he knew he was under the water, Buffy attached to his back. When they surfaced, he spun her round

“You are a mean little girl” he informed her

“Yep, I’m bad” she drawled in a very seductive voice, pulling him into a kiss. When they parted they turned fully intending to restart having fun with the others, but they found them locked in a make out session of their own. So they turned back to one another and resumed theirs.


After a few minutes of that they broke apart, seeing that Willow and Xander were no longer in the water, they could be seen making their way back to where they had been sitting earlier.

“You wanna go back?” Spike asked her, nuzzling his face in her neck

“no”

“ok, let’s take a swim” he took her by the hand and paddled a little bit. They didn’t talk, they just paddled in the water with their hands clasped. Neither felt the need for words, they only needed to be together. They swam for around fifteen minutes before deciding to go back to shore. They walked hand in hand up the beach, Willow and Xander were playing with a Frisbee, which Spike caught when it went over Willows head. Without drying off, the two lovers joined the game. The rest of the afternoon and early evening passed in fun. They played Frisbee, talked some more and had fun.


It was 7pm and the sun was setting, the two couples were sitting together. The girls were sitting between their boyfriend’s legs, watching the sun go down in content silence. Suddenly Willow jumped up and ran to her bag, everyone watched as she pulled a Polaroid camera from her bag and waved it around

“We need one last set of pictures” she announced, rejoining the group “all of us first” she ordered. The four of them huddled together, Willow held the camera out in front of them, the grinned widely as the camera flashed and the picture appeared.


They waited for it to be visible and laughed when the saw how cheesy they all looked. They flashed a few more random shots and Buffy was giggling wholeheartedly

“I think that’s enough Wills” she said through her giggles

“Ok” she grumbled


She went over to Xander and the two stood whispering between themselves, spontaneously looking over at their friends. Meanwhile, Buffy and Spike settled on the sand, Buffy in the same position as before, Spike’s head buried in the side of her neck

“I’m going to miss you so much” he murmured

“me too” she said softly “but at least we had some time together”

“yeah” he agreed gently “and I’ll never forget it. Or you”

“I love you” she told him, looking deeply into his blue eyes

“I love you too” he returned the sentiment, and allowed all of his emotions to show in his voice. They smiled at each other lovingly, and then they saw a flash.



Willow and Xander watched the exchange that was currently taking place between Spike and Buffy. The love between them was laid out for everyone to see. Willow couldn’t resist, she looked down at the camera in her hands, smiled, motioned to Xander so he knew what she was doing and moved closer to the couple. She snapped one photo, but they remained oblivious, so she took it again. This time the flash grabbed their attention and the looked up at her startled.

“What are you doing, you almost gave me a heart attack” Buffy exclaimed. Willow couldn’t help the laugh that escaped. She held out the photo’s towards the now standing couple, who took them from her and smiled at the image looking at them

“I just thought you might like one last photo. Something to remember today by. And how much you both love each other” Willow explained. This caused Buffy’s tears to fall again

“I love it. Thanks Will” she said, hugging her friend

“Yeah red, thanks”

“you’re welcome” she replied
Buffy looked at her watch and looked sad

“Well I guess it’s time to go” she announced

“yeah” agreed Xander, and the Willow and lastly Spike. They walked off the beach and got into Spike’s car. The distance to Buffy’s house was driven in silence.


When everyone emerged from the car, they stood on the sidewalk, not saying a word

“We’ll come by in the morning Buff, say goodbye then” Xander finally broke the silence

“Ok” she walked over and hugged him and then Willow

“I’ll see you in the morning. Night guys”

“Night” the called as they walked off in the direction of Willow’s house. That left Buffy and Spike on their own, Spike could see that Buffy was about to cry again so he reached out and cupped her cheek, stroking his thumb up and down it lovingly

“Don’t cry luv” he pleaded “I can‘t bear to see you cry. I’ll be back later, I have something for you. I need to go home and get it. But I’ll be back soon” he promised, kissing her on the head

She nodded and looked up into his eyes “hurry back”

“I will, promise” he swore to her as he opened the car door. He got In, started the engine and drove off, leaving her on the sidewalk. She walked numbly back inside.



Joyce saw Buffy come inside and the look in her eyes

“Let’s talk” she said to her daughter, leading her into the living room “Buffy” she started as soon as they were both sitting on the couch “I want you to know that I’m doing this because I really don’t think things can get any worse than they have been. You and I have hardly spoken in a year. We need a change”

“I don’t want a change” Buffy cried “I’m happy here. The reason we haven’t spoken is because you goy caught up in believing the same thing as everyone else, but you never asked for my side of the story”

“Well, I’m listening now, tell me”

“You think I’m a slut because I slept with Owen. Mom, I know I shouldn’t have but I thought he loved me. I was hurt, after the divorce I felt like nobody wanted me, loved me. I wanted to be loved, I needed someone. Riley said he loved me, and I needed it so much that I let myself believe it, and get drawn in and I slept with him. Things got bad and he broke up with me right after and said things about me” she took a deep breath and continued her story

“You let yourself believe the rumour. Te clothes I wear don’t make me a slut, I just like them. Sleeping with one guy, one time, doesn’t make me a slut either, it just makes me naïve for falling for his game” she finished

“And Spike?” asked her mother


“Is completely different” she told her “Spike, was just a friend. He knew what I was feeling because he had been there. I could talk to him. I talked to Willow but she didn’t understand, she couldn’t help me get by it. Spike could. Things happen, we got closer, we fell in love. That time you caught us, was the first time. But it felt right. He is completely different from Riley mom, he loves me he really does” she explained, tears rolling down her cheeks, hoping her mother would finally understand where she was coming from.


Joyce looked at her, she felt immense guilt and sympathy. But she wouldn’t change her mind. There was one thing she could do though

“I’m sorry Buffy” her mother said, tears now coming to her own eyes “I should have listened to you before” she moved closer and hugged her, trying to show how sincerely sorry she was.

“Spike can stay tonight” she said

Buffy looked at her wide eyed, she was grateful, he would have to sleep on the couch she knew, but at least he would be there. Joyce knew what she was thinking and shook her head

“No Buffy, he doesn’t have to sleep on the couch. I may not be happy about you sleeping with him, but you do it anyway, I’ll let you have this last night together” she informed her ecstatic daughter. Buffy jumped up and threw her arms around her

“Thank you so much mom, you have no idea how much this means to me” she let her mother go and ran from the room, making sure that her room was as tidy as it was going to be seeing as it was filled with boxes.



An hour later she heard the doorbell and bounded down the stairs, throwing the door open and jumping into her boyfriend’s arms before he had a chance to say anything, she covered his face in kisses, finishing with his lips. When she pulled back she gave him a sly smile

“guess who’s staying over tonight”

“Willow” he guessed, puzzled by his girlfriend’s change in mood and demeanour

“Nope, you” she announced “and you’re not sleeping on the couch”

“Um, Buffy your mum”

“her idea” she interrupted

“Well then, can’t say I have any complaints” he smirked. She took his hand and pulled him inside. Looking at the clock they saw that it was 10pm

“Mom we’re just gonna so straight upstairs” she called, pulling Spike behind her.


They entered Buffy’s room and sat on the bed. Spike looked worried about something

“Is something wrong?” Buffy asked

“What? No” he denied

“Spike” she said in a tone that said she knew he was lying

“Ok” he reached into his pocket and produced a small box and held it out to her “I wanted to give you this and I was just worrying over whether you’d like it or not”

Buffy took it from him and smiled “I’ll like it” she opened the box and gasped at what was inside. It was a silver locket with a rose engraved on the front. The petals were encrusted with tiny red stones, and the stem with green. She opened it up and smiled at the pictures inside, beginning to cry again. Inside was a picture of the four of them together, one day in a park. Willow, Xander, Buffy and Spike, all wearing big smiles. In the other side was the photo that Willow had taken on the beach earlier that evening.


“I love it, but what about your copy of the photo?” she wondered

“Don’t worry about it, I still have it. Willow took an extra photo. Just in case” he let her know this in a soft, soothing and loving voice. “Look at the back” he ordered.


She turned it over and took In the words inscribed in the back “together in our hearts. Always. I love You. S.” the tears were falling in a steady stream, she handed it to him so that he could put it on.

When that was done, he brought his lips to hers, the kiss started off slow and gentle, soon becoming more forceful and demanding. She quickly allowed his tongue inside, battling with it for dominance. They lay back on the bed, Spike kissed down the side of her face to her neck, rubbing his up and down her arms. She sat up, and he pulled her shirt over her head, he moved to unclasp her bra. While he did that she pulled his own t- shirt over his head. Kissing down his chest. She brought her hands down to undo his belt, pulling it loose. She stood in front of him and allowed him to lower her jeans, and slipped them off. He then did the same. Soon they were both completely naked and once gain lying back on the bed. Spike was kissing her all over, she urged him to look at her

“Make love to me” she begged, as his kisses began to lower, he lowered his mouth to her mound, but she pulled him back up “No, I just need you now”

He nodded and slid up her body, hovering over her. He positioned himself at her entrance and slid himself in slowly. Buffy shivered in the pleasure of being connected to him. He waited a moment to let her adjust before he started to move, thrusting slowly in and out at a slow, sensual pace. Buffy met every thrust, wrapping her arms around his waist to keep him as close as possible. They kept the same steady pace up until they tumbled over the edge together, each having the others name on their lips. Spike kissed her slowly, pouring his heart and soul into the kiss. Rolling onto his side, he pulled her with him holding her close.

“I love you” he whispered

“I love you too”

Moments later they were both asleep, they woke up the next morning still wrapped in each others arms. She let out a content sigh as she woke, feeling his body next to hers. She was about to smile when it hit her, she was leaving today. In an hour actually so she had to get up. She sat up and reached for her robe. Spike watched her, thinking the same thing she was. This was it. She was leaving. He reached down to pick up his jeans. Swinging his legs over the edge he pulled them on. Instead of going into the bathroom like she usually would, she went over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her head in his chest. He kissed the top of her head. Revelling in the feel of her, knowing it wouldn’t happen again

“You need to get ready luv” he reminded her

“I don’t want to” it was barely a whisper but she heard it, and she knew he was right. She pulled out of his embrace and turned to go to the bathroom.



An hour later they were back on the sidewalk. The movers had just left and the car was parked. Willow and Xander were standing beside them. Willow was the first to break down
“Buffy, I can’t believe you’re really going. You’re my best friend I don’t know what I’ll do with out you” she told Buffy, tears streaking her face, as she hugged her friend close

“Me either”

“Buffy it’s time to go” Joyce announced.Buffy nodded and looked at her friends and Spike.

“Well I guess this is it” she said

Xander grabbed her into a bear hug “Bye Buff. I’ll miss you”

“I’ll miss you too Xan” she said
Willow came next, hugging her again “Bye Buffy keep I touch, ok?”

“I swear” Buffy promised her

Lastly was Spike, he didn’t try to hide his tears, he threw his arms around her, holding her tight and pulling away only slightly to catch her lips in a passionate kiss

“I love you, I always will. God, I’ll miss you so much. I don’t wanna lose you” he cried

“I love you too. And I will never forget you. I love you so much, but you will always be in my heart” it was a vow from her to him, that a part of her would always belong to him. She kissed him one last time

“Goodbye” she whispered

“Bye, luv” he let her go and watched as she got into the car beside her mother, tears falling continuously. He stood there as the engine started and the car drove off. Willow ran to embrace him in a hug, as the both cried and watched their best friend, and the woman he loved drive out of their lives.



Chapter 8: Moving On



Buffy walked down the halls of Hemery High school, she stopped at her locker. She dialled the code and opened it up, taking out her notebook. She put her bag inside and closed the door. When she turned around she saw a beautiful brunette girl coming towards her

“Hey B” the girl greeted “what have you got first period?”

“Hey Faith” Buffy returned the greeting “I have English”

“Wanna skip?” Faith suggested.

Buffy feigned thinking about it for a moment before nodding her head enthusiastically

“Oh you bet”

“Ok let’s go”
The two girls turned and headed back towards the main doors, but their path was blocked, when the looked to see who it was standing in their way they came face to face with a smirking Angel O’ Dannaghan. Angel was tall and well built. With dark hair, and deep brown eyes. He was also a good friend.

“Hello Ladies” he drawled “how are you this fine day?”

“Hey babe” Said Faith “we are perfectly fine. In fact we were just on our way outta here” she informed him

“Is that so? Well what would your mothers say?” he smirked

“What they don’t know won’t hurt them” Buffy said, returning the smirk “So are you going to join us?”

“For you sweet cheeks, anything” he jokingly offered one arm to Buffy and the other to Faith, after interlocking arms they made off down the hallway. They walked to the school parking lot and jumped into Angel’s black convertible.

“So where to?” Angel asked
Buffy and Faith shared a look

“Mall” they cried together, Angel rolled his eyes and turned sharply out of the parking lot, heading for the mall.



The three friends were sitting in the food court of the Mall, chatting, and making fun of people as they passed. A girl walked past, she was wearing a pink fuzzy jumper and a knee length pleated skirt. They all began to laugh simultaneously. Faith gave Angel a look and he jumped from his seat, walking over to the girl while Buffy and Faith watched. He rushed over and tapped her on the shoulder

“Hi” he said in his most sexy voice “I’m Angel, and I couldn’t help but notice you. I have to say you look fantastic”

“Thank you” the girl blushed

“Well, I was wondering would you like to go out with me some time?” Angel had to try very hard not to laugh, especially as he could see the girls laughing hysterically from where he was standing. Also, the way the girls face lit up at the question almost made him break down and let the laugh come out

“Yes, I’d really like that. Um, how about..”

“Oh sorry” Angel interjected “I forgot something”

“What?”

“I don’t date freaks” his laughter came tumbling out at the girls crestfallen look, when she heard him laugh she burst into tears, looking around she saw Buffy and Faith laughing and ran. Trying to get as far away as possible, feeling totally humiliated.



Angel sauntered back over to the table and slid into the seat next to Buffy. Propping his elbow on the table he faced Buffy

“So goldilocks, you ready to go on that date with me yet?”

Angel had been trying to persuade Buffy to go out with him ever since she had moved back to LA over a month ago. So far she had always said no. She always thought of Spike, she knew that she couldn’t be with him, but she still loved him. She grasped the locket around her neck, she had never taken it off. She rubbed her thumb over the engraving. As much as she wished she could be with him, it wasn’t going to happen.. She had to try and move on

“Sure” she answered

His eyes lit up “Really? That’s great well how about The Garage tonight?”

“Sounds great” she agreed. She wasn’t completely happy, but she had to move on, this would be the first step.






Back in Sunnydale, Spike sat in his history lecture, not fully listening. He noticed that the professor had just dismissed the class. In a trance he packed away his things. It had been like this since Buffy left. He still loved her so much, but he couldn’t have her and he knew that. But it didn’t make things any easier. He shook his head trying to get rid of the images of her in his head and went towards the door. When he got outside he saw a beautiful girl standing by the door. He had seen her a few times but never spoken to her. She had long black hair, dark eyes and a very gothic look about her. She was stunning. When she saw Spike she walked over

“Hello Spike” she had an English accent, and he couldn’t help but think that it just fit her

“Hi, how do you know my name?” he wondered

“Oh, I’m sorry I overheard someone say it. I’m Drusilla” she introduced herself offering her hand. He hook it

“Nice to meet you pet”

“I was wondering, I haven’t seen you with anyone, so I wondered if maybe you’d like to go out with me sometime?” she suggested

Spike’s thought drifted to Buffy, the one he wanted and had lost. He had to get on with his life, he just didn’t know if he wanted to. They had promised each other however that they would go on with their lives. Keeping a special place in their hearts for each other. He looked back at the girl in front of him. She was beautiful, until he met Buffy she was exactly his time

“Sure” he decided “Why don’t we go to The Bronze tonight?”

“Oh that sounds wonderful, I’ll meet you there. Say around eight” she suggested

“Ok, see you then”

They said their goodbyes and parted ways.




The Garage was the hotspot in the part of LA where Buffy lived. It was kind of like the Bronze back in Sunnydale. Buffy walked in and saw Angel and Faith art a table, she went over

“Hey guys” she said as she reached them

“Hey B” Faith replied

“You look great” Angel complimented

She smiled “Thanks, I do don’t I” this got a snigger from Angel while Faith rolled her eyes. Buffy was wearing a pair of very low- riding, tight- fitting leather pants, She wore a low- cut black halter, and black high heeled boots. Her hair was pinned up. Faith wore a very similar only both her pants and top were leather.

“What does everyone want to drink?” Angel asked

“Vodka and Coke” Faith requested “Just a little drop coke and a whole lot of Vodka”

“Buffy?”

“just a coke for now, please” she ordered

“Ok, I’ll be back”

Buffy watched as he retreated to the bar before speaking to Faith

“So how are you tonight Faith?”

“you know me B, I’m five by five” she replied. Buffy rolled her eyes, that was always the reply when you asked Faith how she was. Angel was soon back at the table and dishing out the drinks. He sat Buffy’s in front of her. Faith excused herself for the ‘bathroom’ but they knew where she was really going.

“So Buffy, how are things with your mom?”

“Same as always. She just leaves me alone most of the time” she told him. She found it weird talking to him about her mom, the only person she had ever talked to about her was Spike. They shared a few minutes of random conversation. Faith came back and plopped herself into her seat, and holding out her hand

“Anyone feel like a little pick me up?”

Buffy eyed the pills in her friends hand

“Of course” Angel said
Faith turned to Buffy, more confidently than she felt she nodded her acceptance of the offer
“Yeah why not?”
She took the ecstasy pill from Faith’s hand, putting it in her mouth and swallowing it. Not long after Buffy, Faith and Angel were on the dance floor having the time of their lives. Buffy ground herself up against Angel as the dance. Faith was in the middle of a group of boys. Buffy wrapped her arms around Angels neck, moving her hips to the beat. She felt two hands take her hips from behind and turned to look into the laughing eyes of Faith. She leaned down to Buffy’s ear and whispered

“Let’s give these boys a show”
Buffy smiled a sly smile and reached a hand out for Faith. They began dancing, writhing and grinding against each other. Buffy had one hand draped around Faith’s neck, while Faith had one on Buffy’s hip as they moved to the music. The eyes of every male and a lot of females were glued to the two of them. Angel had never been so turned on in his life. Buffy saw this and decided to take the whole thing further, she pulled Faith closer, and pressed their lips together. Faith didn’t object, she was enjoying the effect they were having on the guys two much. When the kiss ended she saw the hunger in Angel’s eye but continued to dance with Faith.



Willow and Xander sat at their usual table in the Bronze. They were still together, but it didn’t feel the same being in this particular place without Buffy. They had spoken a few times, but mostly it was just a letter now and then. They were sitting chatting when something caught Willow’s eye. She moved a little to see better, and saw a face that she hadn’t seen since the day Buffy left. Spike. He spotted her and she waved him over. They watched as he came over, a beautiful dark haired girl following behind him

“Hiya Red” he greeted when he got to her table “whelp” he nodded at Xander

“Hey Spike” Willow chirped “how have you been?” she allowed a hint of sadness to creep into her voice when she asked the question

Spike glanced at Drusilla before answering

“Not bad, well not as bad as I was. I’m getting there” he revealed

“Good” Willow said, genuinely glad that the young man seemed to be ok, the day Buffy left she had though he seemed like he would never get over losing her. She smiled at him. Spike then remembered his date

“Oh, this is Drusilla. Drusilla this is Willow and Xander”

“Hello” Drusilla said

“Hi” Willow gave her a small wave, Xander said nothing

“Well I best be going” Spike said “Nice seeing you red”

“You too Spike. I’ll see you around sometime”

“Yeah” he led Drusilla away and to a table on the other side of the club

“Who were they?” questioned Drusilla when they were comfortably sitting down

“Willow and Xander?” at her nod he went on “oh just a friend of a friend”
He was trying to avoid having to talk about Buffy, but Drusilla was insistent

“What kind of friend? The little redhead girl seemed worried about you” she observed

Spike sighed and ran his fingers through his hair “An old girlfriend”

“Is that all?” she was determined to find out everything, she always got what she wanted

“Yeah, she moved away”

“You loved her” it was a statement not a question

“Yes” he agreed softly “I did. Very much” Drusilla seemed unhappy at his answer so he rushed to reassure her, he needed to attempt to move on
“But she’s gone now. We’re here”

“Yes we are” she purred seductively moving closer to him.



At the end of the night Buffy and her friends exited the club, walking towards Faith’s car for her ride home, Angel following behind her. He stopped her halfway there and started kissing down her neck, she tangled her fingers in his hair, pulling his head up and latching onto his lips. She kissed him passionately. Grinding into him, she could feel how hard he was and rubbed her knee up and down against his erection. When she heard him moan she finished the kiss and leaned into his ear

“I’ll see you later” she breathed before running over to the car and getting in, laughing at the bewildered look on his Faith as they sped away.



Chapter 9:A Surprising Phone Call



Buffy sat at the back of her history class, passing notes to Faith and Angel.

‘Hey Faith, what d’you wanna do tonight?”

“I’m five by five B. What do you suggest?”


Buffy looked over at Angel scribbling on another bit of paper.

“Hey, Angel, wanna go to the Garage tonight?”
She passed it to him and waited while he scanned the note, jotting down a reply

“Sure thing, babe.”

led a little, then passed another note in the direction of Faith.

‘The Garage. 8:30.”

Faith nodded and Buffy leaned over to whisper to her.

“Make sure you bring the stuff with you.” she instructed, trying to be as discreet as possible, but she wasn’t discreet enough.

“Miss. Summers, do you have something you wish to share with the class?” Miss Collins, the teacher asked in a stern voice.

Buffy sniggered, looking straight at her “We were just saying that. Well this class… bites.” she laughed as the teacher’s face turned three different shades of red.


“Buffy Summers I am just about sick of your attitude.” she yelled.

“Well then I guess we should excuse you to go to the bathroom.”

The whole class laughed at that statement, the teacher erupted in rage.

“That is it, get out of my classroom. You can go to the principle.” Buffy looked at her, shrugged her shoulders and stood up. As she made her way down the row Faith called out to her.

“Hey B, wait up, I’ll come with you.” she ran down to catch up.

“Me too.” chimed Angel, getting up from his own seat and meeting them at the door, Buffy smiled at the teacher and then walked out the door.

“Who feels like going for a drive?” Buffy suggested as they walked down the hall.





Spike and Drusilla were sat in the coffee house, the same coffee house where he used to meet Buffy three times a week, and sometimes more than that in that last month. They weren’t sitting in the same booth though, he couldn’t bring himself to sit there with anyone who wasn’t Buffy.

“Do you know what the pixies told me, my Spike?” Drusilla asked, a childlike smile on her face, Spike sighed. He still couldn’t get used to the way she talked about the stars and pixies, but she was nice enough, a little crazy, but he did like her. So he always put his reservations to the back of his mind.

“What did the say, Luv?

“They said, my Spike, was going to take me dancing tonight.”

Spike groaned “Dru, pet, I really don’t feel like it tonight.” he saw her begin to pout, it was the same look she got whenever she didn’t get her way.

“Please Spike, won’t you do it for princess.” she leaned in closer and in her most seductive voice she said “I’ll make it worth your while.”

“Dru.” he tried to protest, but she just fluttered her long eyelashes and he knew that there was no point in arguing. In the end she always got what she wanted.

“Alright, we’ll go dancing.” he agreed.

She broke into a smile again, bouncing in her seat clapping her hands. It was times like this that he realised just how childlike she really was.




Buffy squealed as the car tore down the street, headed for the secluded spot they went to often when they skipped. Buffy and Faith sat atop the seats of the convertible, throwing sultry looks to any guys who passed. They loved it, they kept it up until they got to the clearing, and Buffy and Faith both jumped out, waiting to be joined by Angel.
They sat on the hood of the car, Angel came and sat beside them, pulling a joint from his jean pocket.

“Anyone want a smoke?” he offered as he lit it, Buffy reached her hand out taking it from him and taking a couple of long drags. She passed it on to Faith who did the same before returning it to Angel.




Spike put his arm around Drusilla as they entered the Bronze. From the door he scanned the club for an empty table. Spotting one in the corner he guided Drusilla towards it. They sat down across from one another, a sexy beat began to play and Drusilla swayed in her seat to the music.

“Oh Spike, do you hear the beautiful music?”

“Yes Dru, I can hear it.” he said, trying not to get annoyed. It became tiresome when she was constantly acting like that.

“Come Spike,” she said reaching her hand out to him “I want to dance.”
He didn’t bother to resist, he allowed himself to be pulled into the crowd of dancers. She stood with her back pressed against his chest, one arm reached up, behind her to hold onto his neck. Spike held her by the neck as they swayed together to the song. Drusilla was lost to it. He let her go, she didn’t notice and he went in search of a drink. On his way to the bar he saw a familiar head of red hair at a nearby table, and decided to go over and say hello. As he got closer he saw that she was alone.

“Hey Red.” he said from behind her back, startling her a little, she looked over her shoulder and smiled a friendly smile when she saw him.

“Hey Spike,” she greeted “sit down.” she motioned to the seat beside her. He sat.

“No, whelp tonight?” he asked.

“No, we broke up.” she said sadly.

“I’m sorry, it’ll get better.” he sympathised.

“Really?” she sounded anxious, but Spike couldn’t lie to her.

“A little bit, over time.” He promised. It was the best he could do. Willow could read his thoughts though.

“You still miss her.” she stated.

“I do,” he agreed “but, I’m not gonna see her again, not for a while anyway. Her life is there now” his voice was sad, but firm. He believed that what he said was the truth.
“Have you spoken to her since she left?”

“No, it was too hard.” he confided in her “I didn’t want to, frankly I didn’t want to deal with the pain of speaking to her and not being able to see her. To hold her.”

“You should call.”

“I can’t.” he was determined on that matter. He wanted to move on.

“You should call,” Willow said more firmly “it may not change anything, it could change everything. Where’s your cell phone?”

Spike reached into his pocket pulling out the phone, holding it towards Willow, she played around for a few minutes pressing a few buttons then gave it back.

“That’s her number,” she told him “I suggest you use it.” she got up, kissed his cheek and walked out.





Joyce walked through the house picking up her mail, she was on her way out but wanted to see any important letters first. Her eye caught one from Buffy’s school, with a wary sigh she ripped the letter open. As she read the details of abusive and rude behaviour, skipping classes and the like she shook her head.

“Not again.” she said quietly to herself.

She decided she would have to deal with it later, she reached out to lift her keys from the hall table but they weren’t there. She guessed Buffy had taken the wrong ones again, and went in search of Buffy’s bag to get the spare set, As she rummaged she came across a smell plastic bag with a note attached.

‘Ecstasy: 4 tablets’
Joyce’s hand clasped over her mouth, she felt sick. She knew Buffy had gotten involved with some bad kids but she had never suspected that. She sat down on the couch, she had to think about what she was going to do, and she had to make a call.



Buffy pulled Angel into the cubicle, the door was barely closed before she undid his zipper and pulled them down around his knees. She then hitched up her short leather skirt and pulled her thong aside. She jumped up and wrapped her legs around his waist, kissing him passionately as she sank down on him. He switched them round so that he could sit on the toilet seat, allowing Buffy to ride him.


Three girls walked into the toilet of the club, giggling. As soon as they entered they heard a series of loud gasps and moans. They looked at each other, scrunching their noses up, before motioning to the door, and leaving again.


Buffy was riding Angel for all he was worth. They were panting for breath as she thrust repeatedly up and down on him. She pulled him into a kiss, but was stunned out of it when her phone rang.

“Ignore it.” Angel said, trying to control his voice.

“I can’t,” she panted “might be my mom.”


She reached into the pocket of her skirt and pulled out the phone flipping it open

“Hello.” she said breathily.

“Buffy?” the voice on the other end asked.

“Spike.” she gasped.

“You alright pet?” he asked concerned.

Buffy never stopped her movements, continuing to ride Angel, trying to hide their moans “Yeah, fine.”

“You sure.”

“I’m, ungh great.” she insisted, biting her lip to suppress a moan. She held onto Angel’s shoulders, letting him thrust up into her.

“Good, I just wanted to call and say, hey.” he told her “See how things were there.”

“Things are,” she paused a moment to bite down on Angel’s shoulder to hide the noises she was making “going fine.” she continued. "How have you been?”
Angel was thrusting furiously mow, he reached a hand between them, rubbing her clit, she thrust back into him

“I’m doing good. I was speaking to Willow earlier.”

“Oh, ok.” she was struggling now, so close she couldn’t believe she was holding the sounds in.

“Yeah, and I wanted to tell you that I got an internship at the high school.”

Buffy bucked wildly against Angel, she couldn’t hold back any longer “That’s great, Spike.” she gasped as she came. She couldn’t help but realise that it was once again his name on her lips, no matter what the circumstances. She suddenly was overwhelmed by guilt and she grasped the necklace he gave her, she got off Angel rearranging her clothes

“And Buffy,” Spike went on “I miss you.”

“I miss you too.” she said quietly.

“Well, I better go, bye. Take care of yourself, Luv.”

“Bye Spike, you too.” she pressed the off button, “Can you take me home please?” she said to Angel. The entire car drive was made without her speaking a word.



When she walked into her house she saw her mom and sister on the couch, when she saw Buffy come in Joyce looked pointedly at Dawn.

“Dawn, go upstairs please.”
For a change, the girl didn’t argue. She did as she was told. Buffy knew then that something was seriously wrong. She waited for her mom to explain. No words were used, Joyce held up the pills, and Buffy turned pale.

“Mom I-“

“Don’t even try.” Joyce said in a deathly calm voice, which worried Buffy more than If she would have screamed “You cannot talk your way out of this one Buffy. You’ve become worse than you were when we first moved away from here. I thought coming back here might be good for you.”

“Mom,” Buffy interrupted “you took me away from everything that was important to me when we left Sunnydale. I like my friends her, they’re different, but those people were important.”

Joyce looked her daughter square in the eye “You’ll be happy then, we’re going back. Because things couldn’t possibly be any worse than they have gotten here.”

“Why are you doing this? Just when I start to settle in-“

“Buffy, things were bad in Sunnydale, but never this bad. Dawn isn’t happy here, and to be quite honest you’re not either and that’s why you’re acting like this. Well, congratulations Buffy we’re going back. Oh and we leave the day after tomorrow. Goodnight.” Joyce left Buffy standing alone in the living room, contemplating if what her mother said was true. And thinking about Spike.


Chapter 10: Welcome Home



Buffy was once again standing in front of a car, waiting to move for the second time in just over three months. And it’s back to where she moved from in the first place. The people there to say goodbye are different this time. This time she has Angel and Faith. She walks up to Angel, wrapping her arms around his neck.

“Some birthday this has been” she remarked

She had turned seventeen the day before, that had been what she was celebrating with Angel the night her mother found the pills in her bag and announced the were going back to Sunnydale. The day of her birthday had been tense, her mom was angry with her, but try to put on a happy front for the sake of Dawn. Buffy wasn’t happy. She was just starting to get used to life in LA again, and she was being uprooted. She still had the last month of school to finish in Sunnydale too. She reverted her attention back to her boyfriend.

“I’ll come visit you,” he promised “as soon as possible.”
She gave a small smile.

“Ok, you better.”

“I hate that you have to leave already.” he sighed.

“I know, I don’t like the idea of leaving you either, but I can’t do anything about it.” she reminded him.

“I know, but I don’t have to like it,” he grumbled “Love you.”
Buffy froze, what was she meant to say? She cared about him, and she didn’t like the idea of leaving him, but she didn’t love him. Part of her always had Spike in her mind, and what happened in the club the other night had just made the feeling stronger. But what could she say to Angel? Nothing, so she leaned up and kissed him softly.

“Goodbye.” she said softly.

She turned to face Faith, Faith as always, showed no emotion.

“Se ya later, B.” she gave her a quick hug and then stood beside Angel. He was wearing a hurt expression and Faith was perfectly aware that it was because Buffy hadn’t said she loved him too. They watched as the car drove off, Faith didn’t give him a chance to brood though, he was her ride so she jumped in the car and beeped the horn, waiting for him to drive her home.



The drive that Sunday afternoon was mad in eerie silence. Buffy couldn’t help her mother’s cold attitude towards her. Joyce didn’t mean to be, but she had a funny feeling that Buffy’s attitude would
change again once they were back n Sunnydale and she was back with her real friends. She also hoped that when she was, she would see sense and finish with Angel, or that he would at least lose his influence over her. She hadn’t forbid him from visiting in the hope that the relationship would fizzle out when he got tired of having to go back and forth, and also because she knew there was no point. Buffy would only get worse if she tried it. In the meantime she would have to wait and see, but she was still angry too.




Buffy grew a tad excited when they passed the ‘Welcome to Sunnydale’ sign, it was easy to think of it as going home. Sure she was still annoyed at being moved around again, but she couldn’t deny that she missed the place, and the people in it. A few in particular. None of who had any idea she was coming back. Well, some would find out at school the next day. Twenty minutes later the pulled into Rovello Drive, the same street they lived in before. Not the same house,
instead of 1620, they pulled up a few doors down at 1630. Buffy soon learned though that the houses were exactly the same. As she lifted her case and walked through the door she couldn’t help the tiny smile and the thought in her head ‘welcome home’ she took her case upstairs and found the same room that had been hers in the previous house. She
unpacked her clothes and hung them in the closet. After a quick break for dinner, she put everything the way she wanted it and decided on an early night. School tomorrow.




Buffy was woken early by an excited Dawn bouncing up and down on her bed.


“Buff, get up.” she squealed.

“Why?” she groaned.

“Because, Buffy, we get to go back to our own schools. Our real friends, come on Buff, you should be happy.” the young girl said.

Buffy sat up in bed and took in her sister’s excited face.

“I am,” she told her “it’s just, well things are different now. I’m different now.”

“No Buffy,” Dawn disagreed “you don’t have to be, you don’t have to be the person you turned into in LA, you can be the Buffy that was happy here.” she didn’t wait for a response, she just ran back out of the room. Buffy looked at the clock and got out of bed, contemplating her sister’s words. Deciding that she didn’t have time to think about it she picked her clothes out of her closet and went for a shower.




She walked down the halls of Sunnydale High again, looking around for people she knew. Many of the boys were looking her up and down, not surprising considering her ensemble. A pair of low- riding, very tight jeans, a blood red backless halter top, a belly chain, and high heeled boots. Her hair was flowing around her shoulders. As she approached her locker, she was tapped on the shoulder, she was met by Cordelia Chase upon turning around.

“Oh goody,” she muttered under her breath, pasting a fake smile on her face “Hi Cordy.”

“Well well.” the popular girl said looking Buffy up and down “If it isn’t Buffy Summers. Didn’t know you were coming back.”

“Well I am.” she said as if stating the obvious .

“I can see that.” she said coolly “So how was LA?”

Buffy almost fainted in shock, Cordelia Chase, being nice to her. That never happened.

“It was LA.” she replied, unsure if the other girl was up to
something or not.




From a few feet away Willow and Xander looked at the side of Buffy, unsure if it was actually her.

“Wills, do you really think?”

“I don’t know, she would have told us if she was coming back, right?” she asked, she wanted to believe that her friend would have let them know. But they hadn’t really spoken in the time she had been gone.

“I guess there’s only one way to find out.” he said.

“Yeah.” Willow agreed, leading the way towards the person they thought was Buffy. Neither of the two girls saw them approach as they were caught up in conversation. Willow tentatively tapped her on the shoulder and waited for her to turn round.

Buffy was cut off mid sentence when someone tapped her shoulder. She had no idea who it could be, she slowly turned round to be greeted by two very familiar faces.

“Buffy!?” Willow exclaimed, both in shock and excitement.

“Hey Willow.” she returned almost shyly, partly afraid of their
reaction.

“Hey Buff.” came Xander’s voice.

“Hey Xan.”

“How you been?” he asked.

“It’s a long story.” she admitted, not sure how much she wanted to tell them

“Well, how about we make time to listen. Tonight at the Bronze.” he suggested. Buffy, as worried as she was couldn’t help the happiness she felt. So she readily agreed.

“Sure. Sounds great.”

“Great,” Willow said “well, better get to class, see you at lunch?”

Buffy nodded a yes and said her goodbyes, going in the direction of the office to do what had to be done.




That night after her homework was done under her mother’s watchful eye, she hated that her mom was watching her every move, but she had to put up with it. After it was done, she got ready for the Bronze.
She felt anxious as she walked through the door to another place she hadn’t been to in so long. But after spotting Willow and Xander, and sitting down with them things started to seem more familiar.

“So, Buff, what happened in LA?” Xander asked her.

“Not much, I met a few people, started dating a guy. Did basically the same things I did here, including failing school. Dawn wasn’t happy there and after a bit of thinking mom decided to come back.” she gave the sketchy details of events, leaving out the more
colourful events.

“New boyfriend.” Willow repeated, she had already decided not to mention Spike was seeing some one and she still wasn’t going to.

“Yeah,” Buffy nodded “his name’s Angel. He’s coming down to visit soon.”

“Cool.” Xander said standing up and excusing himself

“So, what’s been new here?” Buffy questioned, praying she would mention Spike.

“Well Xander and I broke up.” she said, with the sadness creeping into her voice.

“Oh, I’m sorry Wills.” she sympathised.

“It’s ok, things just didn’t work out.” she shut up quickly when she saw Xander coming back. He had three drinks, he sat back down, giving Buffy and Willow a drink each.

He held his up and said

“Just one thing left to say” he looked at Willow and then they looked at Buffy, both raising their glasses the said .

“Welcome home Buffy.”

“Yeah Buff, welcome home.”

A smile spread on her face, her mind floated back to Dawn’s words that moment, and decided that maybe she was right.


Chapter 11: Seeing You Again



Angel had promised Buffy that he would visit soon, and he had kept that promise. She was woken up at 10am the following Saturday morning. Her mom and Dawn were out for the day so she was by herself, she stumbled downstairs as the bell was rung repeatedly. She opened the door and felt very self conscious when she saw a smiling Angel on the doorstep. She done a double- take feeling like her eyes were deceiving her. However, when he reached out and hugged her, she knew he was real.

“Oh my god” she yelled excitedly “Angel, I didn’t expect to see you here”

“I told you I’d come and see you soon” he reminded her letting her go. She remembered that she was in just her pyjama’s so she stood away from the door and ushered him inside. She leaned up and kissed him softly

“I’m glad you’re here” she told him as she pulled back from the kiss

“Me too. So what are we going to do today?” he asked her as he plopped down on the couch, making himself comfortable and putting his feet on the coffee table in front of him. Buffy grimaced a little at that but she was glad that he was there so she decided to just let it go.

“How about I show you around today, and we can go to the Bronze tonight?” she was hopeful that he would agree, even though Willow and Xander had broken up they were still close, and they had welcomed her back with open arms. But now that she didn’t have a boyfriend living nearby it felt good to have Angel there, he was that was only hers. Her friend, her boyfriend.

“Sure” he shrugged, indifferent, he was just happy to see her. It had been terrible not having her around this last week and he was just willing to spend time with her. And have some fun, if it was offered to him.



He waited in the living room while she went to get changed, in the last week her dress sense had changed once again. Somehow she didn’t feel right wearing the clothes she wore in LA, in Sunnydale. He was surprised by what she was wearing when she came in, it wasn’t the leather he was used to, she was wearing a denim skirt that sat mid thigh, and a pale pink halter and her hair was up in a ponytail. But he ignored how unusual it was to see her like that, and instead went with complimenting her

“You look … good” he decide was the best way to go after a brief hesitation. Buffy could tell he was disappointed with the new look, but she liked it so she was going to say nothing. She smiled

“Shall we go” by the time they left it was 11:30. They drove to main street and parked the car. After getting out they decided to get a coffee.

“How about here?” Angel suggested. Buffy looked at the place they were standing outside, memories of tutoring sessions, and kisses with Spike flooded her mind when they were standing outside of the coffee house where all of her sessions had taken place. Angel saw the strange look on her face,

“Something wrong?” he asked her, he noticed that she had been preoccupied quite a few times while they had been out.

“No she lied “here’s fine” he held the door open for her and she went inside. When she looked around she saw that there was only one free booth, it was the same one she always sat at when she was there with Spike. Angel began walking towards it, Buffy grabbed his arm to stop him.

“Let’s sit on the couch” she motioned to the black leather couch near the counter “much comfier”

“Ok” he sounded confused, but he brushed off her behaviour and followed her to the couch, After ordering their drinks they settled on the couch. They sat in awkward silence, Buffy searched her head for something to say

“So, how was school this week?” it was the first thing that popped into her head that she had in common with him.

“Same as last week, only you weren’t there” he said, running finger through her hair “It was weird, we missed you”

“Tell me about everything that happened” she insisted. She hated feeling so awkward, but part of her really did want to know

“Well, Cooper threw Faith out of Bio. Said she was rude and obnoxious. I failed my bio quiz, Faith failed her bio quiz. We skipped every day of English. I got sent to Ms. Morrison three times. And Faith got sent five” he filled her in. She let out a snort of laughter

“So nothing unusual” she observed

“Not a thing” he couldn’t help his own laugh.

Things became less tense after that and they spent the next 45 minutes chatting about how their weeks had gone at their respective schools.


They left the coffee shop and started to walk down the street, she pointed out the different places like the cinema, and book store and the magic shop. While they were walking she slipped her hand into his. They walked for a few minutes in comfortable silence, as the passed a shoe store she stopped to look in the window. She admired the shoes, while Angel waited, impatiently, beside her. Finally she heard him tapping his foot and smiled sheepishly. She dragged herself away and took his hand again. She looked up and saw a head of white hair coming in the other direction, holding hands with a beautiful dark haired woman. She had to get away

“You know, I really liked a pair of those shoes back there. Let’s go back so I can try them on” she tugged at his hand but he didn’t budge

“We’ll be going back that way later, come on I want to see what’s down her” he said. He was insisted, so she took a breath and walked forward.




Spike and Dru were walking down main street, he was taking her out to lunch since he couldn’t take her out that night, he had an assignment due on Monday so he had to spend the whole weekend doing it. She held tightly onto his hand. Suddenly he saw someone whom he would have sworn was Buffy, she was with a tall brunette man. As he got closer there was no disputing it, that was Buffy. He knew there was no point in trying to turn back, he would probably have to see her sooner or later. He only wished that it wasn’t when their new counterparts were there. And he knew the guy must have been her boyfriend as she was holding his hand the exact same way that Dru was holding his. They were getting closer and closer to one another until they had stooped two feet from each other

“Buffy” Spike said

“Spike, how have you been?”

“Good, I’ve been good. You” he returned the question

“So, so” she replied

“Who is this my Spike? Aren’t you going to introduce us? Drusilla asked, looking Buffy over suspiciously

“Um, Dru, this is Buffy. She’s an old… friend” Buffy understood that that was the safest explanation, however, Angel didn’t want to leave it at that.

“What kind of friend?” he pushed, Spike rolled his eyes at the boy’s jealousy fuelled question, while Buffy sighed as she answered

“Spike was my boyfriend before I moved to LA. Happy now?” she was annoyed that she had to explain herself to Angel.

“Isn’t he a bit old for you?” he went on, he didn’t like the look of the guy, or more specifically the way he looked at Buffy. Buffy was his.

“Angel, I’m not going to get into this ok” she dismissed his question, and her tone told him that the conversation had come to an end. Drusilla glared at her but said nothing, so she resumed her conversation with Spike.

“So, on the phone the other day, you said something about an internship at the school?” she recalled their brief conversation the previous week. Spike’s face lit up at the fact she remembered

“Yeah, I’m gonna be working as a teachers assistant for the English department. I’ve been thinking about teaching and next year is my last year so I thought it was a good idea. I start after the summer” he informed her

“Sounds great.” She was genuinely pleased for him, she knew how much he loved what he studied and he had often talked during their sessions how he quite liked the idea of being a teacher. He really liked helping her.

Spike glanced at her and noticed something around her neck. He couldn’t resist the urge to reach out and touch it. Her necklace

“You still wear it” he said the words so softly they were barely audible

“Never took it off” he raised his head slightly and looked straight into her eyes, and for a moment it was like the past three months never happened. Angel noticed their moment too and rushed to put an end to it

“Kept what?” he asked as he turned around, he saw the necklace and glared at Spike “Nice, where’d you get it?”

“I gave her it” Spike said defiantly, he wouldn’t hide the fact that he had loved her, that part of him still did.

Angel pulled it from Spike’s fingers and turned it over reading the inscription “ Together in our hearts always. I love you. S” he read it out loud and looked at Spike “How sweet, but not so true, see she loves me now. So get over” he got in Spike’s face. Spike was upset that he made the words that had come straight from his heart sound so meaningless. Buffy was just as angry, she had never told Angel she loved him, she didn’t know if she did, but she did know that she still cared about Spike, partly still loved him. And those words meant something to her. She grasped Angel by the shoulder

“leave it Angel” she demanded “you may not like it but Spike and I care for each other even if we’re not together anymore. He’ll always be my friend. Get over it” She looked at Spike apologetically “I’m sorry. But forget him, I love the necklace, I’ll never take it off” Spike gave her that sane shy smile that only she ever saw anymore

“Thanks” he said softly

She smiled warmly at him “You’re welcome. Well, we better go. Nice seeing you Spike. We’ll have to meet up again soon” she said

“Yeah, nice seeing you too, luv”

With a final wave she walked on, she didn’t take Angel’s hand again. In fact she didn’t speak to him for the rest of the day. She still hadn’t spoken to him by the time they reached the Bronze.


They went inside, Buffy wearing leather pants, and a blue halter. But not as revealing as what she would have worn in LA. She had only just sat down when Angel disappeared and she feared for the worst. He fears proved reasonable when he came back and sat down next to her

“Look what I got us” he said proudly, holding the pills towards her

“Thanks for the offer Angel, but I really don’t think so” she turned them down and this surprised him

“Come on baby, you know you want to” he whispered in her ear




Spike walked into the Bronze, Drusilla on his arm. He hadn’t been able to get any work done. Since seeing her that afternoon, she had been constantly on his mind. After trying to work for a couple of hours with no success, he gave up and called Drusilla. Of course, she wanted to go dancing. As soon as he entered he saw her. After sending Drusilla to find a table, he headed in her direction to say hi. When he was close enough he saw Angel hold out his hand and his eyes widened when he saw what lay in it. He moved closer so that he could hear what they were saying without them noticing him

“Angel, no, I just I don’t. I’m trying to stop all that” she insisted, but he refused to back down

“You used to do it all the time in LA” he reminded her

“This isn’t LA” she shot back

“But think of all the fun you’ll have. And it’ll clear your mind. Calm you down” this was what swayed her. She had been unable to think of anything but Spike since that afternoon.


Spike looked on furious as she reached out and took one of the pills from him. He kept watching as she put it in her mouth and swallowed it. He wanted to go over and shake her and tell her how stupid she was being. He wanted to hit Angel for insisting that she take it. But he couldn’t. It wasn’t his business, she wasn’t his anymore. So he sighed and went to find Drusilla.


Angel had been right, she felt much better now. She was still thinking about Spike but not nearly as much. She was in the middle of the group of dancers grinding against Angel. As thee beat of the song got faster her dancing got wilder. She was shaking her hip, moving her head from side to side. Having a ball.


Spike made his way through the crowd, he knew what everyone was watching, but he wanted to get closer, keep an eye on her. He had slipped away when Dru had excused herself to go to the bathroom. As he got closer her could see her dancing wildly.


Suddenly her mouth went dry and she felt dizzy. It was too soon to be coming down from the high the pills had put her on, she had just taken it. She became dizzier and dizzier. The next thing anyone knew, she was flat out on the floor.


Spike saw her fall and rushed towards her, pushing people out of his path. When he got to her, Angel was leaning over her. He pushed him aside and knelt beside her. He felt her forehead, she was warm and sweaty. He tapped her shoulder to see if she would wake up

“Buffy” he said “Buffy” he repeated. He didn’t get any response. She was deathly pale and she wasn’t responding to him. He didn’t think twice, he scooped her up in his arms and made his way to the door. Angel blocked his way

“What do you think you’re doing” the brunette demanded

“I’m taking her to the hospital”

“I don’t think so. I’m her boyfriend, I’ll take her in my car” he sounded cocky and sure of himself. Spike laughed at the thought

“Listen here, peaches, if you think I’m gonna let some idiot who’s high on ecstasy and god knows what else, who is also responsible for her being in this state, drive her to the hospital. You’re crazy. Now get out of my way” he stormed by him

“Hey, get back here” Angel screamed. Spike ignored him, continuing on his way out of the club, Angel close behind. Dru also came out of the bathroom then and saw her boyfriend leaving without a word, she made her way over. As he reached the door, Willow and Xander came in and looked at Spike

“Spike what’s going on, where are you taking Buffy?” Willow asked confused

“Hospital” was the only explanation he gave, as he walked right by them. It was all they needed, the followed behind him, running all the way to his car and getting in.

An enraged Angel and Drusilla stood in the car park, glaring daggers at the black Desoto as it sped away.

Chapter 12: Help




Spike ran through the hospital doors, Willow and Xander close behind, he ran straight to the reception to be greeted with a concerned looking nurse

“You have to help her” his voice was anxious and begging, he was terrified that something would happen.

“Ok, but first you have to tell me what’s wrong” the nurse was patient seeing how upset the man in front of her was

“Oh, I think” he tried hard to come up with an excuse, he couldn’t ell the whole truth or her mom would find out and he wanted to avoid that if possible “I think someone spiked her drink, I know there was ecstasy going around the club where we were” he had to tell her that much or they couldn’t help, Willow and Xander wore distressed looks on their face as soon as drugs were mentioned, but they would have to wait for Buffy to better. It was her place to tell them.


“Ok, well, these firms need to be filled out” she handed him a clipboard. He didn’t know many of the details and told the nurse so, but he added something else

“Also, her mum is gone for the weekend on business, is there any chance you can wait until she’s awake let her tell you.”

Willow nudged him “She usually keeps those details in her purse” she said quietly, Willow who was holding her bag rummaged through, finding the relevant information. He quickly filled them out, handed the clipboard back to the nurse and waited


“Ok, this way. We’ll get her seen to” the nurse directed them down the hall to a room with a lot of machines. From Spike’s viewpoint it was scary and intimidating. She was laid out on a hospital bed, Spike stayed by her until a doctor came in a few minutes later. The nurse spoke to him, explaining the details. The doctor spoke directly to Spike then

“Ok, you’ll have to wait outside” the doctor didn’t wait for him to leave, he set about putting a tube down Buffy’s throat

“What are you doing?” Spike asked anxiously

“We have to pump her stomach. Now please wait outside” more nurses were coming in now and Spike could tell that the doctor was becoming impatient. He let himself be ushered outside, where Willow and Xander were now waiting.

“What’s happening?” Willow asked him as soon as he came through the door. She was worried. Buffy was her best friend, she couldn’t even want to think about anything happening to her.

“They’re pumping her stomach” he didn’t explain any further and they didn’t ask. They waited outside the door in silence. Silently praying that everything would be okay. Numerous thoughts were running through Spike’s head, but one suddenly took over. Joyce.

“Joyce, we have to call her, what are we gonna say?” he was panicking, how was he supposed to explain that her daughter was in hospital because she had taken drugs. More importantly, how could he tell her that he had saw her and not done anything to stop her. That was when the guilt overtook him, if he hadn’t been so determined that he had to let her live her life and make her own decisions, maybe she wouldn’t be in hospital. The thought was present in his mind until Willow broke through the haze

“I already called her” she saw the Spike looked at her, a look that was hoping she hadn’t told her what happened “II told her that Buffy was staying with me because she and Angel got into a fight and he went back to LA”

“Thanks Willow” the relief was evident in his words. He could figure out everything else later. Once he knew she was okay.

He leaned back against the wall, letting his guilt overtake him again, Willow noticed straight away and placed a hand on his arm
“It wasn’t your fault Spike”

Spike only looked at her, shaking his head in disagreement “I saw her, I saw him give them to her and I didn’t stop her. I thought I had to let her make her own decision because she’s not mine anymore” his voice was hoarse, tears threatening to spill.

“No Spike, she’s not. I know that hurts but at the end of the day you couldn’t have stopped her anyway. You should know by now that if Buffy wants to do something then she does it. It’s not your fault” she couldn’t say anything else to reassure him. Words didn’t always work. So they went back to waiting.


Forty- five minutes or so after she had been taken in the doctor emerged from the room

“She’s still out. We’re going to move her to a room now, then we just have to wait until she wakes up. Only one of you can stay with her” he told them. It was strictly business, he didn’t let any emotion into his voice. He went back inside and followed behind the nurses as they wheeled her bed to a room. The three others following them.


When they were outside the door Willow as the first person to say anything

“You should stay Spike”

Spike disagreed “Don’t think it’s appropriate Red, not my place. You’re her best friend you should stay.”

Xander however seemed to be in agreement with Willow “She’s right Spike, you should stay. I have a feeling she’s going to need you when she wakes up” his voice was solemn, but insightful. Spike couldn’t help but think the boy had a lot of wisdom inside of him. He didn’t say a word, just nodded.

After Willow and Xander had been in for a moment to see her, Spike was alone. Standing outside the room door, almost afraid to go inside. He slowly turned the handle and stepped inside. Tears flooded his eyes when he saw her lying there. Looking so frail. He went over and pulled a seat over to sit beside her, grasping her hand he laced a soft kiss on her knuckles

“Get better, luv” he pleaded “I need you. I need you around, care too much about you to lose you.” A tear crept down his cheek as he continued to utter soft words to her

“You better wake up, I don’t want to have gone to the trouble of tutoring you for months for it to be a waste of time. Maybe I can do it again” the words he was saying was anything to make her wake up. They weren’t working, he laid his head on her chest and cried.



Buffy finally awoke early next morning, she felt a heavy weight on her chest and looked down. She saw a flash of blonde hair and memories of the night before came back to her. Taking the pill, being cheerful one minute and then dizzy. That was the last thing she remembered. She nudged his head weakly. He hadn’t been in a sound sleep so it was enough to rouse him, his heart leapt when he looked up and saw her eyes open and the tears fell again. Tears of relief

“Luv, thank god you’re okay” he said, reaching out to stroke her cheek. She gave a small smile to him, then tried to speak, her voice hoarse

“What happened?”

“The ecstasy you took was dodgy” he told her. His voice held no judgement in it. Buffy was glad of that

“How did you know?”

“I saw you. I wanted to stop you but I couldn’t it wasn’t up to me” his eyes lowered, they were full of sadness, and also anger at Angel


“Did you bring me?” she asked

“Yeah, wasn’t letting that wanker drive you while he was high” this time his voice was dripping with venom, Buffy burst into tears. He got up and sat at the edge of her bed wrapping his arms around her

“shh, luv, it’s ok.” He whispered in her hair “everything’s gonna be ok”

“I’m so sorry” she cried “my mom will kill me”

“She doesn’t know. And I noticed on your insurance details that your dad deals with it still so she doesn’t have to know” he thought that might make her feel better, but she only cried harder. He felt helpless, no longer knowing how to comfort her. His old instincts towards he began to kick in however and soon he was soothing her the way he had all those months earlier

“Shush, baby, it’s ok. Tell me what’s wrong” his voice was pleading

“Help me Spike, please” she begged

“How can I help you, tell me what I have to do”

“I don’t want to be like this. I took the drugs in LA, to hide the pain, but then I couldn’t stop. It’s only when I’m out but, I don’t want to do it anymore. Help me” she sobbed into his chest after she finished, he ran a hand soothingly through her hair

“Of course I’ll help you. You know I will always be there for you” She looked up upon hearing his words and their eyes connected, his breath caught in his throat, he saw the girl he fell in love with and he still loved her, he knew he shouldn’t but he couldn’t help it. He lowered his head and caught her lips in a kiss, it was soft and slow and healing. They broke apart quickly. They fell back into another kiss, more passionate this time. Seeking comfort and the feelings that had been there before, neither could deny feelings still existed. They were interrupted by the door creaking open and Spike jumped up. The doctor came in

“You’re awake, good. I’m just going to do some checks”

After he was done the doctor looked at them in turn and then landed his gaze on Buffy again

“Ok, you should be able to go soon. I just have to get the relevant papers filed.” He told them before leaving again.

Buffy and Spike looked at each other

“This can’t happen” Spike said finally “we said we were moving on. I don’t want to hurt Dru” he explained

“Yeah and I have Angel” she said softly

Spike was incredulous “You’re staying with him?” She lowered her eyes “I know he’s not perfect but he does care about me. I just need someone. I want to give him one last chance. But please say you’ll still help me. Tart tutoring me again, having you to talk to might help”

He stepped closer “I said I would help you and I will, no matter what” he kissed her on the head and then looked at her “Now get dressed so we can leave soon”
She nodded and got out of the bed, going towards the small toilet in the room. Spike waited in the room while she changed. A knock came on the door and In walked Angel

“What are you doing here?” he asked angrily, he was desperate to hit him, but not with Buffy just a few feet away

“I’m here to take my girlfriend home” he emphasised the word ‘my’ but Spike only laughed in his face

“Don’t think so mate” he looked at Angel preparing to say something else when Buffy came out of the bathroom

“Angel” she said when she saw him. He went over and hugged her whispering sorry’s in her ear. She didn’t accept in words in fact she didn’t respond at all, but Angel was willing to accept that as forgiveness.

“You ready to go?” he questioned

“Not yet and I think Spike should take me home”

“Why?” he was irritated, he didn’t like Spike, didn’t trust him

“Well my mom thinks that I’m staying at Willow’s and you are back in LA” Spike had explained this to her by yelling through the door while she changed. And honestly she wasn’t sure yet how to deal with Angel. Angel was obviously unhappy, but he didn’t say it

“Ok then” he kissed her, hard on the lips, claiming his territory. Spike couldn’t help the small smile, he had gotten there first, and he had already kissed her this morning. Angel smirked at him as he said goodbye to Buffy and left.

The doctor came in straight after telling Buffy she could go. After he was gone Spike turned to her

“Ready to go?” he asked

“Yeah” She followed Spike out, walking beside him through the halls. The kiss was playing on her mind and she didn’t even think about what she was doing when she reached out and grasped his hand when they reached the parking lot, nor did Spike when he clasped them tighter together.


Chapter 13: Holding Strong... Mostly





After Spike had dropped Buffy home after the hospital, she had spoken
to her mom. She hadn’t told her anything about the previous night’s
events but they had spoken about how Buffy felt moving back, how she
could improve her grades that sort of thing. Buffy had told her that
Spike was starting her tutoring lessons again, but that she didn’t
have to worry as they both were seeing different people. Although she
didn’t tell her daughter, Joyce wouldn’t mind Buffy getting back
together with Spike. Sure it was seeing Buffy with him that had
pushed her to move in the first place, but she had seen in the month
they were together how much they cared for one another. And Buffy had
been miserable in LA, she believed that was the reason for the way
she had behaved. But she had to let her daughter decide these things
for herself so she said nothing.


They had talked about general things, it was really just re-opening
the lines of communication between them that had been closed off for
so long. Both of them felt guilty for it. And both felt better after
they had talked. That had been three weeks previously and Buffy was
going to her ninth lesson with Spike that afternoon. Finals started
on Monday and then it was summer vacation, and she wanted to do well.
Spike had been helping her a lot, just like he had promised. She had
decided she didn’t want to do any kind of drugs and that included
smoking pot and so far she had been doing good. Angel hadn’t been
back down but he called most days. One thing Buffy and Spike had
never mentioned was their kiss that day in the hospital, both were
afraid of dragging up old feelings that couldn’t be acted upon so
they left the subject alone.



Buffy was lounging around on the couch watching television before she
left for her session in an hour, she had just flipped the channel to
her favourite talk show when the phone rang. She went to answer the
cordless in the hall.

“Hello.” she answered into the receiver.

“Hey Baby.” Angel’s voice came from the other end.

“Angel, how are you?” she knew she was keeping the conversation
formal but it had become a habit over the last few weeks.

“I miss you.” he told her.

“Miss you too.” it was an insincere sentiment, truth was she hadn’t
been missing him since her sessions with Spike started again, but she
couldn’t exactly tell him that. She was about to say something else
when the doorbell rang, she carried the phone with her to answer,
when she threw it open Angel was standing in front of her with his
phone held to his ear and a smile on his face.

“Surprise.” he said into the phone before switching the off button
and kissing her, it took a moment for her to respond. And when she
did respond it wasn’t as enthusiastic as he had expected, but he
ignored it and went inside, she walked dazedly back to the living
room.

“You know what let’s sit on the back porch.” he said, she was still
lost in her own world. She hadn’t seen him since the hospital and
when he kissed her she had compared it to when Spike kissed her. She
sat on the porch beside him and watched him dig around in her pocket.
As he did he looked at her expectantly and she guessed he was waiting
for her to say something. She said the only thing she could think of.

“Angel as pleasant a surprise as this is, I’m going out soon.”

“Where?” he asked.

“Meeting a friend.” she answered cryptically.

“What friend?” he urged, he knew what she was going to say but he
wanted to hear it anyway.

“Spike.” she mumbled. His possessiveness was testing, she didn’t like
having to tell him where she was going and who with. She was her own
person after all. She could see his anger.

“Why?” it was said in a way that demanded an answer. As far as Angel
was concerned Buffy was his, so why meet with Spike.

“Because, does it really matter?” she sighed. She didn’t have time
for his moods.

“Yes it does.” he said.

“Fine, he’s tutoring me.”

He laughed, she couldn’t believe he was laughing at her “You need a
tutor?” a fresh wave of laughter took him over.

Buffy stood up placing her hands on her hips.

“Yeah, I do. And the tutor is Spike, I have finals next week and I
want to do well. I don’t want to disappoint people anymore.”

Angel tried to look more sombre and supportive. ”I’m sorry, I didn’t
mean it.”

“Yeah well whatever.”

He held a hand towards her “Come sit with me.” he gave her a sad look
and pulled her down next to him, and went into his pocket, and Buffy
didn’t like what he took out. A joint. She felt very uncomfortable.
He lit it up and took a drag. He did this a few more times before
holding it in her direction. His face was a picture of astonishment
when she shook her head in silent refusal.

“Come on Buff, you know you want to.” he urged.

“No, thank you.” she was trying hard not to give in. It was easy when
he wasn’t around to give her the drugs but now that he was here it
wasn’t so easy.

“You do. You need to loosen up.” he was trying to persuade her. She
took it from him and put it to her lips. She wanted to smoke it, but
a voice inside her head stopped her. She pulled it away and looked at
it before throwing it on the ground and stomping it out.

“Hey, are you crazy?” Angel yelled.

“I didn’t want it.” she replied.

“I did,” he bellowed, she had never seen him like this before and it
scared her a little “This isn’t you Buffy. The real Buffy would have
been the first one to light it.”

She shook her head fiercely, disagreeing “No, that wasn’t me. This
is. I don’t want that anymore Angel. If you can’t accept that go back
to LA.” she looked at her watch and ran for the door leaving him
standing in her backyard.




She ran to main street, all the way to the coffee house, she needed
to talk. And it had to be to Spike. She saw him at their booth as
soon as she got through the door and ran towards her.


Spike looked up when he saw her standing by the table, he knew
immediately that something was wrong. She looked upset and wondered
if something had happened with her mom.

“You ok, pet” his concern was genuine as he helped her slip into the
seat across from him, her drink already on the table.

“I need to talk to you.” she said breathlessly.

“Of course.” She knew she could always talk to him, he would always
be there for her.

“Angel came down today-“

Spike jumped right in when he heard that, assuming the worst “What
did that ponce do now? Did he hurt you, did he-?” Buffy put a hand on
his arm to shush him.

“No, but he did bring pot and I don’t know hat else with him.” she
expected him to say something so she waited. But he didn’t he was
waiting for her to go on with the story, he was there to listen.

“Anyway,” she went on “we were on the porch and he brought out a
joint. He handed it to me, I tried to resist but I took it from him.
He was being so persuasive. It was easy when he wasn’t around but
when he was there giving it to me, it was hard.”

Spike nodded in understanding “Buffy, It’s okay if you have a
setback. It happens to everyone, but don’t let him talk you into
something you don’t want.” his voice was even but soft.

“I didn’t, I had it at my lips ready to smoke it and then I heard a
voice in my head that stopped me.”

“Whose Voice?” he asked, she looked over and smiled a little at him.

“Yours,” she admitted softly “you stopped me. I heard you speak to
me. Telling me that you would help me. Always be there for me, and
always care. And knowing that made me see that someone was there. I
didn’t have to dull the pain because I had someone to speak to about
it.” it was hard to confide all of this in him but she needed to do
it. She needed to know that he had helped her and that she
appreciated it and telling him that was the best way she knew how to
do it.


Spike place a hand over hers and looked into her eyes.

“I meant it, I will always be there. And I want you to know how proud
I am of how well you’ve done these last few weeks, not just where the
drugs are concerned. But school everything. You should be proud too.”
he told her. He believed everything he said to be true, he truly was
proud and he felt he and her mom and Buffy herself had a lot to feel
proud off. She smiled by way of thanks and their eyes met. When they
did their hearts began beating in their chests. They looked away,
breaking that connection. Buffy saw the clock on the far wall and was
surprised to see that their hour had passed. She had taken a lot of
time between the things that they were saying trying to find the
right words. Trying to sort out her feelings. Spike asked her what
she was looking at and she pointed in the direction of the clock.
Spike was equally surprised, their time was up and they hadn’t done
any studying, but Buffy had to get home to go with her mom that day
so they had to go.

“Best be off then, luv.” he stood up gathering their things.

“I don’t know what I’m gonna do now. Finals start on Monday.” she was
stressing she had been depending on that last session.

“Tell you what, I’ll come over to your house tomorrow and we’ll have
the session then.” he offered as the left the coffee house.

Buffy instinctively threw her arms around him. “Thank you, thank you,
thank you so much.” she chanted. She was grateful. She had been doing
better but she needed the session for her confidence.

“No problem, Luv.” it was a sincere offer, if she needed his help in
any way she would get it. They walked a little further up the street,
Buffy stopped turning to him, she kissed him on the cheek, “Thanks.”
she whispered, and then their eyes met. The next thing she knew his
lips were on hers, and it felt so good. When they pulled apart she
looked at him gain, and she wanted him. More than she ever had. She
looked behind her and took his hand, dragging him up the alley near
the back of the coffee house. The same one from all those months ago.
But this time he wouldn’t stop her and she knew it. When she was sure
they were out of view she kissed him again.


The kiss was passionate and their tongues duelled for dominance. Her
hands travelled up and down his back, while his buried themselves in
her hair. They were moaning into each others mouths, Their need for
each other all- consuming. Buffy brushed her hand down his chest,
over his stomach until she came to his groin. Rubbing the hard bulge
there. He moaned into the kiss again and Buffy couldn’t take any
more. The moisture was pooling between her legs. Without a second
thought she lowered his zipper freeing him.


Spike had a fleeting thought about his girlfriend but he brushed it
aside. He was fully aware of what he was doing and he wasn’t guilty.
He pulled her skirt up a bit and pulled her panties aside. He rubbed
along her slit a few times, making sure she was ready. He hoisted her
up a bit so that she could wrap her legs around his waist, and then
she sunk down on him. It was a feeling neither had thought they would
feel again, and it brought tears to their eyes. He began to thrust
slowly, trying to savour it. She rose herself up and down on him as
much as she could from her position. After a few minutes when it was
becoming too much he spun them so that she was against the wall. He
began to speed up his thrust and Buffy continued to meet him with
every one. They were both so close. She looked at him, deep in the
eyes and she saw nothing but passion. She saw love and passion and
need. And she couldn’t help what she said, she kissed him and
murmured.

“I love you.” that was enough to bring them both to climax, sobbing
as they came. The feeling was real and something she couldn’t deny.
Nor could he.

“I love you too.” he whispered to her, before she slid down off of
him. They arranged their clothes and left the alley. They exchanged
one more kiss before parting ways, both smiling and blissfully happy.



Chapter 14: Mistakes?


A week after what happened outside the coffee house, Buffy hadn’t spoken to Spike. Without saying anything they had both decided the Sunday tutoring session wouldn’t be happening. When she had gotten home Angel was gone but that hadn’t bothered her, she was still flying on cloud nine from earlier. She had thought about it constantly for the past week.


It was now Friday, finals were over and it was the last day of school, they would get the results of their finals in a report card that day in their class. Which had only twenty minutes left to go. Buffy was nervously twiddling her thumbs, when Willow leaned over to talk to her.

“I can’t believe summer vacation starts today.” she said excitedly in a hushed voice, almost bouncing in her seat.


“I know, I’m so glad I’m back here and get to share it with my bestest friends.” She replied.

They were interrupted by the sound of the teacher clearing his throat.

“Okay everyone, there’s only a few minutes left, so I’m going to pass around the reports.” he announced. Buffy suddenly became nervous again as he walked up and down the aisles handing out the envelopes. When he reached her she thanked him quietly, turning the envelope over in her hands.


Standing at the front of the class again the teacher looked at the clock.

“Ok, well the bell’s about to ring so, have a nice summer.” as he finished the sentence the bell rang and everyone jumped from their seats muttering wishes of a good summer to the teacher before rushing for the door.


Buffy and Willow ran towards their lockers where Xander was already waiting, a grin on his face.

“Hello ladies, how are my two favorite girls?” he asked.

“Good.” they replied together. When they had removed their things from their lockers the started for the door.

“So how’d you do on your finals Xand?” Willow asked her friend.
“Not as bad as I expected. I passed at least. I got 5 c’s and a b- but hey, better than usual” he answered good naturedly,. Xander knew he wasn’t a great student but he didn’t let it bother him. He was a good person “How about you two?” he returned.

“Willow smiled proudly, “All A’s” the others groaned but congratulated her. They just weren’t surprised. As they walked towards the school gate they looked towards Buffy expectantly .

“Well, I told my mom I would wait until I got home to open them.” she said apologetically. Willow and Xander just shrugged, accepting it. As they walked through the gate they heard a car beep its horn and turned in the direction of the sound. Buffy smiled at the familiar black car, moving closer to it, Spike’s head popped up over the roof with a smile

“Hey luv, how’d you do?” he called out to her. She knew he meant the finals and she just shrugged.

“Don’t know yet,” she called as she approached “told mom I’d wait until I got home.” Spike pouted.

“But I want to know now.” he demanded walking over to stand on the pavement next to her.

“Stop being a baby and be patient.” she teased upon seeing the pout.

“Fine,” he grumbled “but I’m driving you home,” he turned to the others “you guys too if you want” he offered.


However, Willow and Xander could see that they had to talk so they shook their heads 'no'.

“Thanks anyway.” Willow gave him her usual friendly smile, he returned it as he went back to the drivers side.

“Alright then, jump in goldilocks.” he motioned to Buffy to get in the other side, which she did while she called goodbye to her friends.

“Hey Buff, Bonze tonight.” Willow reminded her.

“Definitely, see you then.” she waved as they walked away.



As Spike began to drive an awkward silence overtook the car. It drove both of them crazy, neither regretted what happened, but both thought the other did. Soon it all became too much.

“We need to talk.” they said simultaneously, the both chuckled slightly.

“You first.” he told her.

She sighed. “Look Spike, I know you think what happened last week shouldn’t have happened but...”

“Wait a minute,” he cut her off “I think you mean you think that.”

“No, I don’t regret it.” she disagreed.

“Well neither do I.”

This stunned both of them, they couldn’t fully believe how wrong they had been about how the other would have felt about the week before.

“But,” he continued “I don’t want to hurt Drusilla. I do like her. I don’t know what to do.”

Buffy’s heart sank but she could understand where he was coming from. “I know, and I know he’s not the greatest guy in the world but I do care for Angel.”

That seemed to decide it for them both.

“So we keep trying the friends thing.” Spike finally concluded.

“Yeah,” she said softly. They pulled up in front of her house. She got out and went round to Spike’s side, popping her head through the window.
“Gonna come in, share the news with us?” she asked, genuinely wanting him to be there.

“I don’t think...”

“I want you to.” she insisted.

“Ok.” he smiled as she stood back and he got out. He followed her into the house, but Joyce wasn’t there She looked around finally finding a note on the fridge.

“Buffy, had to go to the supermarket and run some other errands. Be home soon. Dawn at a friend’s house. Mom. X.”

“Sorry,” she turned to Spike looks like we’re gonna have to wait a while.” then she noticed the pout was back. She sighed as she realised just how cute he was when he did that. And truth was she really wanted to know how she had done. The envelope in her pocket was burning a hole their, she didn’t want to wait. She pulled it from her pocket smiling sheepishly.

“I wanna know now too.” she peeled back a bit of the seal “Ok here we go, cross your fingers.” she ordered, he did as he was told while she tore into the envelope pulling out the piece of paper.


Spike jumped when she let out a scream, well an excited yell.

“Oh my god.” she yelled thrusting the paper in his face .

He looked it over and then let out a whoop of his own “This is great, luv.” he congratulated.

“I can’t believe it 4 A’s a B and a C. Oh my god, Spike this is all because of you.” she thought she had done ok but not that well. She was so excited that she threw her arms around him in a tight hug. She felt spark surge through her at the contact.

When they pulled away she gazed into his eyes and saw the same passion and love as the week before. And just as the previous week she couldn’t help it, she kissed him. And he didn’t hesitate to respond. Probing her mouth for entrance.

“I want you.” she gasped pulling back slightly.

“You’ve got me.” he declared..

She pushed his coat off his shoulders as she walked backwards to the stairs. She pried their lips apart to run up them and waited for him at the bedroom door. As soon as he was there his lips were on his once again. She pulled him into the room, leaving him to kick the door closed. Before he knew it she had his shirt over his head and his belt almost undone. There was no going slowly, this was pure want and need. He slipped her tank top over her head trailing kisses along her neck and shoulders. She moaned, tangling her fingers in his hairs for a moment before going back to undoing his belt. She pulled it out and then undid the button and zip of his jeans. They fell to his knees and she pushed him onto the bed. Kneeling in front of him she pulled of his shoes and the slid his jeans off the rest of the way. She kissed up his chest and neck until she reached his mouth and kissed him soundly on the lips. He pulled her to a standing position, he pushed down her skirt and the skipped off her thong, relishing the look of her once again. She pushed him backwards, kissing him softly along his cheek bones. Those had always been her favourite feature when she looked at him. So sharp and they made him look incredibly sexy. She crawled up his body, straddling him. She took his penis in her hand, pumping it a few times before placing It at her entrance and sinking down on it.

“Spike.” she gasped.

She began to thrust up and down slowly at first, quickly picking up in speed. As always their rhythm was perfect. They just fit so well together In every way. He moaned as she bounced on him. She felt like every time she was with him it just got better and better. She was so close already, just the fact that it was him almost being enough to send her over. Spike could feel how close they both were and flipped them over, pounding into her furiously.

“Buffy,” he breathed “god, love you… so bloody much.”

“Love you too.” she said through a moan.

He moved his hand between them and began rubbing at her clitcircling it with his finger. Buffy moaned and gasped as she moaned against him, her legs wrapped around his waist to pull him deeper. He thrust a few more times, they looked into each others and then they were coming together. Moaning each others names as they did.

As they came down slowly he kissed her softly, then rolled off her. They lay side by side for a moment. Not saying a word. But that couldn’t last, the perfection of it couldn’t last.

“What are we going to do?” she asked quietly, wrapping her arm around his waist as she turned to him.

“I don’t know,” he responded kissing her softly on the head “I don’t know.”

They didn’t think much as they were soon asleep in each others arms, feeling for now like they were the only two people in the world.”

Chapter 15: Stealing Kisses


Buffy entered the Bronze, looking around until she saw here friends and hurried to join them. She slid in beside Willow, muttering a hello. She was feeling so great, Spike had been gone when she woke up that afternoon, and although she understood why that was, she didn’t like it, didn’t like the feelings it caused. She didn’t know what was going to happen, they had agreed they didn’t want to hurt the people they were with but what did that mean for them? The way she saw it, it meant that they either kept sneaking about or they stopped seeing each other in any capacity and she honestly didn’t think she could do that.



Willow noticed something wrong in her friend straight away. She was different from the excited girl she had been speaking too just hours before. And she didn’t know why. But she had a feeling that it might involve Spike in some way. She decided that as Buffy’s best friend it was her job to find out what was wrong and do what she could to help her. So after whispering to Xander to go and get drinks and snacks, she started trying to get her friend to open up.

“Buffy what’s wrong?” her question was curt and to the point, sometimes that was the best way.

“Nothing.” she replied, Willow however could see clearly in her eyes that she was lying. So she put the look on her face that meant Buffy had to tell her the truth and looked Buffy straight in the eye.

“Buffy, this is my resolve face. Now I want to know what is wrong with you and do not lie to me.” it was an order. Willow, although normally timid, wasn’t always so when something was wrong with her friends.

Buffy sighed looking away, not able to bear the look in her eyes when she told her “It’s Spike.”

“Well I guessed that much already,” Willow told her “But what’s it about.”

“I slept with him.” she said softly.

“You did?” Willow exclaimed, this had not been what she had expected.

“Twice.” Buffy’s voice was now barely a whisper. She dared to look at her friend and the look she saw was not the one she thought she would see. It was confusion but understanding at the same time.

“Buffy, tell me,” Willow prompted “let me help you.”

Buffy nodded “The first time was last week, after our final tutoring session, I had an argument with Angel about drugs and Spike and I spent the whole session talking, he promised he would help me through it that day in the hospital and he stuck to that promise. So we left and I don’t know, I just I kissed him. It just felt so right, we ended up in the alley behind the coffee house.” Buffy stopped as soon as she heard the gasp escape Willow’s lips, she saw her friend’s wide eyes and regretted saying anything. Willow instantly saw Buffy about to retreat back into herself and reached out putting a hand on her arm.

“No Buffy, don’t s.top there. I’m sorry I was just surprised but I’m okay with it. Tell me. I’ll be ok with it.”

Buffy breathed a sigh of relief and continued “So after that we didn’t see each other until today, he drove me home and I invited him in to find out how I did in my finals with me and mom. Well mom wasn’t there, she left a note saying she had gone to run errands and I couldn’t wait to find out so I opened them. I was so excited that without thinking I hugged him, and then that led to us kissing which led to us sleeping together this afternoon.” she finished confiding what had happened to Willow. She went quiet again hoping Willow would just let it go but she didn’t.

“Buffy, do you still love Spike?” she asked.

“Yes.” Buffy choked out, trying to hold back the tears that were forming behind her eyes.

“Does he love you?”

“He says he does, but neither of us want to hurt the people we’re seeing because we do care about them.” Her reply was honest but her uncertainty showed through it.

“Buffy, I think you and Spike have to decide what you want.” she made this her last comment on the subject as she saw Xander coming back, with two new people in tow.



“Hey, look who I found.” he announced as he placed the drinks on the table, motioning with his head to Spike and Drusilla.

Buffy’ heart skipped a beat when she saw him, but she was also hurt to see him hold on to Drusilla’s hand.

“Hi Spike,” she greeted “Drusilla.”

“Hi.” he replied. Drusilla didn’t acknowledge her. She let go of Spike’s hand so that he could pull up a chair, sliding in beside Buffy so that he couldn’t. Spike noticed this and it annoyed him slightly, but then thought it was probably for the best.

As he took his seat he asked “So did Buffy tell you guys her good news?”

Xander shook his head in the negative “What news Buff?”

Buffy blushed slightly “My finals.” she looked over at Spike who smiled proudly back at her “I passed them all. I got 4 A’s a B and a C.”

A cheer went round the table from her friends, Drusilla stayed quiet, watching the display and loathing the look on Spike’s face. Spike was hers.

“That is so great Buffy.” Willow was excited and glad for her friend she knew how hard she had been working “What did your mom say?”

“She was ecstatic to say the least,” Buffy grinned “she was more excited than Spike and I were if that was possible.” she cringed at the slip of the tongue. She once again looked at Spike and saw the surprised look he wore. She mouthed a sorry to him.

“Well, of course you were both excited, you two worked together to get you those grades and it paid off. You both put a lot of effort in.” Buffy could have hugged Willow for saving her like that.

“Yeah red,” Spike spoke up “but really it was all down to Buffy, she just had to believe in herself.”

“Thank you.” she said to him “So, who’s going to dance with me, by way of congratulations?” she questioned.

“I will.” Spike said perhaps a little too eagerly, ignoring the look Drusilla gave her Buffy stood up and allowed Spike to lead her to the dance floor. As they got there the song “My Immortal.” started to play. It made them look at each other as it was the song that they had first danced to together when they were going out before she moved. She wrapped her arms around his neck, he placed his hands on the small of her back and the swayed to the beautiful song.

She could feel the connection between them, it was always present, not just when they were having sex, it was a connection they always shared.

“Spike.” she whispered .

“Yeah.” he said just as quietly.

“The words of this song are true you know, you still have all of me. I still love you.” her voice was still as soft as when she first began to speak, only now a tear trickled down her face.

“I feel the same. And we’ll figure something out.” he promised, pulling her closer allowing her to rest her head on his shoulder. They stayed like that, gently swaying until the final notes had played. They walked silently back to the table, but Buffy didn’t sit down.

“Excuse me, I’m just going to go to the ladies room.” she said.

“I’ll join you.” Drusilla said. She stood and stood, walking with Buffy. Once they were inside they saw no one else around. Drusilla looked at Buffy and began to talk, her words dripping with venom.

“Stay away from Spike.” she warned.

“What are you talking about?” Buffy tried to sound nonchalant, acting like she had no idea why Drusilla said this.

“You know perfectly well what I mean little girl.” her voice was dangerous almost deadly “Spike is mine but I see the way you look at him and him at you, the stars have told me that you love him. But you will never have him, he’s mine.” She repeated.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Buffy was terrified, Dru didn’t seem very sane, but she refused to show her fear. “Now excuse me.” Buffy walked straight by her and into one of the stalls.

Drusilla, satisfied that Buffy had gotten the message walked out of the ladies room, not noticing Spike standing in the shadows. He waited for Buffy to come out. When she did he grabbed her by the hand and pulled her to the stairs which led to the balcony. As soon as he was sure they were completely out of sight his lips were on hers in an urgent kiss. Buffy granted him immediate entrance. She wrapped her hands tightly around him as he pulled hr closer. By the time they pulled apart they were gasping for breath.

When he had composed himself he kissed her again softly.
“That was to say sorry for leaving this afternoon, but I thought it was a good idea unless we wanted a repeat of last time we slept together in your room. Didn’t think you wanted your mom to walk in again.” he smirked a little and she couldn’t avoid the giggle she allowed to escape. She felt better now that he had actually explained why he left.

“I guess I can forgive you then, but we better get back before we’re missed. And I don’t want to get into this with Wills again.”

“You told Willow?” this worried him a little.

“Yeah. I was a bit upset earlier because you had left and I didn’t know why and she knew that I was lying to begin with. But she won’t say anything.” she assured him.

Spike nodded he trusted Willow. So he pulled Buffy into one last kiss before letting her go and rejoin the group and going outside for a cigarette. He didn’t smoke often, but he was feeling a little stressed.



Buffy smiled as she went back to the table. Nobody questioned where she had been, Willow because she had a fair idea, and Xander because he was basically clueless. Drusilla was still satisfied that she had scared Buffy which is why she didn’t say anything.

“Buffy, we were wondering the fair is in town down on the pier this week. Want to go tomorrow?” Willow looked excited. Buffy opened her mouth but a deep voice answered for her.

“Of course she does.” the voice said from behind her .

Buffy spun in her seat and saw that Angel had been the one to speak.

“Angel what a surprise.” she forced herself to sound cheerful but she didn’t really feel it.

“Yeah, I was thinking all week about our argument and you’re right and I’m sorry.” he kissed her on the cheek.

“Ok.” was all the response she gave him, not wanting to get into what had happened.



Spike came back inside and went towards the table, seeing Angel standing behind Buffy, hand on her shoulder. He clenched his jaw when he saw her smile at him. Jealousy coursing through him.

“Hello all, what’s going on?” he then pretended to only just notice Angel standing there “Oh, peaches, what are you doing here?”

“I came to see MY girl” stressing the ‘my’ “and agreeing to take her to the carnival on the pier tomorrow.” his tone was smug and Spike didn’t like it. He tried to ignore it.

Drusilla however noticed the look and decided to use it to her advantage.

“Oh Spike, that sounds so wonderful,” she turned to Willow “do you think we might join you?”

Willow looked at Buffy and saw her pleading her to say no, but being Willow she was incapable of doing so.

“Sure.” she agreed.

Drusilla smiled in false delight, clapping her hands.

“Goody,” she exclaimed “We’ll have such fun.”
Spike and Buffy both groaned inwardly, both knowing how awkward the next day would day would be.


Chapter 16: All’s fair in love and war (Here endeth the lesson)


Buffy rolled out of bed the next day and groaned, dreading the day ahead. Not only did she have to spent the whole day with Spike acting like she was okay seeinghim with Drusilla. But she had to do it while Angel was there. She just hoped nothing happened and Spike and Angel tried to kill each other. She stood at her
dresser, picking out her clothes, after picking her outfit she headed for the shower. They were leaving at eleven and it was ten now. So she had just enough
time to do everything. After her shower she stood at her dresser mirror, drying her hair. She then applied her make up to perfection as always and got dressed.
She had chosen a pair of denim shorts and a pale lemon halter. It was nice and summery looking and casual and comfy enough for fun at the fair. By the time she came downstairs it was almost eleven. She had just enough time to have a slice of toast before the others arrived. Dead on eleven the doorbell rang and she went
to the door finding everyone there except Angel and Drusilla.

"Dru is meeting us there." he told her as he came inside. Buffy nodded .

"Yeah Angel too. By the time he waked up and everything." Spike repeated her action, nodding his head in acceptance of what she said.




Spike noticed Dawn watching them all chatting excitedly about their outing and went over to her.

"What's up nibblett?" he asked, hating to see the hurt look on her face.

"Nothing." she replied glumly.

"Come on, you can tell me." he gave her the smirk, that her crush on him prevented her from ignoring.

"Just bored is all." she told him.

He could see that the youngster felt left out. Everyone else was going out to have fun for the day and she would be stuck at home by herself.
He had an idea.

"You wanna come with us Dawnie?" he asked her, and was glad he offered when he saw how her face lit up.

"Can I Buffy?" Dawn asked excitedly, anxious that her sister would refuse.


Buffy had every intention of doing just that until she saw Spike give her a look that was asking her to let her go. She saw how excited her sister looked at the prospect and she couldn't refused, she sighed as she finally gave in.

"Okay, you can come." she said..

Dawn hugged her sister excitedly.

"Thanks Buffy." she squealed as she ran upstairs to change.

"Yeah Thanks," Spike repeated "She feels left out. You did a nice thing."

"I know. I couldn't refuse her when I saw how happy she looked at the thought of being allowed to go." She smiled a little at him.





Forty- five minutes later everyone was finally ready. And they were almost at the pier. Just as they were about to leave, Joyce had given Buffy forty dollars, thanking her for allowing her sister to tag along. Now Buffy and Spike were walking side by side, both fighting the urge to hold hands. Dawn was walking ahead of them with the rest of the gang.

"This should be an interesting day." Buffy observed..

"Yeah." Spike couldn't find words to express how much he hated it. Buffy could.

"I don't know if I can bear seeing you with her all day. Kissing her, holding her hand, any of it." she told him.

"Me either, I can't help but think I’ll rip the wanker's head off if he touches you. It's gonna be torture." he allowed his hand to brush hers briefly. She looked at him and smiled somewhat sadly as she thought about the day ahead.

They noticed Dru and Angel talking as soon as they approached the pier. They exchanged looks and quickened their paces. They parted as they came closer
to their counterparts. Buffy going to Angel and Spike to Drusilla, each sharing a kiss with their partner.




They walked further down the pier to where the rides were as the did Angel leaned in closer to Buffy to talk to her.

"What is your baby sister doing here?" he asked, sounding annoyed for some reason.

"Spike and I invited her." she said simply.

"But we can’t do anything if she's here." he moaned.

"You're my boyfriend Angel, it's hardly gonna be a big deal if I kiss you or hold your hand." she reminded him.

"That's not what I mean" he took a joint from his pocket, giving her an answer to what he meant.

"She's going to tell your mom" he complained.

Buffy shook her head in disbelief. "It doesn't matter because I wouldn't have been doing it anyway. I told you that last week."

"Oh come on, Buffy."

"No Angel, I don't want to, so let it go" she ordered him angrily, annoyed that he didn't seem to have taken in anything she said the week before.

Angel put the joint in his pocket and walked away to somewhere more secluded he wasn't going to miss out.








The group walked along together all laughing, they had been there for almost an hour and had been on a few rides. Dawn carried a teddy bear that Spike had won for her, it was a huge eeor from Winnie the Pooh and Dawn was so happy with it. She felt kind of special. Dru hadn't been happy that he had given it to Dawn and not to her, but Spike ignored that fact. They were now approaching the Ferris wheel. Buffy looked around for Angel, she hadn't seen him since he stormed off when she first arrived. Buffy did not have a good idea about that.

“Who’s gonna go on the ferris wheel with me? Dru?” Spike asked.

Dawn was already in a cart and joking around with Xander, Willow who was afraid of heights had refrained from going on. Dru turned her nose up at the idea.

“No, Spike, it’s a silly and pointless ride.”

Buffy smile smugly, using Dru’s attitude to her own advantage.

“I’ll go on with you Spike.” Buffy offered, smiling sweetly. Spike was glad that it was Buffy and not Dru, he walked over and helped her in and then climbed in himself.

“Alone at last.” he purred as the ride began to move. Buffy giggled girlishly at the statement, but she was also glad that she was on the ride with him.

“So, you having fun?” he asked, trying to make normal conversation to stop him from kissing her breathless

“Yeah, I am actually. And Dawn is having a blast.”

Spike smiled “I’m glad, she’s a good kid.”

“Yeah, I guess.” Buffy agreed, but jokingly made it sound like it was hard to admit to.
But Spike knew she loved her sister. The cart came to a stop at the top. Buffy looked straight ahead knowing that if she looked at Spike she wouldn’t be able to hold back. Spike, she soon learned wasn’t trying to. She felt his hand trail up her thigh and shivered at the touch.

“Spike, we shouldn’t. Dru-“ she was cut off as he ran a finger across her crotch through her shorts and she let out a breathy moan.

“Dru is down there, we are up here.” he whispered, kissing along her neck he continued to rub her through her shorts and she was writhing against his hand, wishing he would do something more. He had just started to undo the button of her shorts when the ride began to move again

“Just a taster for later then.” he promised as the ride stopped at the bottom for them to get out. Willow noticed her friend’s flushed face and didn’t have to think too much about exactly what had gone on. They were about to walk to the next ride when Angel came up to them grinning wildly.

“Hello baby,” he said to Buffy in what he seemed to think was a seductive voice “wanna come around the back for a quickie. You can take your cell and have Spike here call like he did last time.”


Buffy stared in horror at her boyfriend’s words, he’d taken some sort of drug and she was positive it wasn’t just the pot. She looked and saw Spike looking hurt and confused.

“What are you talking about?” he asked Angel, grinding the words out through gritted teeth.

“Oh you mean she didn’t tell you?”

“Angel please don’t do this.” she begged.

“Tell me what?” Spike yelled.

“About the time you called her in LA, just before she came back here.” he laughed a little, knowing he was going to enjoy telling him this.

“You called her.” Drusilla screeched, everyone ignored that however, all too caught up in the important part.

“Buffy what is he talking about?” Spike looked so confused, he didn’t know what was going on

“Spike I am so-“

“She was screwing me.” Angel announced, laughing at the devastated expression on his rivals’ face.

“No,” Spike wouldn’t and couldn’t believe the words were true.

“Oh yes. When you called, Buffy was in the bathroom of a club fucking me six ways from Sunday, while she was talking to you.” Angel finished smugly, then he went over to Buffy, placing a hand on her breast “So how about it baby, how about another go. Haven’t had any from you any time I’ve visited.” Buffy tried to push him away but he gripped her wrists.

“Come on baby, I love you, you love me.” he shrugged as if that was all the explanation needed.


Spike’s hurt turned to anger but not at Buffy, at Angel and when he saw him touch her again he lunged for him, pulling him off her and throwing him to the ground.

“Keep your hands off her.” Spike warned, his voice dangerously.

“Or you’ll do what?” Angel challenged. Spike never one to turn down a challenge hit him with a right hook to the face, Angel didn’t retaliate with fists. Only words.

“She’s mine Spike,” he got closer to Buffy and took her necklace in his hand “And why are you still wearing this. You don’t need it, you have me, I don’t like you wearing it.” he told her, scolding her as though she were a child.


Buffy had enough she snatched the pendant from his hand and narrowed her eyes “Look Angel, I don’t care If you like it or not. Spike and I are together and you’ll just have to get used to that.” she didn’t realise what she had said until she saw 4 sets of wide eyes and two angry sets staring at her. She clapped her hand to her mouth.

“You little bitch, I warned you.” Drusilla screeched flying for Buffy, Xander grabbed her before she could reach her. But nobody managed to stop Angel who tackled Spike. However Spike soon gained the upper hand and hit Angel a few times before getting up. He looked at Buffy, and walked over to him.

“Are we?” he asked her “together I mean.”

Buffy cupped his cheek. “Yeah, if you want to be.”

“I want to be.” he affirmed, kissing her softly. They heard a loud cheer and looked to see Dawn and Willow jumping up and down happily, Xander grinned as he kept hold of Drusilla.

“Just one problem.” Spike said to Buffy pointing to Dru, he watched Buffy’s face fall. He walked over to Dru and leaned down to look her in the eye.

“We’re through Dru, and don’t ever threaten my girl again.” with that he walked over to Buffy again taking her hand, he turned to the group of actual friends.

Who wants to go to the beach?” he asked casually. Everyone laughed and agreed. Xander let go of Drusilla and walked with Willow and Dawn behind the couple towards the end of the pier and to the beach.





Buffy and Spike sat together on the beach, it was the same spot as the last day they had been there together. They were sitting the same way and were once again watching the sunset. They were oblivious to the chatter going on with the others just a few feet away.


“Wills, could I speak to you a minute?” Xander requested. She followed him and stopped beside him.

“What is it Xander?” she asked.

“Um well, I was just thinking, seeing those two I just thought that well maybe it’s never too late to try again, and I was thinking maybe we could-“

“Try again.” she finished.

“Yeah.” he said softly.

“I’d like that.” she said

“Me too, because I kind of love you, Wills.”

Willow could have yelled with glee but she settled for kissing him softly before pulling back.

“I kind of love you too.”


They walked back to Dawn smiling and she gave them an evil smile pulling something from behind her back.


Buffy leaned back into Spike’s chest as they watched the sun go down.

“I love you.” she said softly.

“I love you.” he replied equally as soft.

“I’ll never get tired of hearing that.” she giggled.

“And I’ll never get tired of saying it.” he promised.

Buffy gripped her necklace.

“Do you think we’ll always end up back together?” she asked him.

“No,” he answered, she looked at him quizzically, a hint of hurt in her eyes. He took her hand “Because this time it’s forever.”

Buffy smiled echoing his words “Forever.” he kissed her a soft kiss full of love
They both smiled contentedly as they turned around again watching as the last of the sun began to disappear. This time they noticed the flash of the camera and looked over at their happy friends seeing Xander kiss Willow softly and Dawn with a sappy grin. They looked back at each other and said together “Forever.” they leaned in for another kiss.


The End.

~FIN~

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